Porn advice

[loubellex]

Hi ladies I need your help and advice !
So I had my beautiful second baby a few months ago.
A few weeks ago I was on my other half laptop and a porn pop up came up. I'm not one to snoop it's so out of character but I did.
His history was full porn which i DO NOT have an issue with , I went back months and months I just couldn't stop looking okay fair enough he wasnt getting much off me due to being pregnant !
But my issue was all the porn he was looking at was 'chubby black girls' or 'ebony beauty'
I'm skinny and white ! He's always been with white girls.
I just can't seem to shake it I've spoke to him about it and he can't give me an answer to why he says he don't know
It's really bothering me I now feel like I don't know him at all.
I don't know what I want to hear but please help me get over this !
Thanks x

I think if most of us truly had to expose our fantasies, we'd generally be embarrassed about some. They are so private.
You have accidentally discovered some of his (or his behaviours), and it's like having read his private diary. It is so so intimate and to be 'found out' can be very embarrassing.
He might open up in time, but for the moment, I think you have to try and understand why it might be hard for him to talk about it right now!

@beansontoast nope, you practically told op what she was saying was racist because she had a problem with him looking up exclusively black porn, when (as op confirmed) the point being made was not about it being black women per se, but being something which op obviously wasn't, and never would be.
Take a seat yourself, ppl are allowed to point out if they have inferred something different from reading the op, you on the other hand, were implying a case of racism.

@Fitbitironic oh shut up and stop trying to say things I have not implied or said explicitly.

I asked a question... I got an answer.

ODFOD!

Why are you more insecure that is porn with black women than with a white woman. I cannot point to where your outrage is.
Your words beans

But my issue was all the porn he was looking at was 'chubby black girls' or 'ebony beauty'
I'm skinny and white ! He's always been with white girls.
And those of op. Seems pretty obvious she was wondering about his attraction to women who were completely different to herself.

I didn't read all the comments but all I can say is every human has different sexual idealisms and fantasies. I myself look at porn, and it is always 3 somes, and I masturbate weekly while watching these videos. Would i ever want a real life 3 sum, NO !! My sex life is amazing, we experiment and have it at least 5 nights a week. But what MY OWN fantasies are, are just that, MINE. Same as your hubby. He is allowed to have fantasies and watch porn based on whatever he likes, PROVIDED not obviously illegal / under age / animals and alike. We all have our little perversions. Even the most pure and clean cut people have a darker side no one knows about. As long as hubby clearly loves you and your sex life is fruitful, don't stress over what porn he watches. We are all human after all!

@TheBrilliantMistake LOVE what you said, so on point! :-)

Maybe he is looking at different women from how you look as he feels less guilty about his pleasure.

When you consider the categories of porn out there, is the ones he's looking at really so upsetting?

Actually I suspect the OP feels awkward about admitting she generally doesn’t feel happy about her DH looking at porn , any porn, quite as much as this , I feel the same way but it seems these days we all have to be cool about it when partners have gone into’wants’ and not’occasional needs’ territory. It is perfectly ok to not be totally anti porn as such , but not expect it to be a multi times a week secretive occurrence and many of us on here are being made to feel guilty for feeling this way.

There's a very emotive subject that some women have been known to fantasise about, would never want to happen in real life.

Yes. Ive spoken to women who have admitted to rape fantasies...but wouldn't want it in real life.