So I got left at a wedding today

[MozzchopsThirty]

Dp of 3 years was moody before going, I asked him several times if he wanted to go home and he said no
He didn't drop his bags at the hotel and then didn't want to drink so I kind of think he knew what he was doing

He didn't speak to anyone at our table and made people feel quite uncomfortable

I said too much water had gone under the bridge between us and he said 'shall I go then'
I replied 'if you like'

And that's that, now in a hotel room alone!!
What a bloody disaster!

Stay strong. Don't respond!

It's not a good relationship. End it.
He's done you a favour by walking out on you at the wedding - it's saves you having to ask him to leave.

He's lost his best friend which is a new one

Has he tried looking under the sofa cushions?

Seriously, you are worth so much more than this excuse for a human being. Block, delete, ignore. Repeat.

Block him. Don't get sucked in.

I'm just not engaging
I've asked him to leave me alone

I think if someone blocked me after a 3 year relationship I'd be pissed off.

I think if someone left me at a wedding with two rooms to pay for and no way to get home I'd be pissed off.

I owe him money for a holiday he nagged me to go on after we last broke up
I'm paying it monthly
I kind of need to keep channels open for that

xposted.

Good on ya, Mozzy!

I hope you're knocking what you paid for the hotel off what you owe him.

Is his name Mike from Maida Vale? Lol

Never thought of that!

Yes minus half the hotel

Sorry user I don't get the joke

He's just asked if we can remain friends

Do u think u could remain friends?
Personally I believe a cooling off period is always nessersary when ending a relationship, time will tell if u can be friends.
Depends what his motive for remaining friends is.... if it's to constantly talk about the relationship and still message u all the time I'd re-think it

Just message one more time saying firstly, repayments will be made every month on x , by x method and then you want a clean break.

Then block. You are already engaging with it by posting on here what he is doing. If you are serious about ending it then do so. Who cares how he feels, he hasn't cared about your feelings for some time, if ever.

Don't respond

Oh dear you are starting to sound flattered by his attention.

If you really want shot of the no mark, owing him some money will not stop that. Set up a standing order and then block him.

This person does not treat you with any love or respect, you really owe him nothing.

You're absolutely right

I did feel a bit 'aah' at the best friend comment
Then I thought ffs if you'd treat your best friend Ike that I definitely don't want to be dating you!!!!!

So true!

A breakup is difficult even when you know you're done because your lives have become enmeshed. Mutual friends, finances etc. Plans for the future etc.
However in your case I do think the negatives are outweighing any positives in the relationship so you do need to end it. For this to be successful it needs to be a clean break. Texting, calling is just delaying the inevitable and it will get nasty.

The main thing is you are preventing yourself moving on and making a good relationship with someone else by giving headspace to this drain on your life.

He's just asked if we can remain friends The thing is, the basic premise of being friends with someone is that you like them, you are nice to them and you want them to be happy. He doesn't seem to like much about you, he is not nice to you and his behaviour would suggest he doesn't give a shit about you being happy.

I also don't think that he has any intention of walking away from your relationship. Did you start having too much fun with your DD? Did you start feeling a bit independent? I suspect his behaviour is likely to be more connected to a desire to drag you back down and make you feel miserable and dependent upon him so that you're grateful to have him forgive you for your 'showing off'. It's manipulative and a shitty thing for him to do to you.

In your position, I think I'd set up a standing order to his account so you can repay the money with no contact needed. Don't reply to any texts about the relationship. He's ended it, you agree, so no further discussion is needed. If he has a key, get your locks changed. If he has stuff at your home, either leave it at a mutual friends or have someone else at your home ready to hand it over to him. Once he realises that he's not going to be able to suck you back in again, there's every chance he could turn rather nasty, so be prepared and take every precaution.

This was my ex-husband. it is really not a good quality. So please move on with your life.

Re: the holiday money - do you have to pay- after all you wont be going, will you? Can either you or he swap someone else in?

We already went on the holiday & he paid for everything

He doesn't have anything at mine as I returned it all after the last break up. So it's just the money
I've told him I'll take the money off for the hotel.

He became very like my exh and that worries me. How am I picking the same man over and over? It's so depressing to me

How am I picking the same man over and over? I used to do this. Until it was pointed out to me that if I kept picking the same sort of men, I'd keep having the same sort of problems. I genuinely believed that each man was completely different from the last, but they really weren't. They looked completely different, they had different interests, different senses of humour, but each had the same issues, I just didn't see it. I chose to overlook red flags.

Yes he did seem completely different and yet the same
I wonder if it's me and I turn them

Chin up pal, you saw it was going nowhere and said something.