I hope I don't come across as a goady fucker here but just from my experiences in life I have to ask. Plus reading threads here where things have gone tits up after kids....
(Disclaimer - I was not the OW in any of these scenarios)
First serious relationship- I was 19, he was 28 and divorced with 2 boys. We were together nearly 4 years but I never thought about having children with him, plus his constant whinging over the CSA resulted in the end of us. He really saw his kids as an inconvenience. Strangely, 20 or so years on I've met his eldest son in social circles who seems to have repeated his father's pattern even though he wants nothing to do with his own father (I don't blame him)
I married a divorced man who had a vasectomy after 2 kids. Again, they seemed like a real burden to him. He made hardly any effort when we had them stay, was all just Spongebob on the tv all day.
There's been others and I eventually divorced sponge bob dad. I dated someone for around a year who once started acting weird and "hiding" in a petrol station. Turns out he was hiding from his 18 year old child that I knew nothing about! Ditchednot long after.
I am now happily married for 4 years after remarrying at 41 . I really don't mind not havingchildren at all and neither does my husband. In fact, we relish being child free, especially when I see numerous threads on here re relationships breaking up post kids and the whole dramas of who is doing the night feed etc.
I feel I'm child free by accident rather than by design and I'm ok with that as I've never had that primal urge to procreate but really? Are most men just cajoled into parenthood?