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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

I have to leave don’t I?

111 replies

brokeninmoreways · 07/12/2017 20:58

My husband. Tonight, kicked me three times and called me names.

I have bruises and a gash,

It’s two hours later and he hasn’t apologised. I locked myself in another room but he made a point of using it.

I’m broken. He is normally nice but this was a kickboxing attack over portion control on oven control. I’ve lost sense of what is reasonable but I’m fairly sure he isn’t the person to tell me what is.

Did I cause this? Criticising him for putting out 6 fish fingers, and 13 chicken dippers and two waffles for one person? Even if I did, and was being unreasonable, should I get kicked?

OP posts:
laudanum · 07/12/2017 21:21

There is no reason on earth for him to have done that to you. You didn't deserve it, you didn't cause it, you didn't do anything wrong. Do you have somewhere you can go?

LexieLulu · 07/12/2017 21:23

Call the police now, he will be kept there overnight and you and your son can safely leave tomorrow

Awoof · 07/12/2017 21:25

What lexielulu said. You didn't deserve that. Nobody does.

Awoof · 07/12/2017 21:27

Wild guess but if this is steroid mood related roid/rage then you really are better dealiñf with this swiftly

Original poster
brokeninmoreways · 07/12/2017 21:29

It’s not steroids. Unfortunately I think this may just be who he is.

He’s gone to sleep now- still in a mood with me so luckily I didn’t have to justify why I didn’t want to talk to him

OP posts:
JaneEyre70 · 07/12/2017 21:29

999 lovey. Now. The Police will remove him, not you and your son. He is a monster and you can't stay. And they will sort medical help for you. Please do it.

Bluesrunthegame · 07/12/2017 21:30

So sorry to read this. It's time to take your son and go, call the police, get him out of the house and get yourself somewhere safe.

Thinking of you.

SparklyMagpie · 07/12/2017 21:34

Oh OP, as you already know, you and nobody deserves this!

A shiver went down my spine when you said " it's not the first time but first time he's kicked me "

You and your son deserve so much better, you really do!

How old is your son? Do you have any family or friends you could stay with?

This needs to stop!!!

cestlavielife · 07/12/2017 21:35

Ok
Go to another room
Call 999
Police will come
They will Wake him up and take him away
Why should he get a good night s sleep ?

Call 999 and report now

debbs77 · 07/12/2017 21:35

Absolutely ring the police, right now while he sleeps. They will remove him instantly

GypsieQueen · 07/12/2017 21:35

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. Your number one priority is to get yourself and your son safe. Can you find a quiet room where he won't hear you and call the police? You have been assaulted and need to report it. The police should come and remove him from the house. You cannot stay with this man as he is dangerous. There is a lot of help and support out there. Once he is out the house you can make those phone calls.

cathyclown · 07/12/2017 21:35

Has he done anything like this to you before now? Has he lashed out previously?

Just asking. Once is enough though as you know. Are you in danger now?

It is very easy for all of us well meaning souls to say get out now, call X and Y, find passports etc. But you are traumatised and are probably not thinking straight.

If you both work day shifts, could you take a day off tomorrow and get yourself sorted in some way by having time to think.

IMV what he did was criminal assault.

I am sure you will get the advice you need as the thread goes on.

oldlaundbooth · 07/12/2017 21:35

You need to leave.

Don't look back.

SparklyMagpie · 07/12/2017 21:36

Now would be the perfect time to call the police OP! Do it for you and your son!

oldlaundbooth · 07/12/2017 21:37

95% isn't OK if he's hitting you even once.

It's 100% NOT OK.

BewareOfDragons · 07/12/2017 21:40

Please call the police and have them remove him. Then pack up your stuff and your son's and leave first thing in the morning.

Please take care of yourself.

user9217 · 07/12/2017 21:41

What @cestlavielife said.

Do it now OP please. You're number 1 priority is to ensure you and your child are safe - the only way to do that is by removing him immediately!!! ThanksThanks

Livingthedream12345 · 07/12/2017 21:42

Either call police now or pack a bag.
Take passports, bank cards, marriage certificate, driving licence, recent proof of address. Soft toy and blanket for your son.
Go somewhere safe.

user1497997754 · 07/12/2017 21:42

Please phone the police.....they will take him away......you can then get some sleep.....him doing this is so bad on every level.....protect yourself and your son he is a bully....get rid asap

iBiscuit · 07/12/2017 21:42

I don't think you should leave, no. He however must be removed. As everyone else says, call the police.

CountTessa · 07/12/2017 21:44

What happens when it's the big stuff? If this was just about 'portion control'

Be strong, do right by yourself. Be brave.

Lashalicious · 07/12/2017 21:44

One time is too many. Wait until he is out of the house to be safe then pack up and take your son with you. Call a lawyer and begin proceedings. I’m sorry this is happening to you. Flowers

NaiceBiscuits · 07/12/2017 21:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Yeahsureokay · 07/12/2017 21:46

Op he has assaulted you, you need to call the police. I know it's scary. You won't be alone, everyone is here to hold your hand. Don't be afraid, stay brave now. Think of your son. It's time to protect you both. You need a life free of abuse. Flowers

AdalindSchade · 07/12/2017 21:47

Can you call 999 and he will be arrested and removed from the house

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