Have nMechanged as people who know me irl may recognise me.
Been with dh nearly 20 years. Have a 17yo dc.
I was early 20s when we got together, dh 15 years older than me. Quite a whirlwind romance and I was fairly quickly pregnant and then married.
For the last 15years dh has pretty much lived As a single person. As in he never, ever wants to do anything with me. He hasn't come on holiday with me and dd since she was 2yo. No days out, trips away.
I've had to do everything on my own with Dd, holidays, going to the zoo, etc. He says it's boring. He has a hobby which takes up all weekends in the spring, summer, early autumn.
If the weather is too bad for his hobby he sits on his computer and ignores me.
He never takes me out, we don't go to the cinema, dinner, nothing.
As Dd has got older it's got easier for me. She's off with her friends and I have got my own friends, interests, become increasingly independent. Been fairly happy. Dh earns a decent wage and I guess one reason I stayed is the thought of splitting up from a financial POV doesn't appeal. Easier to stay, comfortable, I get on with my own stuff.
Dh always has a few holidays every year with friends, all to do with this hobby/sport. It's not cycling btw! 
He earns 3x. More than I do and can afford holidays. Although he pays the bills he keeps his money separate and me and Dd. Had to have camping holidays as that's all I could afford even though his holidays are all abroad.
He went on holiday last month with a friend and forgot to tell me! I was furious. Went for a week. Then last weekend I reminded him I was out one day this week and he said he wouldn't be here as he was going on holiday again the following day! I'm furious.
In the past I think I would have been furious but just carried on, thinking he's a wanker, etc but not rocking the boat.
I always thought no point in splitting up as I have no interest in trying to find love elsewhere........
However I've kind of met someone. Nothing has happened. But there is a spark and I think it's very mutual. He's friend requested me on fb and he's just lovely.
I don't want to have an affair. But now it's like I've woken up to the possibility that actually maybe there is hope that I could have a normal/decent relationship with someone. But if it wasn't for the thought of that I would put up with dh. So now I don't know what to do. Dh is still away. Do I tell him when he gets back I've had enough? This thing with this other guy may come to nothing.......and then I could be alone and skint. Whereas I may be. Alone now but don't have money worries.
We would have to sell the house and I would get about 70k as my half of the equity......which is nothing! Plus I have a decent final salary pension scheme and dh doesn't have a pension and I'm worried he could take half of it.