My first post on here but I really needs other mum's/ wives perspectives on my situation.
I have 3 children, DS1 is 4, DD is 1 1/2 and DS2 is 5months old. I love my husband with all my heart but he is a self confessed, mummy's boy and narcissist with an awful temper. He is currently waiting for a second referral to see a psychiatrist as he ignored the letters for his first after taking himself to the doctor to ask for help? I have forgiven him physical attacks on me, death threats, verbal attacks on my appearance/morals/parenting skills. He constantly runs to his mum's house during/after arguments and most recently on Boxing Day he walked out and left me with our kids for 2 days without so much as a txt. But now he is starting to sometimes completely disregard the kids needs and I'm struggling with it.
We are supposed to be moving house in 2 weeks to a new village about 20mins away but my eldest has had to start at his new school there already as they gave me no other option than to take him from the start of this term. My husband is off work in till the 9th and has been driving me there as I cannot drive myself. My baby is on prescription milk for dietary requirements and Infant Gaviscon for reflux so is prone to constipation/dihorrea, boughts of unexplained crying etc and at the moment isn't eating or sleeping well. My MIL phones this morning saying my husbands Nan had been ill during the night so my husband said he'd pop in on the way home from the school as they live a lot closer than we do. I changed DD2's dirty nappy just before we left for the school run but on the way he decided to make another and was getting upset for a bottle, DD was also due a nap. My husband knew this but carried on to his mums anyway and I asked him twice on the way there to please be as quick as possible as I needed to get the children home. We arrive and goes in and I'm left with a screaming baby and a distressed toddler until he wanders out over 15mins later chewing wine gums! He helped me wrestle DD back into her car seat and we spent half the journey home listening to the children scream until I ask him why he ignored what I'd asked him about being quick for the kids sake. He said that 15mins wasn't that long and his Nan was sick so it was just tough and I'm only moaning because I couldn't cope with them. I tried to explain that they are children and their needs have to come first and he could have taken us home and gone to his mums after but he seems to think that I'm being unreasonable and a f-ing bitch as he put it. This then blew into a full blown argument resulting in him calling me fat, bad parent, disgusting, psycho you name it and again...storming off to his mums house telling me he wants nothing more to do with and that I'm a deluded idiot. I love this man and I know he needs help but surely this is just him being horrible? Am I being unreasonable because it's happening so often is just don't know anymore? I feel like it's me that's the problem and I'm overreacting but I just don't want my babies to be put in a position where they're are distressed when it could be prevented. Advice would be greatly appreciated.