Would you ever have your ILs/parents live with you?

[Lovelilies]

DP and I have been through a rough time and are in negotiations about living together again. We have 2 DC together and I have an older DD.
Recently his parents have been ill, nothing life threatening. He has been up and down to London (500 mile trip) quite a lot to see them. I can live with this (just) but he wants them to come and live with us/him when they become older and more in need of help.
FWIW, the ILs and I have a 'civil' relationship. They hardly speak to me and speak only in their native tongue with DP even when I'm around. I'd gladly never see them again as I really don't care for them, but will grin and bear it for short periods for the sake of DP and DC.
I understand that in their culture parents are looked after, and if we had some sort of relationship I may consider it, but as it stands my priority is these DC and DP.
So, he thinks I'm cruel that I would 'see them in a home' but there is no way on this earth I ever want them living with us!
What's the solution here?!

[Lovelilies]

Thank you all, the support from random people on the internet really does help me... especially at night, when I have no one IRL to talk to

[annandale]

Next street, in a heartbeat, in fact I wish they would.

Same street, I'd think twice. I don't want to walk past their windows and get knocked at when I need to get into town/a bit of peace.

Same house, never, ever.

[Ohdearducks]

No, no, no. That goes for any of our relations though not just PIL.

[MrDacresEUSubsidy]

He goes on about it's because we don't live together bla bla, if that's how you feel lovelilies, we may as well call it a day, he says how his parents are now referring to me as 'their DIL' and all nice things, they're trying to be more chatty etc

Just bin him, he sounds incredibly manipulative. What he wants is to move back in with you and then have you running round after his parents as well. Marriage is a promise and a commitment - not a carrot on a stick. Yet it's amazing how the prospect of marriage suddenly gets thrown about when men like this sense that you are having second thoughts and thinking about pulling away from them.

Call his bluff - really, do. One of two things will be the outcome:

• He backtracks incredibly fucking fast because the prospect of not being able to move back in with you AND looking after his parents won't appeal. In which case no parents, but you will need to have a long and hard think about what this relationship is really giving you.
  
• Or he'll say 'OK, let's split up', in which case you have had a lucky escape from an emotional blackmailing twat.
  

Either way you'll be happier long term than you are now, where you are being pressured and he is trying to manipulate you and push you into agreeing something that is not in yours - or your DCs - best interests.

[ForalltheSaints]

No, and they would never consider it.