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Original poster

Horrible tinder message

84 replies

polkadotrocks · 30/08/2016 22:37

Just opened a message on tinder:

'you have a good first pic, but you're really just a fat girl'

Sent a suitably scathing response but am kind of crushed.

I have lost 3 1/2 stone. Am now a size 14. I thought I looked ok now.

Waaaaahhh!

OP posts:
honeyroar · 30/08/2016 23:12

I like Liney's response too.

What a fuckwitt. I'd have been upset too, but deep down you can't not know that he is a rude idiot and knows nothing whatsoever about you. Your reply was good.

Can you not report sad bullies like him on Internet dating?

Hellothereitsme · 30/08/2016 23:13

Ignore. Old can be as cruel as real life. I can remember many years ago sitting on a wall minding my own business and a bloke walked past and said "nice legs shame about the face". I'm not that bad really!!!! Men can be utter knobs.

IJustAteTheKidsFoodAgain · 30/08/2016 23:13

Perhaps he read the game and massively misunderstood negging? I say lucky escape from an insecure idiot. Well done on the weight loss, a confident man does not need to make others feel bad, keyboard warriors are beyond pathetic, I bet you look great

willfuckformichilenstarfood · 30/08/2016 23:17

I'm a size 18, I haven't lost 3.5 stone. But I'm sexy as fuck and so are you. All of you xxx

sarahC40 · 30/08/2016 23:19

Tinder works as natural selection; he's too horrible to be able to convince anyone to procreate with him.

Benedikte2 · 30/08/2016 23:19

Polka, well done for losing that amount of weight -- what method did you use? A size 14 is something half the world dreams about. However, that aside, a relationship based purely on the physical is too shallow to be worthwhile and I doubt these bitter twisted men will ever find what they are looking for. Just a pity you have to pick your way through the chaff.
Good luck

PepsiPenguin · 30/08/2016 23:19

I gave up, had a few dates all were just awful 😬 God so bloody awful and then there were the cock photos.

Men who send cock photos have a pattern it goes something like this.

"Hey babe you look nice and your profile sounds like your intelligent and funny"

You think about replying but before you get a chance, the bright spark thinks, "what can I do to grab this nice ladies attention, oh I know I will send her a picture of my cock..."

You receive said photo and think oh great, it's a penis

Then you get "so what do you think"

"Hello, did you get my photo"

Your think oh fuck don't send me another one... So you try to reply. At first I was kinda polite with "nah not for me" then they would ask what was wrong with it.

I got them all the time, I'm still a little concerned that I have a face that says "show me your cock"

Oh I don't miss the days of OLD.

UnGoogleable · 30/08/2016 23:23

Ooh I was going to suggest you tell him to fuck off, but your actual response was MUCH better!

You already know not to take it to heart, right? And that he's a wankstain. And everything everyone has said above.

Good luck with OLD. I met my wonderful DH that way, there are good ones out there (but probably not on Tinder, to be honest - wanker central)

merville · 30/08/2016 23:24

He's called a troll and what do we do with trolls? ...

Replying at all is giving him the reaction, attention and 'high' that he wants .. but it sounds like it's your first one so understandable that you bit.
I would bet you considerable money that he's sent dozens of similar messages to women.
There's a psychological phenomenon this relates to - can't remember the name but basically for people desperate enough for attention, negative attention is better than none.
He's also probably quite unsuccessful with women, is bitter and resentful and this makes him feel better and preempts rejection.

Horrible tinder message
NovemberInDailyFailLand · 30/08/2016 23:25

I personally feel it's very convenient when halfwits announce themselves immediately. Saves so much time :)

merville · 30/08/2016 23:27

Oh and size 14 is not fat - 14-16 is average for the UK. But if it wasn't that, it'd be something else.

Shockers · 30/08/2016 23:31

A man in the pub once told me that I was fat. He was fatter than me, but he was the father of a child I taught, so I kept quiet, then went home and cried.

DH couldn't understand why the opinion of a dickhead mattered to me. I couldn't explain to him that it didn't... it was the fact that somebody had taken the time out to be intentionally mean to me that upset me. I felt violated... singled out.

I saw him on my leaving do from that school and I told him what a sad little drunk I thought he was. He got upset!!

Some people are just mean. Please don't take it personally. Have you tried one of the dating sites for specific interests? I know of two married couples who met through them, one for professionals, the other to do with cycling and running.

I hope you find somebody lovely.

HappyAxolotl · 30/08/2016 23:34

Calling someone fat is the loser's last word isn't it? Takes no wit & wisdom to say it and as most of us have some insecurities about our bodies, it's guaranteed to sting.

Were you talking already or did he message you just to say that? What a freak he is. Clearly got issues and you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or he hates women (or people full-stop) and randomly lashes out. I know it is easy to say but take it as a plus that this knobhead self-identified as such early on and you didn't end up on a date with him!

honeyroar · 30/08/2016 23:36

Just reply, "I guess you don't do very well on here with your lack of personality, charm and manners. Even if I was fat, which I'm not, I could do something about it, you however are stuck as a moron for life."

thefourgp · 30/08/2016 23:36

I agree with linney too. My husband knows a guy like this. Used to work with him. Adds nasty comments on newspaper articles, twitter, OLD etc just goading for attention. Permanently single, resents women, angry, damaged and constantly looking for an argument. Any reply feeds and fuels the female attention he craves, even if it's negative. You will not be the only person he's done this too. It's not about your weight. It's not about you. Ignore and block any similar dickheads. Well done on your weight loss and good luck in finding someone worth fending off the trolls for. X

RitesOfSpring · 30/08/2016 23:37

Somebody who goes out of their way just to insult somebody else is obviously deeply unfulfilled in their life. You have to try not to place any value on the opinion of such a person.

The opinions that matter are those of people who care about you or at least have a desire to show other people decency and compassion.

Czerny88 · 30/08/2016 23:42

Utter knob.

However, I don't think it's on to use "micropenis" as a jibe. It must be a horrendous condition to live with and most people wouldn't consider referring to some other type of deformity or disability in order to insult someone.

Italiangreyhound · 30/08/2016 23:42

polkadotrocks I hope you sent back a 'And your a prick, glad I found out quickly' message.

He clearly has arsehole issues, e.g. he is one.

I am sure you are lovely. Hope you find someone lovely or perhaps try a more traditional dating route, maybe a agency where you will be treated better.

Good luck (I met my husband through a Christian dating agency 18 years ago). XXX Thanks

Italiangreyhound · 30/08/2016 23:43

you're a prick.... grammer!

RitesOfSpring · 30/08/2016 23:44

grammer

Was that deliberate?

Dizzybintess · 30/08/2016 23:45

I bet he has a micropenis
Breath like satans jockstrap
The intellect of Fred west
And a hairpiece like Donald trump (along with his winning personality)

I bet you look fab xx

TriniRedVelvet · 30/08/2016 23:50

People can be so cruel. I once had a guy tell me I'm good looking but he only dates svelte models. Meanwhile, he looks like Scrat...

Lottielou7 · 30/08/2016 23:52

I know it's easy for me to say but You mustn't let people like this get to you. Nobody clicks like without looking at all the photos first. So he must be doing this deliberately to upset people.

I'm generally considered good looking in RL and I've had some nasty comments directed at me like who the hell do you think you are, you're not all that and worse! I just ignored them.

One harsh lesson that I have learned from online dating is that some of the men on there are woman haters and it gives them a high to hurt and confuse women. Dating sites are a playground for them.

Screw him, I'm sure you're lovely :))

RealityCheque · 30/08/2016 23:53

It's hardly surprising that you get such shallow fuckwits comments on an app that exists purely to effectively select potential shags based solely on appearance.

You can lose more weight (if YOU want to). He will always be a bellend.

Applejack29 · 30/08/2016 23:54

He weeded himself out for you!

I can be anything from a size 16-20 depending on the type of clothes/where it's from etc, I've met a lovely bloke on tinder who I'm seeing and he thinks I'm the most beautiful thing ever. Flowers they're not all knobs! I've had my fair share too.

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