Does my DH fancy my friend?

[revolution909]

Maybe you remember my older thread. This is my closest friend, they have a close friendship too. yesterday we went out for drinks the whole evening was somewhat convoluted , but when we got home he said "she's actually good looking, and she knows how to dress too, maybe you should ask her for some tips". WTH???? he claims it was supposed to mean something else, but whatever. Now I'm fairly convinced he likes her in that way.

Tatiana I know, I know. I was either in complete denial or blind. Does she fancy him back? I don't know. I made a joke about it last night , but she wasn't too shocked, she was way more shocked when she thought I had kissed her husband (which I haven't BTW)

DO any of your have pampas grass?

Does she fancy him back?

I highly doubt it based on your account of him. You could both do better.

We can't ever let women objectively rate themselves as beautiful or hot can we? If they think it they must be wrong and full of themselves. We can't be happy a woman is confident in herself and not insecure? Sad Mumsnet.

Ivy79 That made me giggle, i really needed that today. That's seems like the ultimate conclusion. Or it surely looks that way to an outsider i doubt most coupley frienships evolve that way.

Tatiana yes I doubt it too..

We're all allergic to cats (& dogs) in our house but my kids would love a cat. I despise them not the kids, cats).
Anyhooooo....
What's your solution which means you can have cats without your lovely husband having allergic reactions?
miaow

Thanks @hotsouple ! Even if we're delusional what's the problem, right? In the end that makes us happy!

@Jellyheadbang Fostering! They get their own "cat chalet" and by their own rules, the cats can never leave the shed or pen or catio whatever you want to call it. So no hair indoors, no allergies!

[takes note of OPs username so as not to get sucked into another self serving, dramatic, rambling thread]

So the solution to the cat problem is to cage the cats outside?

The last time I heard of a relationship like this, it was in high school.

Grow up OP

You can't keep cats in cages - that's not a solution that's cruel

I think there is too much emphasis on looks and appearance - it shouldn't matter this much or be that important
Does your DH make you happy - his comments don't sound kind

It isn't me who decides about the cage it's a charity! It's their own rules and I would think they know what they're doing?

My husband does make me happy, he's been great the past weeks. In the end that comment confirms what I suspected, that he fancies her (or has a crush, more like the latter given other stuff he said). I find crushes as something that happens, by their nature people grow out of them all the time. He obviously denies everything. When I had one at least I admitted it.

It isn't me who decides about the cage it's a charity! It's their own rules and I would think they know what they're doing?

A reputable charity would not permit fostered/rehomed cats to be housed in sheds/cages. Cats are not meant to be caged.

OP, you sound unwell. Please don't get any cats. It's not fair to them to bring them into your dysfunctional world. It would be more beneficial to invest your energy on repairing your mental health.

No cats in cages for fucks sake, keep your madness for humans.

It's Cats Protection so I would think they're pretty reputable. Google it!

Cats protection sometimes do require cats to be kept in outdoor catteries, that's true.

Cat protection keep them in cages when they are being fostered waiting for a home. I get my cats from Cat protection. And I think it's shitty to keep a cat in a cage and extremely selfish

I don't mean that your symptoms are not diagnosable as a MH condition. What I mean is that the relationship with him may the cause of (or at least a massive contributing factorin) your diagnosed MH conditions.

I also had CBT based on 'real/not real' when in an abusive relationship. It made things much worse because it was trying to get me to see he wasn't really abusing me, but he was, and guess what? He's been arrested (because he got worse) and I don't have any anxiety since I left him.

I googled Cats Protection and I didn't see anything about cages. But it was super helpful to get an idea for DD who wants a volunteering opportunity and loves cats.

Offred yes, there were lots of insightful posts on the last thread by OP, which went in the direction you suggest. You can take a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.

That's awful. If it was my dh he would have been out of the door!

I agree that he can make it worse, but my meltdown at work was completely unrelated to him. My condition is problematic because it does make me "abusive" sometimes. That includes my mom for example. It's just baby steps, but we're getting there