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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

He hit me last night.. I don't know what to do!!

84 replies

ReachingOut27 · 18/09/2016 13:12

Last night he came home pretty drunk..
We argue alot and he can be verbally abusive but he's never hurt me.
I'm 33 weeks pregnant and I have 3 children from a previous relationship but they were at their dads thankfully.
I had an arguing with him about how I'm always alone because I'm supposed to be resting and he's always out.

He came in and came I upstairs.. Took his belt off and threw it at me.
He then took my phone from my hands and accused me of cheating.

He told me to delete all our mutual friends from Facebook or he would.
I tried to get my phone back and then he smacked me across the face.
Out of shock I smacked him back it was the wrong thing to do I know but i automatically went to defend myself.

The all clear of a sudden he punched in the cheek and cracked my head against the wall. Some how I ended up with the phone but it had died so I couldn't contact anyone.
I ran to the bathroom and tried to shut the door. He came in hurling abuse agian backing me into the shower where it came on and i ended up soaked.
He called me things like "fat slag"
Told he was going to look up one of his exs that puts me to shame and for a full hour followed me round making threats about how he would have the baby taken away from me ect. I was horrified and I'm still shaking not believing what's actually happened.
I'm terrified to tell anyone.
I'm terrified of being alone.
I don't know what to do.

I slept in my childrens room last night when he eventually went to sleep and when I woke up this morning he said.
I can't believe you smacked me last night look at the scratch on my face.

My face is currently swollen and sore to touch.
When I tried telling him what he'd done his answer was we are both as bad as each other.
Told me I pushed the argument by just not letting him have his "me time"
In this whole pregnancy I've been left at home alone because I've been ill and we've done nothing together.

He goes out every weekend.

He then got ready went out and has gone to play football like nothing has happened.

He has told me I'd have to have him physically removed for him to leave.
Im scared of doing that.
He tells me that it's unfair if I make him go and miss out on his unborn child.
I don't know what to do
Is this my fault?
Did I start this.
How do I find strength when I'm already ill and weak.

OP posts:
ddrmum · 18/09/2016 18:06

Another one to hold your hand & echo all previous posters. This will only get worse. Call the police - they'll know exactly what to do. If possible have someone with you for support. As with many others, I've been here too with 3DC. If you are not safe, they & your unborn child will not be safe. Please pick up the phone. Stay safe

Memoires · 18/09/2016 18:49

Please please please call the police. It's part of their responsibility to find out where he is, you don't have to know, it doesn't matter.

Call Women's Aid too.

I'm so sorry he has done this to you, and no, it's not your fault, it's not your shame.

Call the police pleeeeease.

leaveittothediva · 18/09/2016 19:28

Please get the courage from somewhere to to pick up your mobile and dial the police right away. Have you any family member you can call to come over to wait with you.?. You are in shock, you also need to see a doctor. Get a photograph of your face, and any other injuries sustained, and press charges against him. This relationship is now over, he's crossed the line, please don't wait until you have a baby in your arms before he gives you another punch in the face. If you feel you can't do this for you, then change your thinking and do it for your baby. He is an abuser, see him as that. You can do this.

RepentAtLeisure · 18/09/2016 20:01

I hope you called the police OP.

honeyrider · 18/09/2016 21:51

I hope you got medical attention and had it reported to the police OP.

beanaseireann · 29/10/2018 09:14

OP I hope you and your baby are ok.

PuddinginPerth · 29/10/2018 14:08

Call the Police. You hit him back because it was an automatic (self protection) reaction to being assaulted.

His first slap and his subsequent punch was assault. How is he going to be wanting his “me time” after the baby is born??

He hasn’t even apologised. He thinks it was your fault.

You’re heavily pregnant and he assaulted you and called you a fat slag.

You need to pick up the phone and call the Police.

WhiteVixen · 29/10/2018 14:12

Zombie thread!

Hopefully the OP did contact the police two years ago and is no longer with this piece of shit excuse for a man...

PuddinginPerth · 29/10/2018 14:14

Just realised this was from 2016 - what did you do?

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