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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Keeping my name and title

63 replies

butterfly92 · 15/12/2016 21:16

If i get married can i still call myself miss instead of mrs and keep it on all important documents and paperwork? Cos i want to keep my surname as well

OP posts:
Softkitty2 · 15/12/2016 21:19

I think its more appropriate to be a Ms when you are married but do not want to disclose the fact.

So it will be Ms your surname

AgainPlease · 15/12/2016 21:23

Traditionally 'Miss' is used for unmarried young ladies.

Ms is more appropriate.

... Yah my mum put my through years of etiquette lessons Blush

AliceInHinterland · 15/12/2016 21:26

You can use Miss if you like, your title is not legally part of your name.
here
I'm not sure what you mean by more appropriate Softkitty, men do not reveal their marital status in their title, why should women if they prefer not to?
As an aside, I'm assuming you're born in 1992 - are you sure you're allowed to get married?! That makes me feel very old (eighties child here, like to think I'm still early twenties).

CelticPromise · 15/12/2016 21:28

You can call yourself whatever you choose.

CMOTDibbler · 15/12/2016 21:28

Of course you can use whatever honorative you want!

AliceInHinterland · 15/12/2016 21:29

I'm assuming the OP knows what 'Miss' is traditionally used for, apologies if I've misunderstood (no pun intended) and she is genuinely asking for advice on what it means.

2cats2many · 15/12/2016 21:29

You can call yourself what you want. I vary between Miss and Ms all the time.

RedMapleLeaf · 15/12/2016 21:31

Yes, you can use any title you like. I prefer no title but if forced I use Ms. I am unmarried.

EllaHen · 15/12/2016 21:31

I am Ms Myname. A lot of companies address me as Miss though as I did sweet FA to change it. Much prefer Miss to Mrs anyway.

Blacksox · 15/12/2016 21:33

My friend is a Ms but gets frustrated that people think she's divorced or, in a couple of cases, a lesbian!

dontcallmethatyoucunt · 15/12/2016 21:34

I randomly use miss or ms maiden name

PoldarksBreeches · 15/12/2016 21:35

Of course you can. I happen to think that Ms is more appropriate for a woman whether married or not as Miss is for girls IMO but you can keep Miss if you like it.

DrSeuss · 15/12/2016 21:36

It's 2016. How are we even still having this conversation? Call yourself Miss/Ms/Mrs Any Surname. I didn't change my name when I married in 1997 and it was far less common then. People mostly just dealt with it although my MIL was less than thrilled.

EdithWeston · 15/12/2016 21:37

I never changed my name, and have used Ms since my late teens (ie before and after marriage)

I find most people and organisations have no problem whatsoever with this.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 15/12/2016 21:38

You can call yourself what you like.

qumquat · 15/12/2016 21:54

As others have said call yourself whatever you like! I alternate pretty freely between Miss and Ms and would do the same if I were married.

Doik · 15/12/2016 21:56

I changed my surname but remained Miss.

FaFoutis · 15/12/2016 21:57

Call yourself what you like. You'll still get Christmas cards addressed to Mr and Mrs Husband'sfirstname Husband'ssurname.

3 this week. The fuckers.

BratFarrarsPony · 15/12/2016 21:59

of course you can! It is your name after all.

celtiethree · 15/12/2016 22:03

Plus Christmas cheque in your married name, and personalised gifts from 'not on the high street' in your family name!!!

BrassicaBabe · 15/12/2016 22:05

I've had a heap of stuff recently addressed to mr & mrs . It makes me stand on a soap box each and every time.

And, yes, I know the etiquette background and that Mrs means I'm widowed. But feck we need to recognise that HRH Victoria is dead and move forwards. SiL - I'm looking at you!!!!

FaFoutis · 15/12/2016 22:23

I'm bloody DR. Never ever Mrs. You could probably tell by looking at me that my name is not Richard, or David, or Jeremy.

Lorelei76 · 15/12/2016 22:28

Of course you can but why not Ms? It's the equivalent of Mr. The more women use it, the less likely we are to be filed by marital status, which I think is what you're aiming for?

FaFoutis · 15/12/2016 22:29

Ms means divorced to me. You are right though, if more women use it that association will be lost.

BratFarrarsPony · 15/12/2016 22:31

well that is quite a dated and mistaken association anyway to be honest FaFoutis.

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