Tonight me and DH have had a bit of a row which escalated from something of nothing really.
Set up is that we've been married for almost 5 years, have a 3.5yr old and a 4 month old baby.
Relationship is under the usual strain that relationships are when a new baby is on the scene but in general I thought things were ok and it's just a case of waiting for normal life to resume when the 'new baby' passed.
However, tonight DH has said he doesn't feel like part of the family and that he's just "a body".
He kept saying, "What is it exactly that I do in this family?"
He said all his life consists of is going to work, coming home and looking after the children for a bit and then going to bed and that it's the same every day. He said this is the course of life we've chosen and how it is is how it will always be.
He said something about no longer feeling like he's in a relationship and that he just a 'bit' that brings in the money and that's his life.
He was barely looking at me during the argument and he just seemed exasperated by me because I was asking him more about how he was feeling.
He said a few other things but the general gist was that he wasn't happy with our life as a family. He made me feel as though he saw me and our children as a burden.
I ended up in tears, I told him I was upset to hear him saying these things but there was no reassurance from him. It really felt like he just didn't care anymore.
I could hear the 3 year old crying because he could hear us arguing and it broke my heart. I went and saw to him and then returned to DH but he just kept saying the same things and I felt like he just saw me as an irritant because I wanted to talk to him.
He said, "I don't want to talk about this now."
I said it wasn't fair that he would say all this stuff to me out of the blue and then shut me down by saying he didn't want to talk about it.
I ended up in tears again and just walked out. I'm now sitting in the bedroom, with the baby over my shoulder, feeling like shit and scared for my marriage.