Do you ever call your OH on their work landline?

[RingOfFire79]

So, this is an etiquette question mostly - I know it's tiny but it's been bugging me and I would like to know what others do (I'm a serious relationship newbie).

Occasionally I will need to speak to my partner while he's at work. I'll try him on his mobile but sometimes it's on silent and it's in his pocket. I'll then send a text asking him to call back and wait. Only if it's urgent, I have sometimes then rung his office landline and said - if he picks up - "hi, are you ok to talk? If so, can you ring me back on your mobile please?" That's it - we never have personal conversations on his landline. If he doesn't pick up, I just leave it and wait for him to ring me back.

Do you think this is ok? What do others do? I don't want to pester him at work (my ex sister-in-law used to ring my brother's secretary 20 times a day and shout at her when she couldn't be put through) but sometimes I do need to speak to him about an urgent/important matter.

This is my first serious relationship with someone in quite a while and I've forgotten what to do/what is reasonable! (Mum quite often rings me on my work landline about really, really random, non-urgent/important stuff and I don't really think that's appropriate but I love her and she's lovely (and my boss' wife does it to him lots) so it's ok )

Only ever called his work landline once and that was to tell him his dad was in hospital

Husband has never called me on my work landline

Never. I'll leave a message on his mobile if I can't wait until I see him in the evening for a response.

PS - voicemail definitely exists.

No he doesn't have one! He refused on the basis that anyone who doesn't have his mobile number isn't worth speaking to anyway. He doesn't know mine. Either I'm teaching and so won't be in my office and can't be contacted or I'll have my mobile near me and I have an Apple Watch so i'll know he's rung even if it's on silent

We don't live together and I'm often busy in the evenings with work (the nature of my job).

Also, I know literally (I use that word advisedly) no-one apart from my mum who leaves voicemail (not even my OH). Instead it's a call and a follow-on text. I'm a millennial so maybe it's a generational thing? (I think that the average age of MN-ers may be a little older? Given what I've seen from other messages and it appears that most on here have children etc.) Interesting to hear other people use voicemail though!

I don't. If it's urgent I'll call his mobile, if it's not I'll send a SMS. My DP works in a really informal office so it wouldn't be an issue, but the people he works with are nosey and I don't want them listening in to our private conversations.

There's a woman in my office whose husband frequently calls her to continue an argument from the night before!

We don't live together and I'm often busy in the evenings with work (the nature of my job).

It's the nature of most jobs, including your OH's I imagine

No, he's never in his offices anyway. In an emergency I could get switch board to track him down for me. I never ring his mobile anymore either. He once had someone put me on speaker when he was in surgery and I unwittingly told about 12 people I needed the green tampax not the yellow on his way home.

Actually ring I kind of agree with you about voicemails. Apart from stuff like doctor/dentist the only person who would leave me voicemails or I would leave one for is my mum. I'd just text anyone else.

DH and I both have direct work phones and usually one or other will call the other once a day for normal family stuff. He's up and away to work very early in the morning so I can't remind him off things I need him to do then ( he's got the memory of a goldfish so if I tell him the night before he always forgets). He never reads texts and if I leave him a voicemail on his mobile he phones me rather than listening to it neither of our offices mind and actually frown more on personal emails than personal calls

If I need to, yes. He never seems to answer it though!

DH has a habit of putting his mobile on divert to his office phone, so I have inadvertently phoned it several times. It's usually then answered by someone else in his office, so I then feel a plonker as I have to say "no, you can't help me, it's X's wife!

Never. I wouldn't unless it was an emergency.

He rings me on his lunch tho

Wouldn't dream of it. I'd leave a message or text if it was an emergency but, work phones are for work I think.

This has been very helpful, so thank you - it is much appreciated.

I'd only use his work number if it was really urgent.

I don't but as others have said, I never have any issue that is that urgent. The 3 times I have called were labour, DC taken to hospital and me being admitted to hospital. Anything less than that and he'll get a whatsapp.

Only if he isn't answering his mobile and I need to speak to him urgently - I think twice with an ill child needing collecting (nursery had called me but he was closer) and once when the cat had collapsed and needed rushing to the vet (neighbour had called me but I was 2 hours away).

I phone my husband at work as he has no reception on his mobile and he has it on silent at work anyway. I don't just phone for a chat but if I need to speak to him it's fine.

Never and never would unless an absolute emergency.

I wouldn't know what my DHs work number is. Id only call him in work time on his mobile if it were a genuine emergency (ie a close family member being hospitalised and needing one or both of us).

I also don't do voicemail....

DH doesn't even know the number for his landline to give to me . I normally call his mobile. If he has no signal and it's really urgent, then I email.

He does come home at lunch though (I WFH) so normally it waits till then/end of the day.

Totally agree re voicemails btw. Also a millenial and cannot tell you the last time I left a VM or received one. I find them really inconvenient. I couldn't even tell you what I need to dial to retrieve it.

Occasionally, yes, but I know he is in his own office so not public.

I would usually email him during the day about this and that but do call if I need an immediate answer to something important like what does he want for dinner when I am in supermarket

Never in 7 years!

I wouldn't only do it in an emergency, I've done it from time to time and there's no issue. Him calling mine also fine.

Yes I call dh on his work direct number. He doesn't see clients in his office, so less chance of disturbing him if with a client than if on his mobile. He also prefers that option. Doesn't have to be urgent - just sometimes a quick catch up or reminder. He works Latisha so not home til after 7, so sometimes to get him to bring things in from shops on way home etc.

He calls me from his land line at work, it to my mobile. I don't have a direct line. I am less accessible as can't have phone on in classroom but he will leave a message and I'll call him back, or he tries to remember to call out of school core hours.