The Brave Babes Battle Bus - New year, old battles, big resolve

[SweetLathyrus]

Hi, I'm SweetLathyrus, Sweet for short, and I've been on and off Gerald the Brave Babes Battle Bus for years, so this time it's me standing in for our wonderful Mouse to invite you on board.

The bus is a place of support, safety and occasional silliness for those of us struggling with our relationship with alcohol. Some of us are sober, some are trying to be, some are moderating and aren't ready to give up alcohol just yet.

So whatever your reason for questioning the whys and WTFs of your drinking, hop on board, make yourselves comfortable and join in.

If you want to see what it's like, here's the link to the last thread, the one that saw us through Christmas.

And if you want to know how it all started, here is the link to JWN's original, inspiring thread.

Join us on our journey, you won't regret it.

It's weird I can only ever manage one Becks Blue and I don't want any more. I love the first few mouthfuls and then it's like diminishing marginal utility all the way.....rarely finish one.

Another one looking forward to an AF night. Nails, facepack, paperwork audit. Pj's in a minute and bed by 9pm.

Well done everyone, it's dark, so in my book that's pj time.

I am beginning to feel the benefits in terms of concentration, I've got loads of silly little admin jobs done today, things I've been putting off, but that will make next week much easier. I'm looking down the barrel of some 12 hours days next week, with the rest probably ten hours (without travel) just to keep up. I couldn't do it drinking, I would be using the wince to quiet the stress, then ringing in sick because I couldn't get it all done.

So have a good one, I'll try to pop in at least once a day (we'll soon be needing another new thread at this rate!).

My PJs are on - like you sweet I have a big week at work ahead, including an audit :(. I shall be facing it with calm and serenity and lots of good sleep.

Benefits at the two week mark:

• Most of my red face has gone
• Bloating has gone down
• I have stuck to my WW plan 99% and I've also eaten all of my weekly extra points rather than drunk them (consequently I have eaten loads of nommers food and still not gone over) - feel confident I will finally get to a healthy BMI this year
• I look thinner (I'm still not getting on the scales until a week on Thursday)
• Apart from Thursday when I was stressed and tired, I have found it pretty easy to abstain from beers (much, much easier than trying to knock wine on the head)
• There has been a lot of err 'action' even though we're both working FT (kind of holiday levels) :)
• My hair is more shiny
• I'm in a particularly good mood
• Running is getting easier and faster
• I am a lot less anxious about work (have barely thought about it this weekend)
• I'm getting 8-9 1/2 hours sleep a night - if I wake up for the loo (must try to drink less rooibos of an evening) I am getting back to sleep after reading maybe one chapter of my book rather than lying awake for hours.

Am convinced on this evidence that I would prefer not to drink whilst I'm on this contract, at least through September. Plan is to be in the sidecar for holidays but not in the UK.

I'll say night all as am going to watch a bit of TV and then read my book.

x

Evening and well done to all who have managed dry January so far, and heartfelt encouragement to those still trying.

Iv succumbed today and am now emotional/ angry and disappointed in letting the wine back in, its strange really as I was seeing life/ home/ relationship in a clearer way if that makes sense?
Maybe the reason why I just wanted some wine to again was to fog' up the reality of issues that have become the norm.

Having been AF now for 23 days, the 'look at myself' benefits were very encouraging, skin, hair, self esteem, bloating, motivation, belly, general outlook were slowly claiming back ME.. only took one clear thinking 'oh is this how it is in reality moment? to change that outlook.
I aim to kick it back into touch but the fallout from being 'present' will be a big change for me and us as a family. It has been coming for a while so I hope this renewed dry courage remains within me.

I’m not sure if it’s widely available in the UK, but this Heineken AF beer is the best one I’ve found (and I’ve tried a lot!). Here in Foreign Climes it’s in all the supermarkets - someone drive the bus due south and we can stock up!

Margie yes you can definitely get it - in bottles at least. I know this because the husband accidentally bought me some in December and I had to send him back to swap it out!

I'm safely in bed and I have not had a drink. Phew!
Have eaten myself senseless and drunk pints of water and soft drinks plus 3 AF beers. Thanks for the encouragement ladies. Day 12 beckons.

sofa Don't beat yourself up. 23 days makes you a god to me. Hope you can pick yourself up tomorrow.

@sofability don't worry about one blip, I do understand as I did this a couple of weeks ago and I was really cross with myself. Just do what people told me to do and think about the positives - it's only one down day out of 23. Start again tomorrow and don't beat yourself up about it
twattage I'm really pleased you are noticing the benefits that's great 😁 you must feel brilliant, especially to look thinner and having lost the bloat and have shinier hair too.

I had a bit of a funny evening - I was desperately craving wine earlier while cooking dinner and it made me feel quite bad tempered - it was a really bad craving. I don't know why particularly. Thankfully I managed to get over it and have stuck to raspberry and lemon cordial and fizzy water in a wine glass. It was hard though.
Also I keep wanting to eat sweet things, e.g. Chocolate, biscuits etc. Do you think this might be because I want to replace the sugar I was getting from wine, does anyone know please?

trying the desire for sweet things is exactly that. your body is craving the sugar it used to get from wine. It's why we don't automatically lose weight at first, but that will come as you re-adjust. Deal with the wine first.

Interesting you mentioned being bad tempered. I felt quite angry today with this whole no drinking thing. My birthday was flat and boring and pretty much a non event. I am starting to feel resentful. This is new territory for me so not sure if this is par for the course at this stage.
Day 14 done anyway. Good night all

Evening all, not been around but not fell off the bus again! Just busy with stuff this end. Another new week ahead and I will not drink. Well done all you babes and bears you have stayed AF. Happy Birthday ma and mouse x

Well I am still going thru hell.
Yesterday after suffering intense burning eyes and frontal lobe headache for days, I came home from shop in a terrible state with lager.
Dp took it off me before I could drink any and called my neighbour who came round. (She works as nurse specialist with alcohol addiction, has been supporting me) She has put me back on Librium, got to see doc tomoz.

Driving was so scary, vision weird, felt like I was really stoned.
Mad thing when I started car to come home tho'... radio came on and Amy Winehouse 'rehab' was on, bizzare day in all.
Hanging on by the skin of my teeth but I am still sober... and that is all that matters for now.

Well done to everyone who has made it through the weekend.

For those who have found themselves in the sidecar, grab hold of one of our many hands and jump back on board.x

Thanks ma that's kind of what it felt like - the craving thing - like I was annoyed I couldn't have a drink and I was so so tempted to have one but didn't and tomorrow's another day so will hopefully feel different.
That does make sense about the sugar from wine. I had hoped I would have lost a bit of weight still though as I've consumed about 15 or so bottles less than I would have done if I'd been drinking but hopefully weight loss will come later, as you say one step at a time.
I am sorry your birthday was a bit flat today but you should use feel really pleased that you have made the decision to treat your body well by not drinking. I hope you enjoyed your relaxing treat day on Saturday and your meal out on Saturday night I also hope you feel better tomorrow x

Hey all - hmm... thinking about the feeling bad tempered. I was horribly bad tempered for the first few weeks of not drinking during the week. Don't seem to be suffereing wtih that this time. For me though, it seemed to be directed at DH who was happily getting sozzled every night as per.

Sorry your birthday was a bit dull Ma. Mine tend to be a bit pants if I don't organise something myself. DH is particularly shit at that sort of thing. What is it about the no drinking that is making you angry? Is it the 'it's not fair! I want to drink normally like everyone else' thing?

On day 14 here. No cravings. I am frightened that I will get complacent and it will sneak up on me when I least expect it.

Morning all babes and bears - day 15 today.

9 hours' sleep but unfortunately the restless, boiling, PMT type of hormonal sleep (unfortunately guess stopping alcohol hasn't totally fixed my hormones)! It may do when I lose some more weight.

I am 42 and have been peri-menopausal for at least 18 months / 2 years and getting to a healthy BMI / cutting down booze are also part of my thinking this year. I want to be the best that I can to deal with this shittage.

trying - absolutely the sugar thing is v well known. Keep going, you will lose weight but don't stress right now. It's more important to not be drinking. And yes I do feel much better generally (although I'm a bit hot and bothered this morning TBH).

ma - bless you. Do you think your birthday would have been flat and boring if you'd also had a drink? Or was it that no activities were organised to make it more interesting? Try to separate out the two?

flowers - the anger thing is also a thing. It feels unfair that we can't drink wine / gin etc like normal people. Well I don't want to be normal anyway as that's boring, but I don't mind being different.

Am off client-side for the next three days so will be working and then sleeping mainly until Thursday.

Stay strong all. x

sofa and *spring - big hugs...hope you have had a good sleep and a better day today. x

Morning all.

Spring, it's so good that you have support. The headache and swimming vision you describe is just the same as I have had on and off for the last week, I can't decide if it's withdrawal or a virus, but I hope you get better soon.

Ma, I suspect quite a lot of my birthdays have been a bit 'meh', but I've drunk my way through them . Hopefully next year you will be in a good place to make it the day you want.

Trying, what Ma said about. Sugar, but it does settle down, I get bags of nuts from Lidl (there mixed nuts are the best combination, no peanuts!) and just have a few instead of a biscuit now, helps to even out the blood sugar, and I'm starting to see a lowering of hunger levels and Sudan craving.

Heading out to work soon, taking SweetDog ( he's a big star around campus). Have a good day all, today is a day I will not drink.

Thanks For the encouragement twattage sorry you had a rubbish nights sleep last night. Hormones have a lot to answer for don't they.
spring sorry you had a bad day yesterday but I hope you feel better now after some sleep. I'm glad your DH is supportive and also hope you get the help you need from the doctor today.
Sorry for any typos am on phone without glasses on 👓

Keep going babes it gets easier after about 2 weeks which is where we’re at. Even if you have to white knuckle it just hang in there.

spring you did really well. It’s just one day at a time for any of us. X

Morning babes, happy birthday to ma and mouse 🐁

Day 17! I enjoyed the weekend, had some important conversations with loved ones and got things done that I’ve been putting off.

I haven’t really bothered to contact my heavy drinking friends (and they haven’t contacted me either) which has made me realise I invest far too much in unrewarding relationships. I’m fortunate to have a wide circle of friends and have been busy with them over the past fortnight... And they’re the ones with careers and hobbies and plans that don’t involve drinking til you’re sick.

I do care about the drinking circle but they’re inconsistent, dramatic and often miserable. A bit self-centred. (I suspect I have been the same.) I’m going to make a lot more effort cultivating the friendships that are actually rewarding. It’s harder to have a proper conversation than it is to grab a bottle and talk shit but it means so much more.

I’m also trying to reduce social media use. It doesn’t make me happy.

Morning babes and bears, still trying to catch up. I’m out for tea again tonight to catch up with friends and they asked if I was still doing DJ. I of course never said I had a blip . Onwards and upwards x

Quickly dashes onto bus to announce proudly, Day 22 here.
I'll catch up with you all later.

Hi everyone

I keep oversleeping as I am still find it hard to nod off without booze but I know sleep will come eventually. I am feeling good really, and like everyone else, hoping that eventually there will be a double reward of no booze and weight loss.

I was planning a walk around campus today but it has poured with rain - maybe tomorrow.

Wow well done mint 22 days is brilliant! Sorry sweet I didn't see your comment about sugar. I wish I'd read that and I wouldn't have scoffed two Cadbury chocolate Christmas biscuits as soon as I got in the door from work. I guess I'll be better when all the Christmas stuff has been eaten(not all by me hopefully but looking that way!) I must get some nuts or something healthier than choc.
roth I thought I would find sleeping a problem as relied heavily on wine to help me sleep bit actually after the first few nights I am falling to sleep quite easily - it's so lovely as not waking up and lying awake for hours during the night either. What I've been doing - and I think it helps - is having a nice mug of chocolate ovaltine about an hour before bed and then wearing an eye mask when I get to bed to block any light - I'm sleeping better than I have in a long time.

Thanks trying I have some hot choc and will try that tonight.

I have just arranged a meet up with friends but deliberately organised it for somewhere we will all have to drive to and on a school night - crafty eh?