Brave Babes Battle Bus: Next Stop Fabulous February

[SweetLathyrus]

Hi, I'm SweetLathyrus, Sweet for short, and I've been on and off Gerald the Brave Babes Battle Bus since 2014. Over the years, lots of us have maintained the thread, most of all the lovely Mouse, who has been here since the early days, and still scurries onboard when she can.

The bus is a place of support, safety and occasional silliness for those of us struggling with our relationship with alcohol. Some of us are sober, some are trying to be, some are moderating and aren't ready to give up alcohol just yet.

So whatever your reason for questioning the whys and WTFs of your drinking, hop on board, make yourselves comfortable and join in. Driers and Triers, all welcome.

2018 has been a busy year so far, lots of new travellers as well as old faces; if you want to read back on the journey through Dry or Dryer January so far, here's the link to the last thread

And in case you want to know how it all started, here is the link to JWN's original, inspiring thread.

Join us on our journey, you won't regret it.

baking try and find out if there are any knit and natter groups near you, often wool shops run them. If not, YouTube do some good tutorials

Slings, how was the garden? I would have loved to get out there, but just didn't have the strength.

Mint, nothing quite like country air is there! And the countryside is peaceful too - yeah, especially when they are taking the calves away from the milkers .

Ma have you given 'D'H a time limit? Sorry about your friend, some people just don't have any empathy or filter.

Anitt tea seems somehow even more deviant than asking for coffee

Made, hope you've had a better day. How long before you can bid adieu to retail and start the new job?

Waves to Baking, Spanna and Lux.

Spanna apparently the other evening when I was in bed, DS threw a massive paddy because his half term had been rubbish. I'm not taking any notice, illness happens, he wasn't well enough for the first half; he has a father - not that he has seen him since Christmas (which DS cut short by choice); or he could have gone out himself. Feb is always bad for us because the uni doesn't have half term, so I feel your pain.

Good evening, end of weekend update. Been working all weekend (retail jobs are pants). Half term next week and having to work through that. Sorry not had chance to read everyone’s post properly but scanning through its nice to hear such supportive posts. I’m a bit peeved tonight DS2 went to his dads today and he was treated to an Xbox game even though XDh still owes me money for joint Xmas presents and DS3 birthday presents. Was being nice at the time and bought everything expecting him to do the decent thing and repay me. Won’t make that mistake again.
Unfortunately I’ve succumbed to two miniature bottles of wine after a hectic weekend and I know I’ve got a much needed lie in tomorrow.
Will take time this week to read through the thread and try to get to know you all a bit better.

Evening all babes and bear.

I've had one of those super productive Sundays where I've done all my jobs. A lot of washing and also some work paperwork - but one of those nice feelings tonight where I am 100% prepared for the working week.

Zero booze consumed today so that's 25 days this year. I am really enjoying the DJ app to track progress. Aim for this week is to get to one month off in total - I'm not happy that I've had more drinking days than not with my holiday and a few other bits and pieces off.

Other aim is to get back on track with WW - my eating has been monumental since I landed back in the UK on Tuesday. I literally can't stop scoffing, which is most annoying as I hadn't seen a full length mirror for 3 weeks and I definitely lost weight whilst away. I don't want to undo all of that as was looking quite svelte (am still not getting on the scales until after skiing).

Anyway night night all. x

Spanna I remember being a stroppy teen well and feeling angry for no reason – she will grow out of it, I promise

Hi Jayne sorry exh is being a prat. Any chance of you having a cuppa and a early night?

Well done on being so productive twattage my Sunday has been a v. lazy one. We can be healthy eating buddies maybe? I’ve been good all weekend after a 4lb gain last Thurs, was planning on a ham sarnie for tea but as the bread was stale I threw a paddy and have demolished half a chocolate orange and 4 gingernuts instead Back on it tomorrow and gym at 7am!

Thanks Ma, Sweet, Baking and Spanna, I’m feeling a bit more positive now. I’ve had arsey customers but this one seemed so angry at me personally, it really hit me. Need to develop a thicker skin I think! Shouldn’t be too long on the job sweet. They are still doing checks on me which should take around 4-6 weeks. I’m not too worried as I passed police specials vetting back in the summer so the civil service should be ok. Ordinarily I’d be looking at starting training end of March/April time but as I’m going on holiday in April it’ll have to be later. They have got start dates in May though so around that time. I’ll be sad to leave – most customers are lovely – but I’m ready now I think. I won’t let work know until I have to – I’ll give 3 weeks notice – as otherwise I can see lots of crap shifts/late nights falling my way as they won’t need to keep me happy anymore (cynical, me?)

I’ve got lots of lovely plans coming up. I’m going out with friends on Saturday (have an early finish for a change) and meeting another for a coffee or food on Sunday. I am working all week but have some nice shifts for a change.

Morning all and made - absolutely happy to buddy up.

I am usually really good with my food but I think a combination of jetlag and PMT sent me into a spiral! I also have unpredictable periods as of two years' ago (I'm 43) so definitely peri-menopausal and the hormones are all over the place.

Anyway day 26 dawns and this is my first full week at work for ages...I'm not feeling great this morning - had a flood over the top of my mooncup overnight so had all that to clear up first thing (sorry if TMI - I hate these changes in the 40s, everything is going haywire). Think I've lost about 30ml of blood since this time yesterday - need to get to the doctor very soon as feel like I'm becoming anaemic.

Anyway, no thoughts of booze, so that's good.

xxx

Actually double that to 60ml - apparently they hold nearly 30ml - I've more than filled it twice in the last 24 hours...I need to get to the doctor. x

Morning All.

Twattage that's not a good way to start a Monday morning. But at least you got everything else all sorted for the week

Jayne I spent years hoping for the best from DS's father, I was always disappointed. I'm fortunate that I could afford not to rely on his 'contributions' (all £26 pcm [wow]). People can be funny over money even when they get along. Anyway, I hope you have a good rest day.

I'm having to brave the horror of my email inbox after six days of ignoring it. What part of 'off sick with flu' do people not understand?

Anyway, I had a really good night, I'm beginning to forget how awful my sleep used to be, I often didn't sleep past 3am, and never felt rested.

Those of us who started on Jan 1st, I think, today is day 50, isn't it? Half century!!

Morning

Made - I work in retail it can be very upsetting how customers treat you sometimes and it’s hard not to take it personally.

Twattage- Interesting I’ve been thinking of trying a mooncup I’m the same age as yourself still have regular periods but have been wondering if I’m getting peri-menopausal symptoms always put them down to my alcohol consumption.

Sweet- I don’t know why I thought he would miraculously stop being an arse when we separated. I can financially support myself and DCs and in future won’t let him share the credit for what I buy.

I’m disappointed that I gave in so early to the wine witch even though it was only two glasses I didn’t really need them. It’s mad the excuses I give myself there is always a good reason. Hard day at work, good day, off tomorrow, lonely, with company.

Would be lovely to hear some good reasons and positive outcomes from everyone just to keep me motivated over this first week I would love to know what I’ve got to luck forward to.

Morning all.
I can eventually move after the dreaded flu, still fragile and tired but most definitely on the mend. One minute I was feeling a bit tired and the next, BAM I had flu. It literally just hit me. I have lost 9lbs in a week but instead of looking all svelte I just look like someone who has been poorly.

Sorry not got much energy to add to the conversation. Maybe later.
Have a good day

Jayne, the first week or so is really hard because your habitual responses to any situation are very close to the surface and you haven't over-written them with others yet. So, yes, "I'm sad" - drown sorrows in a glass; "I made it to the end of the week" - relax into a glass of wine; "Something to celebrate" - crack open the bubbles; "Dinner's on" - glass of wine to go with it.

The best thing to do is not to have any in the house, make reaching for a glass difficult, uncomfortable, make the alternatives easy. The cravings will only last a little while and may just be about being hungry or thirsty. The other thing is I've tried moderating with those 'little' bottles, but they're not really little at all, most are a third of a regular bottle, it's just that our perception of a glass has been warped by the marketing of glass sizes in pubs.

For the first two weeks, maybe longer, I kept a bottle of fizzy water in my hands at ALL times, I also let myself substitute wine for any sugary crap I fancied (really easy because there was so much left over from Christmas), you can deal with healthy eating later. Put pjs on as soon as you can so you can't go anywhere. And read as much as you can about quitting - start Claire Pooley's Sober Mummy blog from the beginning, she is resolutely positive as well as honest, so you will have benefits to look forward to!

And, record all of your thoughts, no matter how repetitive or insignificant you think they are, so that if you are wavering, you'll know why you're giving up, and that you can get through it.

After a few weeks, wine will stop being part of your every waking thought, and as the weeks go on you will think about it less and less, but you need to be proactive about making alternative habits.

Sequins I know that feeling!

madein1995
I understand how tough retail is. I worked for the big Orange shop for a couple of years. I left after so much bullying shit from my section manager and the final straw was when a customer threw an item of food in my face andcalled me a lovely name and the manger's backed him up and gave him a shopping voucher. I went on the sick, took my four months with stress and handed in my notice two weeks before the sick pay ran out. I can't even go back into one of those shops.
Twattage13
Hope the doctors go ok. That's quite a bad amount to loose. Eat lots of spinach for the iron.
SweetLathyrus
There are about 200 hundred young bulls up here. Beef only. They are so stupid. I had to guide one back in the gate yesterday as it got stuck in a corner facing the wrong way.

Spring is definitely on its way. Our starlings are back in the barn and Stormin'Norman is out and about, he has spent the winter living and getting fat in the feed store.

Mint I have a special contempt for male pheasant (apologies if this upsets Norman). They are honestly the stupidest, vainest birds on the face of the earth. There are a lot of shoots around here and so many go walkabout - they are the only creature I know that will saunter back out in front of on-coming traffic having safely negotiated away from it! Plus Sweet Dog is obsessed with them, they are the reason his recall is dubious!

Haha. Norman does like to stare at himself in the window reflection.

Spanna* I quite like the idea of wall to wall cross stitch but my walls are already pretty full! I'm into photo's and have hundreds framed everywhere. I also have big poster boards of cards up in my room like a student

Slings We have a wool shop in town that I noticed the other day. I'll have to call in and ask.

Sweet I'm at day 50 today!! I'm very impressed with myself. I definately feel better for it. I honestly never thought I'd get so far as usually my attempts are pretty rubbish.

Twattage Mine&DS's diet has been really crap over the last week. I'm blaming half term. I've meal-planned the rest of this week starting tomorrow when we're back in work/nursery.

Sequins Glad you're feeling better.

Jayne I was the queen of excuses when it comes to drinking. I'm happy, sad, lonely, anxious, cross, bored. Any reason would do. I can't have anything in the house that I'm not allowed to drink. At first I had lots of nice soft drinks as a replacement but I don't feel as deprived now.

In terms of positives. I'm much less anxious. I feel more content. I sleep better (and get up easier). My skin is clearer and my nails seem better but don't know if that's not drinking or just because I'm chewing them less.

Afternoon.

sweet, the garden was good yesterday, I didn’t do much, just pottered and thought about what I might do if I had the energy! Glad I went out though because it’s been peeing down all day today and due tomorrow too.

Norman is lovely mint, lots of pheasants here, we get them in the garden and the dog chases them. They are stupid creatures but pretty, actually could say the same about the dog!

made I haven’t worked in proper retail since I was about 18 (a very very long time ago) but since retiring I volunteer in a local “not for profit” craft shop a couple of days a month. It never fails to amaze me what customers expect from you - I’ve been sworn at because the cafe over the road was shut, shouted at because we didn’t stock whatever that customer wanted, shouted at for not knowing the opening times of local tourist attractions........etc etc.

sequins proper flu absolutely floors you doesn’t it. I cringe when people walking about, working and functioning say “I’ve got flu”. No you bloody haven’t.

jayne, spanna and anyone else with teenagers, I survived 3 and have the scars to prove it. They can be vile, but they grow out of it eventually and become almost human!

twattage that’s a lot of blood loss, get thee to the GP.

baking meant to say yesterday re crochet, if you look at YouTube tutorials, make sure they’re UK not US, it’s different. Give me a shout if you need, I teach crochet.

ma hope you’re ok. Enjoy your time with Richard.

Anyone I’ve missed, sorry.
WH is away for a few days so am happy. Snuggled on sofa with a cup of tea and daft dog. Cake in the oven. Early night in clean sheets for me.

Evening all - thank you for the lovely comments. I am still feeling a bit crappage but just going to jump in the shower now, pjs and bed.

Am trying to decide if I should get private medical insurance through my company at the moment - I can afford it (I run my own Ltd company) and if so may hold off going to the doctors.

I have been reading up and it appears you can have endometrial ablasion which I know a few other people have had in their 40s for this kind of thing. I am not sure how available it is on the NHS though - maybe I should post on the health board instead?

What I don't want to do is go to the doctor, declare that my periods are terrible, and then find out I can't get it treated for ages on the NHS or then it's a pre-existing condition for my insurance...

Sorry rambling a bit but just thoughts that have been going through my head today.

No thoughts of beer, which is a good thing. Day 26 nearly done.

Jane - have a read of here about symptoms www.drstephaniegoodwin.co.uk

Sorry totally hijacking about non-booze related problems today!

Am getting worried about skiing next month now as may come on in the week we're away and wanted to buy some white salopettes to go with my new pink ski jacket...it could be a terrible mistake!

Baking, we should decorate the bus with cross-stitch and bunting to celebrate our 50 days , that's quite possibly as many AF days as I managed in the whole of last year.

Slings, nothing like a cuddle from a daft dog and clean sheets - though the two are mutually exclusive in this house (grubby, muddy mutt!).

TWAT I hope you are feeling OK.

A friend of mine had that ablation thingy - she refers to it as having her womb microwaved - on the NHS but that was about 8 years ago and in Cornwall.

Twattage, sorry, cross-posted there then went away to do something else. I get the dilemma re going to the NHS then finding its pre-existing condition for the purposes of an insurance. I also presume there would be some limit to how quickly into a policy you could begin treatment without them classifying it as preexisting? You may just have to bite the bullet and go

And do you mind that I had a little smile at the white salopettes and pink jacket, if you went with a red/pink and white Jackson Pollack design, no one would be any the wiser .
Stay cosy.

sweet just spat out tea and hello rothbury .

I was thinking of getting medical insurance from the new financial year (April) and I could leave it a few months as TBH I don't have time to take a week off work for it on top of my hols this year unless it's a medical emergency. But yes I don't think I could just rock up and get it done two months later!

Off to consider if white salopettes are a good idea or not - jackson pollock! I've found some for £45 online which look fine. I had a new jacket for Christmas but I don't want to spend a ton on the bottoms.

Morning All.

First proper day back at work. Anyone else get really nervous when they go back in after an illness?

Day 51, the second half of my 100 days, it definitely gets easier for those of you just starting out, and I'm pleased not to be on the merry-go-round of endless day ones I've done before.

Have a good day, Babes, see you on the other side.