Loss of Intimacy

[user1487166445]

I’m a 41 year old man and my wife is mid 30’s. We’ve known each other for 7 years and got married a couple of years ago. We have a wonderful 4 year old daughter.
I love my wife dearly and fancy her big time. She has an amazing body and up until my wife became pregnant we had an awesome sex life. However, for the past 4 plus years, things have been different. Priorities changed. I’m not sure if it all happened at once or not but my wife no longer offers much intimacy. I haven’t been given oral sex for 4 years and she doesn’t allow me to touch her breasts or her vagina. I get to kiss her on the cheek only. We have penetrative sex every second Saturday of the month and, since sex is so infrequent, I usually climax as soon as I enter her. She gets herself off using a vibrator before we do have sex. I think the vibrator gets used at other times too when she is on her own.
I would frequently masturbate alone. This became such a lonely and empty thing and so I refrained from wanking as much as I could, going for 3-4 weeks at a time without ejaculating. The intense frustration was matched by a devotion to my wife and I also developed a desire to be dominated, stemming, I believe, from a lack of intimacy and the infrequency of sex.
When we go to bed each night I want to be able to touch and kiss my wife but she reads or uses the internet and I go to sleep while rubbing her feet or her legs. I’m allowed to hug her once she has finished reading.
I’ve done all the obvious things like doing my share of domestic chores, childcare, buying flowers etc but, to no avail. Whenever I’ll raised the subject of intimacy she gets angry.
I want her to feel desire and to want intimacy but don’t know what to do. Pease help!
Thanks.

[rosabug]

Watch this - it's very interesting. I think you need to focus on yourself and give her some room, but at some point have a firm talk. Her behaviour is lazy and selfish but there might be other reasons involved. All i know is that when this happened in my relationship I wish had seen this video and acted differently. My panic and neediness made it worse.

[Jiggaminny]

Great video rosabug!

[Stewart2017]

Thanks for sharing video.

Once you get used to the accent.... it's interesting.