I am SO inexperienced...

[amammabear]

My husband left me a few months ago. Having been with him four years and years, and having never had any other relationships at all, I am ridiculously inexperienced, so I could do with some advice, even though I know this makes me sound ridiculously childish.

There is a guy, a really great guy, and I've fallen for him. But now I don't know what to do with myself at all. I'm terrified that if I say something to him about my feelings, he'll distance himself from me or pity me, and while we're not close friends, I can't bear the thought of losing his friendship. Yet at the same time, what if by not saying something I'm missing out on what could've been something great?

How should I approach this? Is there any possible way to handle this without messing things up?

Sorry for sounding likea silly teenager, but despite being much older, this is all completely new.

Yeah, not even acknowledging my existence now so I think we can knock that on the head. I've learnt a lot about people this week.

Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that . Are you ok?

Not really, but I'll survive I suppose, thank you xxx

Bloody hell, bear, I'm sorry to hear that. Sounds like you've had a lucky escape - he mustn't be the man you thought he was. Hope you're feeling OK.

That's not very nice to not reply to your text. He could have at least said something out of politeness even if he didn't want to meet you for coffee.

I must've gone too far with it. I wouldn't mind so much about him not being interested, but I've tried to be so supportive to him and our other friends, but it seems they don't want to support me when I need it.

You mean you "went too far" by asking him for a coffee? That's not you going too far - if nobody even dared to make a first step that tiny the human race would go extinct - that's him making something far more awkward than it has to be. All he had to do was say he was busy and you'd have got the idea. Complete radio silence might have been necessary if you'd really flung yourself at him, but it is overkill here. He is obviously pretty clueless about interpersonal relationships.

As you know where you are now, all that is left to do is take some subtle steps back and make out that all is fine, you didn't take it seriously / maybe didn't even mean it that way. Give him the look of a mildly concerned auntie and ask if everything is OK, as you haven't heard from him.

you didn't go to far - unfortunately, he wasn't worth it. I agree with ravenmum in all points, you made it so easy for him to show politely that he wasn't interested and he's chosen to behave like a wally, you've hardly stalked him in beachwear. Probably a lucky escape really op, don't let this put you off from dating or asking people out down the line.

"Stalked un beach wear" lol!!!