A wasted life

[Fishinmusician]

I am 60 years old. I have wasted my life...When I was young, I wanted to be in the entertainment industry, this was my first mistake. I am smart, I could have attended college and done anything like most people do but I did not. That was my second mistake. I married an adulterer and well, some of you know the pain of divorce. Mistake number three. I had a brutal open heart surgery 4 years ago, almost died, but made it through. A year later I got Endocarditis, a blood infection, almost died again. I will be going to have a second open heart surgery to repair the damage the blood infection did to my heart. I have no family, no wife, no children...what is the point anymore? Don't do what I have done. Make every heartbeat every day count! If you are angry, take that anger and do something good, help someone..you will find this works. If you are lonely FIND the RIGHT person. I have literally wasted my life...I bet God is super disappointed with me.

It's never too late, OP. Start setting some goals.

Wow...I never expected to receive such support...I am deeply grateful to each of you. Thank you for giving me a lift even if it's for today.

We might have foul mouths, but we mean well...

Best wishes for your future operation and I hope recovery isn't too hard.

My nana will be 90 next month. You could have another 30 odd years left to live. Some people don’t get the first set of 30 years, never mind twice or three times. Turn your mindset around and start taking your own advice. Only you can do that for you. No-one else can. Do you want to get to 90 and think “fuck, I had 30 more years and sat moping about wasting the first 60 instead of living the last 30”?

Fishin, you and me both on the 60 front. As well as the 'i've wasted my life' front. As well as the very serious knocks that have brought me to my knees.

For a start, I think around about 60 is the time you look back and can very easily think it was all crap and rubbish and useless. As much as I'm thinking that about my life I suspect it isn't accurate. Yes we'd all like to be wonderful and gung ho and daring etc etc but not many of us are. Some are but an awful lot aren't. Most.

Things happen. yy i get that your point is we shouldn't let things just happen, we should push for our dreams. That is a relatively new view of life if I may say so. You're measuring your life up to today's standards when you and I were germinating in the 70s when people didn't even go abroad on holiday, not really.

Bad luck with the heart thing. I raise you with cancer. I got over it but it's left a pretty serious dent in me somehow, shocked the living daylights out of me, left me feeling vulnerable and a bit of a shadow. That's just the fallout from serious physical illness (and treatment) imo. This too shall pass and all that.

Keep going. You and me both.

Best of luck with the op lovely.

btw God is good and kind and gorgeous. Not disappointed, no. You are but God isn't.

See the doc about your mood. I'm seeing the doc about my mood (which I really do think is the fallout from serious illness). Exercise is a bit of a wonder drug - can you do any?

Suggest find one thing per day that makes you smile. I agree exercise is good, even if it is a small walk. I would suggest volunteering for something local, you never know who you Will meet. Try something new,if you don't like it , try something else. You need to put a bit of effort into making some changes. Make a list of things that you want to do and start ticking things off the list. Go on some holidays, cruise, coach.