He hit me last night.. I don't know what to do!!

[ReachingOut27]

Last night he came home pretty drunk..
We argue alot and he can be verbally abusive but he's never hurt me.
I'm 33 weeks pregnant and I have 3 children from a previous relationship but they were at their dads thankfully.
I had an arguing with him about how I'm always alone because I'm supposed to be resting and he's always out.

He came in and came I upstairs.. Took his belt off and threw it at me.
He then took my phone from my hands and accused me of cheating.

He told me to delete all our mutual friends from Facebook or he would.
I tried to get my phone back and then he smacked me across the face.
Out of shock I smacked him back it was the wrong thing to do I know but i automatically went to defend myself.

The all clear of a sudden he punched in the cheek and cracked my head against the wall. Some how I ended up with the phone but it had died so I couldn't contact anyone.
I ran to the bathroom and tried to shut the door. He came in hurling abuse agian backing me into the shower where it came on and i ended up soaked.
He called me things like "fat slag"
Told he was going to look up one of his exs that puts me to shame and for a full hour followed me round making threats about how he would have the baby taken away from me ect. I was horrified and I'm still shaking not believing what's actually happened.
I'm terrified to tell anyone.
I'm terrified of being alone.
I don't know what to do.

I slept in my childrens room last night when he eventually went to sleep and when I woke up this morning he said.
I can't believe you smacked me last night look at the scratch on my face.

My face is currently swollen and sore to touch.
When I tried telling him what he'd done his answer was we are both as bad as each other.
Told me I pushed the argument by just not letting him have his "me time"
In this whole pregnancy I've been left at home alone because I've been ill and we've done nothing together.

He goes out every weekend.

He then got ready went out and has gone to play football like nothing has happened.

He has told me I'd have to have him physically removed for him to leave.
Im scared of doing that.
He tells me that it's unfair if I make him go and miss out on his unborn child.
I don't know what to do
Is this my fault?
Did I start this.
How do I find strength when I'm already ill and weak.

You are, understandably, in shock. Stop 'thinking' start 'doing'.

Call the police right now, it might take them a while to get to you.

Call a locksmith & get the locks changed. It doesn't matter who owns it, or whose name it's in if it's rented, or whatever, right now your SAFETY is ALL that matters. Get chains put on if you don't have them.

Call some friends to come around.

I understand you are shocked, scared & embarassed. It shouldn't be, but it's normal for women to feel like that. We need to empower each other & our daughters NOT to be embarassed because it's NOT our fault.

He's talking a lot of shit and I'm sure you know that deep down.

He's been treating you terribly for a long time - it will get worse, not better.

He's already gone from being verbally abusive to physically abusive - he's crossed that line, it WILL escalate & quickly.

You HAVE to keep yourself, your children & your unborn baby safe. You cannot take any chances with this 'man'.

Call the police. You have no choice. Do NOT back down.

Oh. So awful. Police OP, adding my voice to the others. You must call the police as a first point.

Just adding another voice of support. You didn't cause this and you don't deserve it. I hope you can find the strength to do what you need to. For your children if it's hard to do it for yourself.

He thinks he has you trapped now, because you are pregnant. The barely disguised mask hasn't just slipped, he's taken it off. Get this violent man out of your life, and more importantly your children's life. You have the choice to stay or go, your children don't. Keep in mind, when, and it is when not if, your children witness this violence, your ex will find out. How do you think he will react, knowing this is going on in front of his kids.

Phone the police. Please.

Poor you! Do you have anyone in RL who can help you?

If he has abused you for a long time, your self esteem will be low. So it's important to find someone you can trust who can be the strength you need.

As PP say, think of your DC and your unborn baby. Protect them now before the abuse escalates and it becomes harder to leave.

I know you feel trapped at the moment huni and feel sick and scared but you must take a big breath and just jump.

You've done a brave thing already and admitted to other people that the abuse actually happened - it's not in your mind, it will get worse and it WAS bad.

It's the best time to get out, the kids aren't around, he's not around and the abuse happened recently. Just grab your bag, keys, phone and money, don't think about it and go to a friends / family or even a coffee shop and call the police or the helpline number someone listed above. Do it for your kids if not yourself but do it please. There are people that can help you so don't be frightened.

He is a violent controlling bastard and they never change. Sending you a big hug.

Please please find the strength to leave this utter prick.

You aren't safe around him.

Do you need to be checked out by anyone? Especially given the fact you're pregnant.

Just echoing what everyone else is saying - call the police lovely

Ok love ive been whare youve been. I never reported it. Not the first time or the second or the 3rd of the 6th or the 10th. I didnt leave when he got another woman pregnant or didnt come home at night. I used to lock my self in my room at night so he wouldnt come in. I finally left when he hadnt been home for 3 nights. Im going through the legal process but its so much harder without me ringing anyone the fitst time round or taking pictures of the injuries. The police believed me when i did go and have been ahmazing. They are being so supportive and got me an idas worker i had a marak meeting and now get legal aid.
Act now because hell abuse you again and again and again. My daughter who is tiny is affected by being around the abuse and is terrified of men. Do it for your kids.
Ring the police
Take pictures of your injuries.
Go to the hospital to get the baby and you checked out.
My best wishes and love. It will only get better.
Good luck my darling

another voice in the choir, call the police love, take your power back

I've been there. My first husband started to strangle and beat and assault me when I was pregnant with my eldest. Took me until he punched me to the ground and I landed an inch from my child for me to realise I had to leave. In that attack he ripped all the muscles in my right shoulder.

Oh you poor darling. Please, please phone the police now and also get yourself and the baby checked over. You must protect yourself and your children, as hard and overwhelming as this all seems.

Do you have real life support? Family, friends?

Pressed the button too quick. I didn't call the police. I went the solicitor route and filed for divorce. I wish I had gone the police route because it would have been easier over the following ten years of hell he tried to give me.

So I beg you. For you, your children please please please report him.

Please call the police.

You'd rather be with this nasty brute than be alone. My goodness loneliness is a picnic in the park compared to abuse.
It will happen again abs again abs again.
And don't have him tell you. You made him do it. He did it because he's an evil twat.
If he'll hit you when you're pregnant. It doesn't bare thinking about what he'll do when you're not.
He says it's unfair. Well perhaps he should have thought of that before he started throwing his weight around a defenceless pregnant women. It'll be unfair on yourself, your children and your unborn baby to have this specimen in your lives, and also. If you don't mind me assuming but I doubt you and your ex split up because you didn't like the same pot of jam. Your poor children must have seen enough conflict, already.
Get this toxin out of your life. Please.

OP - please please report him now and run - anywhere you can go.

He has no self- control. Next time he could kill you or your unborn child. Please act now. There is no going back.

Call the police honey. You don't need strength to do that you just pick up the phone that's it. Pick it up and start talking. Do it NOW whilst he's out. Don't think about the consequences or problems. Don't think about whats wrong with him. Just pic up the phone and call the police.

Your strength will come - later but right now this is as simple as anything you just pick the phone up and dail.

Yes I've been there (for 10years) but here is the truth calling the police is very easy if you don't give yourself the choice. Don't do it for your kids do it for yourself because somewhere deep inside you, you still know your worth more than this.

Then when you've done that come back here and we will give you all the support and advice we can. But right now there is only one thing to do (please trust us) call the police.

This was so distressing for me to read

You need to call the police, please don't let him get away with this

Call Woman's Aid or the police or a friend but for goodness sake let someone know as you are quite clearly in danger.

I know you must be in terrible shock but you will have to let the authorities know in order to protect yourself, your children and your unborn child.

Come back and talk to us to let us know how you are.

Please call the police. Don't wait. Do it now, for you and your children. Be safe. You deserve so much better than this.

Leave now! Call the police. You owe it yourself and your children. They could witness him doing this to you again or it could be them next. Don't take the rest risk. Get somewhere safe.

Report it asap to the police, they will believe you, tell your friends and family so it's out in the open.

Adding a hand for you to hold. Call the police sweetheart.

Please call the police OP.

You do know what to do. Exactly what you would tell someone else to do. Hospital and Police. Do it now. Either call the police first or go to the hospital and they will do it for you. xxxx