Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Need someone elses views on neighbour

77 replies

seaurchin2016 · 03/08/2017 04:18

Neighbours next door are same age as us- middle aged. He has a very bad anger management problem. At first they were sort of okay. then they starting ignoring us. Next they avoided us. Then we heard nasty one word comments over the fence. We tried to speak to them but they became aggressive and ordered us off their property- we left. the woman now peers through the curtains at us or looks at us at every opportunity and quickly closes the curtains. The man watches us when we are in the garden. We can see their profiles behind the curtains. Sometimes she stands in the window of her home and is obviously mouthing off to us. The other neighbours are friendly. We are not noisy, we go about our own business but consider others, other neighbours are fine with us. but every time we go into the garden or out in the car they are watching us. We have never seen them smile. We are not nosey and go out of our way to not look in their direction in order to keep the peace. If I do something in the garden they copy. When she does the front garden and we are going out in the car she will stand with arms folded and try to stare us out. If we stop and go towards her she quickly dashes inside the house or around the corner.
Any ideas as to what is going on with this one? It's got me beat!

OP posts:
WunWun · 04/08/2017 12:59

What are they putting out that's attracting rats?

seaurchin2016 · 04/08/2017 13:04

bird seed, scraps of food and fat balls. We don't tell them not to do it. we just let them know when rats are about because we put poison down to keep the rat population down.

OP posts:
springydaffs · 04/08/2017 13:47

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

thecatneuterer · 04/08/2017 15:03

Ah, OK. That's different then and I can see your point.

Downtheroadfirstonleft · 04/08/2017 15:44

I'd be cloyingly sweet when I saw them and then right rude words in pebbles in my garden, somewhere that they'd see from their house...

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 04/08/2017 16:32

Sounds very odd.

Maybe grin and wave next time they're staring at you?Just to see what happens if nothing else!

seaurchin2016 · 04/08/2017 18:50

Thanks for everyone's advice. It really does help because you wonder otherwise whether it is just you. It's comforting to know that other people think the same. I feel better about the situation now thanks to you all.

OP posts:
mrsharrison · 04/08/2017 18:57

My friend had similar neighbours. So she started a rumour via another neighbour that she was planning to let her house to the local authority who were crying out for landlord happy to takensure housing benefit. She said the council were desperate for private rentals for the area's single parent families. The rumour got back to the snobs next door who soon stopped their nonsense.

User02 · 04/08/2017 21:28

Their conduct is very strange. It could be MH issues. Or it might be a control issue. Some people dont like children, older people, etc
If you have animals I would worry about letting them out as the strange neighbours could be lacing the food with all sorts. Had one neighbour who did that.

I dont understand what people get from being such horrible neighbours.

Tofutti · 04/08/2017 22:42

And the foxes/cats will almost certainly eat all the food, so that won't attract rats, and foxes/cats hunt rats.

We had to stop leaving leftover rice and bread for birds because it started to attract rats. Have to keep the back door closed all the time.

LexieLulu · 04/08/2017 23:01

Can you report it to your council pest control. Ours costs £55 for two visits, they will lay traps and discover cause. They will then discuss with neighbours on your behalf?

seaurchin2016 · 05/08/2017 00:09

I reported it to the council many years ago. They came out, looked over the fence into next door's saw the food and said that's the problem. They went and spoke to our neighbours. The council then set traps but said that food should not be left out not even bird seed because the rats will come back. This happened years ago. Since then, I have seen a rat climb the fence. At first I thought it was a squirrel but when I looked closer it was a rat. I didn't know they could climb! Holes have been chewed along the lower part of the fence panels and our neighbours blamed us for damaging the fence. We try to keep the peace by being nice and not accusing them at all. We can't enjoy our own garden. The furries have made tunnels which are full of seed and food. This happened years ago. We still have the furries. Our neighbour carried on talking to us for a few years but now they have gone totally odd.

OP posts:
CockacidalManiac · 05/08/2017 00:39

Some people are just odd, and being in a couple with another weirdo compounds their oddness.
I wouldn't engage with them at all.

tallwivglasses · 05/08/2017 00:41

I think I would have to move. I have lovely neighbours and it really makes a difference. You have to feel comfortable and safe in your own home.

Catinthecorner · 05/08/2017 00:47

Sabine I think you're the bad neighbour in that situation actually.

seaurchin2016 · 05/08/2017 01:14

Am I the bad neighbour?

OP posts:
TheRat · 05/08/2017 08:12

If you came to tell me off about feeding foxes/stray cats I wouldn't take it well either

Really?

I had to have this discussion with my neighbours because my cat was on a special diet and every time she ate food they left out she would get very ill. The medicated food we were giving her was not as tasty as the food they were letting her have so she wouldn't eat it. And the non-medicated food made her ill.

They stopped for a while after I asked but then started leaving food out again. This led to get being put down in the end.

I wonder if my neighbours thought I was being unreasonable to ask.

seaurchin2016 · 05/08/2017 09:37

Your poor cat. What a terrible thing to happen just because your neighbours are so determined to do what they want no matter how it affects others.

OP posts:
SabineUndine · 05/08/2017 13:52

Catinthecorner you can think what you like, I didn't ask for your opinion. I apologised to the neighbour, said they had a litter tray indoors which they had, and did not complain about them throwing cat poo back over my wall. I'm not sure what you think I can do about this? Put nappies on the cats? In law, cats have freedom to come and go and they want.

seaurchin2016 · 06/08/2017 01:18

I'm sorry if me starting this thread has caused upset. I just wanted to know other people's views so that I could see both sides of the story. Sometimes its hard to put yourself in someone else's shoes. I just wanted to know if my neighbour's behaviour was considered strange by others. Thanks to all those who have posted. It has helped me to get my head around the problem. I now realise that my problem isn't as bad as some people's. Thanks again.

OP posts:
MinnieSprinkles · 06/08/2017 04:45

They are nothing more than negative parasites who are mierable with their own existance so try and drain everyone elses energy to mske you miserable like them

I have a neighbor like this aswell i just ignore

IdentifiesAsYoda · 06/08/2017 06:06

They sound strange

Sarikiz · 06/08/2017 06:22

I have lived next door to weird neighbours for the past thirteen years.
They are weird with all the the neighbours. They stand and stare constantly. She is permanently in the kitchen window.
These neighbours have caused no end of problems. A land dispute with the neighbour opposite, which they lost.
Two neighbours were called in for questioning by the police when the weirdos found a mark on their BMW.
I received threatening notes about my gate which has been up for 25 years.
They dont play loud music but are up and about at all hours they have 4 cameras and eight outside lights on their detached house.

The list of their strange behaviour is endless.
They have very few visitors and all of the neighbours ignore them. We certainly dont smile and wave.
None so queer as folk.

seaurchin2016 · 06/08/2017 12:42

Sarikiz - your neighbours sound just like mine and they drive a BMW like mine ! Are they middle aged? Do they have children? I'm thinking maybe its an age thing.

OP posts:
Sarikiz · 06/08/2017 13:58

My neighbours are middle aged (in their 50s) no children.
He has thrown dead geese into my garden!
He has tipped rubbish on another neighbours garden at 4am when walking their anti social Doberman dog. Who made it anti social ? He did. He would goad the dog
Saying "go on my son" then when the dog sprang forward yank it back on the lead. Awful.
The top four panels of fencing were falling down and rotting they would not repair the fence( their responsibility) I was worried my dog would get put and meet their doberman
I said I would pay and replace the fence. She called the police on me who warned me about criminal damage !!!
We ended up going to.mediation at their insurance companies insistence and they had to pay £150 for a new fence and £400 costs Mediation for a fence!

Swipe left for the next trending thread