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Original poster

Messaging new guy

73 replies

Fireandflames666 · 18/06/2017 16:41

I met someone at an event two weeks ago and we've been in contact everyday since. However I've only been with one person prior to this (thirteen year relationship) and I'm finding it hard to work out whether he's interested as a friend or otherwise.

A fair few nights we've messaged in to the early hours talking about life, our issues and previous relationships. He messages me with problems asking for advice as well.

He's mentioned after a drink that he'd like to meet up, that I've a cute voice, that I'm attractive etc. But he hasn't asked any other time so i haven't pushed the point.

Help!?

OP posts:
donners312 · 18/06/2017 17:14

Well obviously he likes you. How exciting!

TheNaze73 · 18/06/2017 17:16

Ask him?

PollyPerky · 18/06/2017 18:11

So when he mentioned he'd like to meet for a drink, what did you say?

If you didn't say' that would be lovely, when were you thinking of?' he will think you are not interested.

So you have only ever had one boyfriend in your life?
How old are you now if i can ask?

WithCheesePlease · 18/06/2017 18:16

Any guy who texts every day and compliments you is definitely interested! He might just be shy (as you said he only says it after a drink).. I think you'd be safe enough to suggest it yourself and he'd be delighted!

ladystarkers · 18/06/2017 18:20

Its a goer

PollyPerky · 18/06/2017 18:21

sorry I thought you meant he'd asked you out for a drink.

How do you know he'd had a drink - was this over the phone and he said he'd been drinking?

I think you will only find out by meeting up. But I'm slightly worried he's using you as a kind of Samaritan the way he talks about all his problems and wants advice. Does he listen to you and your issues too or is it all about him?

AutumnRose1988 · 18/06/2017 18:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 18/06/2017 23:40

I'm 31.

He was sending voice recordings so i knew he was drunk, lol. When he asked about a drink i said it'd be lovely, but i didn't ask when....whoops.

He listens to my problems as well. I. Don't think he's using me to vent, seems odd to do that everyday when be has hundreds of friends to vent at.

OP posts:
cakecakecheese · 19/06/2017 13:33

The event you met at, is there anything similar coming up that you could say you were thinking of going to and does he want to come with you?

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 19/06/2017 20:27

It was a cosplay event and there are many others. I'll have a look when the next one is... It's not a cheap hobby, lol.

OP posts:
Imbeingunreasonable · 19/06/2017 23:38

For a start you both have a shared hobby so that helps massively Grin

It's definitely a goer! Go for it op, after the next event hit the nearest pub or somewhere you can relax and just see what happens.

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 22/06/2017 08:09

Well, the messaging is still going strong. Keeps sending me photos/videos of his cosplay and asking me what i think, Messaging me first, and he called me attractive Blush. Still not asked each other out yet..... Lol. Must both be shy.

OP posts:
Imbeingunreasonable · 22/06/2017 11:02

Aww please go for for it Fire. Cosplay is awesome and the fact you both love it is a huge bonus. This 'friendship' definitely has wings. Do you fancy him?

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 22/06/2017 12:31

Yeah i do fancy him, but I'm wary as my previous relationship ended badly and i have two young children as well. It's making me nervous, lol.

Also I don't want to ask him as I'm terrified of the response good or bad, lol. In fact how would i go about asking him out, never asked someone out before.

OP posts:
Imbeingunreasonable · 22/06/2017 14:34

I can understand your apprehension considering your last relationship turning out badly, plus not wanting to do anything that would effect your kids.

You could always make it super casual. Kind of like, 'Hey, if you're free after x cosplay event, do you fancy meeting up at the cafe/pub/wherever afterwards?'. As in try not to make it formally a date, so it can just be construed as two friends hanging out. Then see where it leads from there. He may think of it as a date, he may not but it's open to suggestion and puts no pressure on either of you.

And above all, keep it fun 😊 Eeek I'm excited for you 😁

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 22/06/2017 14:46

Haha, yeah I'll try that. I happy with casual for now 😊. He's bloody gorgeous (both personality and looks) though, it's hard to speak in person 😂.

OP posts:
Imbeingunreasonable · 22/06/2017 16:45

Bless you OP. I'm getting pretty envious now haha 😜 Sounds like you're on to a good thing anyway. Just take it slowly, keep it fun and have lots of banter along the way. You'll soon find out if he likes you like that (I think reading your first post it's obvious though Wink)

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 22/06/2017 19:50

I hope so, can almost feel myself falling.... But that's not allowed! 😉😁.

OP posts:
Imbeingunreasonable · 22/06/2017 19:54

Haha just play it cool for now. This is my favourite thread at the mo because it's just so cute. Let me know how you get on. And yes, definitely ask him for a drink

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 22/06/2017 20:03

I know, i know... I'm cool... My brain can shut up for now, lol.

Haha, we'll see what happens. Will definitely keep you posted, lol.

OP posts:
Imbeingunreasonable · 22/06/2017 20:46

Good luck! 👍🏼😁

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 23/06/2017 02:32

So just asked him about "that drink" he asked for the other day. I'm waiting on a response, I'm nervous as..

My bets in now £100 on NO.

OP posts:
Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 23/06/2017 02:40

#denied Told you :(

"Aww I'd like to but as I say I'm a flirt when drunk and would probably just get myself in trouble haha"

OP posts:
PeachPearPotato · 23/06/2017 03:17

What a bizarre reply Sad

I think I'd try and cool things down fairly quickly.

SnowiestMountain · 23/06/2017 03:23

Well that's weird, I suspect he's not actually single, it take it to be the end of that flirtation Sad