Should I tell my boyfriend that my dad is autistic?

[strawberries98]

Hi everyone,

I have been with my boyfriend for 2.5 years now and planning on getting engaged and married this year and having kids. However, he hasn't met any of my family yet.

My dad has undiagnosed autism/Aspergers. A few of the men on my dad's side have it. The females don't have it.

Am I obliged to tell my boyfriend that my dad might have autism? I feel like I want to tell him so he can understand me and my family better. It is difficult to get along with my dad, and so far I have pretended that my family is just normal. However, I am worried if I say that he will think I have bad genes and might pass it along to our children. If I should have kids with autism I don't want him and his family to think that the genes are from me. should i just keep my mouth shut?

Thank you!

Having read the whole thread, I actually think the ASD thing is only part of the issue.
OP's boyfriend "selected" her as she was under 35 and less likely to have a baby with a condition like Down syndrome or whatever. She also cited that he would be worried about "bad genes". As ASD is often genetic, and knowing she has a father with possible ASD, she mentions this.
Yes, having a child with ASD is difficult, even if said child is "high functioning". But is ASD the main issue here? Would the boyfriend be just as negative about any other genetic condition, given the fact that he chose her as she was "less likely to have a child with Down syndrome"?? That's a bizarre reason to go for someone.
And, even if she did warn him, he was OK with it and they did have children, there is no way of knowing a) if the child will even have ASD and b) the severity of the ASD if a child does have it. Everyone with ASD is different.

toffee1000 - from your post I begin to think that there is a second possible explanation for the "boyfriend" as well as the "he's a controlling arse" theory it is just possible that he could be on the spectrum himself. As I could see someone with ASD thinking very logically and saying these kind of things - which normally would not be said.