Getting ones own back

[KnittyNattyNoo]

Ive been inbed -ill with flu -and have been on MN as its a great time waster! All these threads about the OW made me think about my ex and his OW over 20 years ago..Anyhow I found her on Facebook and had an urge to message her and tell her I'd been sleeping with her husband - who she looks very happy with along with 2 lovely daughters.

She ruined my life, and I so want to ruin hers...stop me someone...!

Erm it was your ex that ruined your future.
And tbh I think after 20 years its time to let it go.

No, No, being poorly and bed bound has sent your mind wondering through the years and typically it takes you to the negative times, you then start dwelling on painful, hurtful experiences and the emotions you felt are revisited. You've lost all sense of perspective and time, it's all behind you in the past, this man and his family are not your future and as you become better you will see this.Revenge is over rated it doesn't decrease pain and anger, it just takes you one step further to losing control.Cling onto the present and bring yourself back to your current life.

Totally get where you're coming from. Depends on the original circumstances as to how seriously I'd consider making her feel the same hurt and distrust though. Did she know he was with you at the time. Was he your dh or dp? Did you have children at the time?
Even the Bible advocates 'an eye for an eye', does it not? And ppl should certainly be prepared to reap what they sow. As well as treat others how they want to be treated (which I hope is how a lot of us work), so it would be fair for her to feel the same as you did if she went into it knowingly. It's not worth destroying the kids lives over though. Maybe the anonymous postcard could just set out exactly how she would be affected if someone did the same to her now, and express the hope that she's a better person nowadays? I'm assuming ppl other than just you knew she was an ow?

Anonymous revenge postcard? Whats not to like?

Enjoy thinking about it. I would enjoy thinking about it for the OW who destroyed my marriage and cast such a long shadow over my children's lives.

Have you had revenge on your ex yet? I'd say he was more culpable.
I wouldn't do it. It makes you seem bitter, spiteful and nuts. Not to mention a complete liar.
You probably won't agree but she did you a favour. You might have ended up wasting years of your life on the cheating bastard. Read the thread about the woman who feels trapped in a relationship with a cheating DP who just had a stroke.
Let it go.

Eh, your ex is to blame, if it wasn't her, it would have been some other woman.

Why would you try to cause problems in a family 20years later.

20 years and you're still stalking her on line? Time to move on from it.

And how is your life ruined? You're the one who married a cheating scumbag, didn't she do you a favour because at least now you know what he is. Well 20years ago. And aren't your kids adults now?

awww so THIS is how these nutters begin!

She didn’t destroy your life, your ex did, why would it make things equal by destroying her life too?

It’s a crazy idea and very messed up, maybe you should seek help if your still that angry after 20 years.

The OP definitely needs help.

You need professional help 20 years later seriously you sound an absolute loon.

Grow the fuck up.

Revenge is a dish best eaten cold. She persued my husband knowing full well I was pregnant with my daughter. My eldest was 3. She knew this and carried on threatening to tell me they were having an affair unless he left me, which he did right before the birth. Unforgivable, both of them, and my children have suffered from this. I don't absolve him of any guilt either, they both did it. Yes, I would like to rattle her cage a bit. Who wouldn't??

But you would also be hurting her husband, who as far as I can tell hasn't done anything wrong and will be accused of something he hasn't done. Just don't.

How bitter do you sound move on and be happy.

Lots of people wouldn't

It was over twenty years ago! You need to get over it.

I probably won't...its just a great idea!

In what way is it ‘a great idea’?!

So, they would be a cheat and you would be a liar. Not much in it really, is there?

its just a great idea!

That is without a shadow of a doubt the worst idea I've ever heard.

Fucking hell.

In the words of Elsa
LET IT GO

side note - you might want too seek some help if you still hold this much resentment after 20 years. It isnt normal.

Is she now married to your ex?

You sound really unwell (in the head) OP.

Your posts are utterly disturbing and you sound like a selfish child.

Everyone on here obviosly have excellent relationships and have never been cheated on whilst pregnant. Heaven forbid someone should revel in a bit of 'getting your own back' ...

She ruined your life and your kids lives. So let's get revenge and ruin the lives of her two daughters and partner too (if not your exh) 🙄 You sound batshit crazy.