Background is best friend and I known each other 13 years, since uni and moved around various cities for love and work. Fast forward and for the last three years we have both been since and in the same city.
We've been really close, it's been great. Done a lot together, shared a lot together; hopes, fears the usual.
Never any issues in the relationship until recently.
At the beginning of the year we both shared large birthdays within 6 weeks of one another, and the decision was to celebrate through a city break abroad. The plan had been cemented, time off work booked etc. She was non committal as the time grew closer and in the end said she couldn't afford it, fair enough. I was upset as I wanted to head away and her late admission (selfishly) left me short. My other friend in seeing my hurt and eagerness to go away went with me.
To my surprise (and quite honestly, astonishment) whilst I was away, best friend booked a May holiday away with her other friend, quite a holiday at that, and one that required immediate payment?? I said nothing, but was hurt.
In the intervening time between now and then things were different, she often 'forgot' to text back, took forever about it, etc. Sometimes I felt like she enjoyed having the upper hand, me running to her.
Then there was a dinner party where she got blind drunk, came onto a guy who said he was interested, but only for a night. Went on to chat to him, publicly shouted at me when I chatted to him at said dinner party, but went home regardless with him. When he didn't get in contact she took drastic measures to get over him (!), platinum blonde hair, cut all short :s What can I even say to that!
Now, onto the crux of the matter. Her parents have a large place that we holiday at (abroad). We have been before (last year) and planned to revisit at a reasonable time for flights, and when we could both afford to (I was beholden to her there). We agree September. Time is duly booked off work once we see great flight prices etc.
Then she suggests her other friend come. I have met this lady for 3 hours in my life, and we probably didn't get on like a house on fire. I said it probably not the best idea spending 10 days away together, threes a crowd et al. She said yeah, fair enough, it's just I mentioned it to her too.
One week later I get a random text which starts 'also, I mentioned it to X, and she's really up for it so sorry, but as i mentioned it to her first I'm going to have to go with her'. Now I'm shocked at both the contact and delivery of this. I choose not to reply as really, what can I say?!
She chases with another text (ironic given her comms of late), suggesting I'm pissed off with her. I say yes, I am and I didn't know what to say, that twice it's happened, the delivery was uncouth and as a supposed best friend I feel pretty undervalued, but moreover, I'm very hurt.
She replies let's meet up when I'm back from holiday (this is the May holiday, and over 2 weeks away?!). I say I think it better to speak before then. We have a telephone conversation where she proports to understand (but going ahead regardless) and suggests: we go on a mega holiday next year. I think this is just to appease me, and if I'm honest I don't want the tokenism and can't help but feel the relationship, or certainly the way I feel, has very much changed.
I hear nothing more from her in the intervening period, other than a text at airport that she's having a drink and it made her think of me (other friend thought that sentiment was a bit of a kick in the teeth).
I hear nothing more from her, almost 2 weeks pass. Very hurt by now.
Now to the present. We had a diary invite scheduled through for a forthcoming event. Randomly I receive a 'decline'. I reply suggesting that's a pity and is she back from holiday. She says yes, was just clearing up diary. I play it politely, asking if she still fancied it and that we should catch up, it's been over a month.
Replying a day later she says yes, it has. She's had such a brilliant weekend (don't know if this is relevant, but she's posted all over social media which she never does, pics of her with other people, very attention seeking, look at me having such a good time). She goes on to say she's very busy and says not free until X.
I suggest that will be almost two months since we have seen each other and it says it all. Ok, maybe I shouldn't have said it like that. But I am incredulous. She replied 'says what'. I've not replied. Been almost a week.
I'm so god damn hurt at her. That's it. Isn't it? She doesn't value me at all and I don't deserve this. I just wish it didn't hurt so much, I swear it's like a bad relationship has ended, and more hurtful given what we've shared.
Have I done the right thing?