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Original poster

Louise Redknapp isnt following the "perfect wife" script.

105 replies

HelenaDove · 09/10/2017 18:11

www.the-pool.com/news-views/opinion/2017/41/rachael-sigee-on-louise-redknapp-perfect-wife-strictly

Interesting article. Good for her Smile

OP posts:
theaveragewife · 10/10/2017 08:08

But what she said in the interview isn't an attack on Jamie ssd she spoke about feeling like she had lost herself.

roundaboutthetown · 10/10/2017 08:50

It all sounds very shallow - as though discovering herself is just discovering she is still physically attractive and likes lots of attention. I'm not getting how this is sending a useful mesage to anyone. Nor how it is any different from a middle aged man who suddenly starts acting like a young, free and single 20-something again.

theaveragewife · 10/10/2017 09:06

Because a middle aged man often hasn't had to put themselves second to everyone else.

Changedname3456 · 10/10/2017 09:49

You think a woman with her money (and she presumably had a bit of her own before shacking up with a very well paid footballer) really has to put “themselves second to everyone else?!”

Pull the other one. She had money and opportunity. If she didn’t want to stop singing she wouldn’t have had kids. Or having had kids, she had the money to employ nannies.

She had enough time on her hands to go swanning around the red carpet events with him, she launched several collaborations with other people, (which don’t seem to have gone too well, although that’s perhaps beside the point), and she had a presenting gig at one point. Not exactly the life of some poor, hard done by house Frau is it?

I’m sure there are plenty of single mums (and dads) who’ve found their choices a hell of a lot more limited than she has. Anyone is free to drop out of a relationship at any time, but she shouldn’t be trying to make it something it’s not, just for the dubious PR value.

MuseumOfCurry · 10/10/2017 09:57

Because a middle aged man often hasn't had to put themselves second to everyone else.

Where people are devoted to their children, they tend to put themselves second and effectively 'lose' themselves in a manner of speaking. I certainly think this is true of my husband, god knows he has his shortcomings but he spends his weekends on our children's various activities and gave up his notions of living in the countryside and working in archaeology for our London existence, all so that we could ultimately give them our version of the best possible childhood.

I wouldn't be too impressed with him telling me that he's lost himself and needs to pursue other avenues at this juncture, and vice versa. We're jointly devoted to our children.

I wouldn't couch this as a woman's narrative, it's Louise Rednaps' narrative. Wherever there's a good dad, there's a man who's 'lost himself'. It's just what happens, if you choose to see it that way. When it's over and your children are gone, you can't get that back.

JoanneCoften · 10/10/2017 10:04

I wonder if there are double standards at play.
If this was an ordinary, non-celeb woman unhappy in her marriage and warning to instigate change I wonder if the comments would have been different.

There are rumours of controlling behaviour and affairs from her husband, that in itself would be enough for someone to get out if that's what they wanted. Money and fame shouldn't change that.

Alisvolatpropiis · 10/10/2017 10:04

I don't think having money and feeling downtrodden and trapped are mutually exclusive. Hmm

If she was unhappy and felt she had to end the marriage, then good for her. Hopefully she will be happier.

There are some really dodgy comments on this thread.

JoanneCoften · 10/10/2017 10:08

Having read the article again, I agree with the OP. Good on her, wish I had the money and the courage to do the same.

Original poster
HelenaDove · 10/10/2017 13:18

Boney i am not invested in the church of celeb. I started this thread as a bouncing off point because many women do feel they have lost themselves.

Joanne i was thinking exactly the same. If it was a non celeb i think the answers would have been very different.

OP posts:
BoneyBackJefferson · 10/10/2017 16:20

HelenaDove

It was a general statement not really aimed at anyone.

susannahmoodie · 10/10/2017 16:35

" Wherever there's a good dad, there's a man whose lost himself"

See I completely disagree with this. Partly because the standard we set for a good dad is not the same as for a good mum.

There was a teachers thread the other day "how can you be a good teacher and a good parent" and everyone said it was impossible. But I know loads of male teachers who are good at both, in terms of what we expect a good dad to be. The difference is that they don't even ask that question of themselves.

scottishdiem · 10/10/2017 17:03

Husband earnings end (no longer on something like £70-100K per week) and now its time to move on. For a wide variety of reasons.

WetsTheVet · 10/10/2017 17:06

The transformation of her on Strictly was incredible I thought. It was so clear that it was reawakening her from just being a wife and mother. You could tell by the end of it she was a new woman.

roundaboutthetown · 10/10/2017 17:10

If her other half was controlling, unfaithful and abusive, that's one thing. Sensible to find some way to regain some control over her life. More or less just saying she lost herslf in parenthood and putting herself after everyone else but has now rediscovered herself and the only way to continue rediscovering herself is to move out of the family home and go out lots of with younger friends is just talking about a midlife crisis. It's not helping anyone but Louise Redknapp and is not by an exceptionally long stretch something to emulate. Fine if she doesn't want to talk about her marriage and any difficulties within it, she really shouldn't have to, but not fine to be set up as an example of how to deal with realising you have lost yourself!

TheLuminaries · 10/10/2017 18:22

She reminds of my mum. Bored in her 40s wanted a change. Could only justify her affair & walking out by trying to paint my dad as the bad guy. Trouble was, I was there and he wasn't. Fair enough, she didn't love him any mor and wanted out of the marriage- no quarrel there. But trying to turn him into a villain so she can be the martyred saint - fuck off with that.

Middle aged woman wants to end marriage - up to her. Doesn't make her a great person & her husband a bastard. Just makes them both human. Long happy marriages are rare gems.

HyacinthBooquet · 10/10/2017 18:33

I think she'd do well to shut up and just get on with life.

When she started out on Strictly she said she had refused to wear revealing costumes because she was a wife and mother and she didnt want to embarrass her son. Then today I read and article where she said 'by the third week Daisy was in my dressing room telling me I had a fabulous body and I should show it off so I decide there and then I'd wear the revealing costumes wardrobe wanted me in'.

Hmm
HyacinthBooquet · 10/10/2017 18:37

It all sounds very shallow - as though discovering herself is just discovering she is still physically attractive and likes lots of attention. I'm not getting how this is sending a useful mesage to anyone. Nor how it is any different from a middle aged man who suddenly starts acting like a young, free and single 20-something again

I agree.

I also thought the pictures we saw of her just a few weeks into the break up on a girls holiday were extremely disrespectful. Yes, she wanted out but the pictures were callous in the extreme.

Toadinthehole · 10/10/2017 23:40

Joanne

There are rumours of controlling behaviour and affairs from her husband, that in itself would be enough for someone to get out if that's what they wanted. Money and fame shouldn't change that.

You can gossip all you like, but the reality is that it's gossip and speculation, and certainly none of your business.

JoanneCoften · 13/10/2017 12:52

Toad, I know it's none of my business, but on the face of it, if a non-celeb woman in her position made a similar decision I don't think she would face the criticism that LR is facing.

I'm commenting on the double standards of this, not about the gossip, which I only commented about because someone earlier in the thread had commented about rumours.

gustofwind · 13/10/2017 14:35

There is a whole thread on here about leaving marriages because they are a bit meh.

I respect her decision as her decision, for whatever reason, regardless of his alleged infidelities bullish ways.

One day you just can wake up and simply say 'this isn't for me anymore'.

BanyanTree · 14/10/2017 18:02

I have absolutely zero sympathy for Louise Redknapp. She is worth millions and she had more options open to her than any of us on this board. She probably has someone cleaning her house, doing her ironing and every small thing that needed doing at home covered. She could have easily hired someone very qualified to do a couple of pickups and she could have kept her hand in the entertainment business. Now she finds that playing house doesn't suit her. I feel sorry for her sons, but not her.

theaveragewife · 14/10/2017 19:01

Money doesn't buy happiness, wtf has her having money got to do with it? As if that excludes you from losing yourself or having marital issues. All money means is a shinier car, or a bigger house, it's material stuff...

SonicBoomBoom · 14/10/2017 21:37

Her husband was very controlling of her.

I don't blame her for wanting out, but she should own that decision and do it quietly and with dignity.

BishBoshBashBop · 14/10/2017 21:44

Her husband was very controlling of her.

Any proof or just media gossip?

SonicBoomBoom · 14/10/2017 22:18

Just what I witnessed when I saw them.