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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Ok....

54 replies

Fireandflames666 · 02/07/2016 18:45

I was messaging my best male friend the other day and was telling him that my drunk oh was trying to push me in to having sex. He replied with "oh, that'll be another kid on the way then!". Why would he say that?. I don't know how to take it.

OP posts:
loveyoutothemoon · 02/07/2016 18:53

I think you'll have more of an idea than we have on mumsnet!

0hCrepe · 02/07/2016 18:54

What did you expect him to say? It's an odd thing for you to share with a male friend and he probably felt he needed to say something whilst trying to avoid references to your relationship and sex.

SoleBizzz · 02/07/2016 18:58

You were looking fir support and he didn't know what to say for all sorts of unknown reasons. I wouldn't stay with a man who thought it was his place to push me into having sex with him.

loobyloo1234 · 02/07/2016 18:58

Do you have other children? And were they conceived when he/you were drunk? Very confusing post Hmm

SandyY2K · 02/07/2016 18:59

How many kids do you have?
Were they all conceived when he pushed you into having sex?

Would you be comfortable if he talked about sex with a female friend ?

One word for you. Boundaries

SoleBizzz · 02/07/2016 18:59

Or your friend is an insensitive person or he is fed up of advising you about your relationship. Why do you think he responded the way he did?

Muddlewitch · 02/07/2016 19:05

Do you/OH have any children?

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 02/07/2016 19:21

I have two children, and they were both planned (no drink involved). I know pushy is wrong, he apologised afterwards.

Me and my friend always share issues with each other, Always have done. I though he was being jealous maybe, probably wrong though.

OP posts:
Yeahthatwasme · 02/07/2016 20:16

I though he was being jealous maybe, probably wrong though.

Well well well. This is the most revealing post.

There was nothing remotely in your OP to suggest jealousy. It is pretty clear that you are looking for it - and also, by inappropriately discussing your sex life with a male friend - trying to provoke it.

It may very well be subconcious on your part but the fact you posted about this strongly indicates that it's playing on your mind.

You either want to be with this man or want to get off by provoking his jealousy to boost your ego or triangulate your relationship.

You will fully deny this I know but I suggest you have a deep look into your heart and your motivations. This is not healthy.

Your poor OH whatever the truth of it is - it's not nice or fair to him. If you aren't happy leave; if you are, stop trying to use your friends for your own ends.

BolshierAryaStark · 02/07/2016 20:21

Ha ha ha, do you have feelings for/a crush on this particular male friend by any chance?

loveyoutothemoon · 02/07/2016 20:26

I agree, doesn't sound like jealousy, not sure what it is though.

Is there more to it?

SmallLegsOrSmallEggs · 02/07/2016 20:31

Your problem is not your fruends behaviour..it is your OH.

wombattoo · 02/07/2016 20:32

Weird Confused

CalleighDoodle · 02/07/2016 20:36

Totally agree with yeahthatwasme

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 02/07/2016 20:36

No, no feelings for this friend. Been friends for many years, it just seemed usual for him to say something like that.

I thought I was just over thinking, think I was right, lol.

OP posts:
Costacoffeeplease · 02/07/2016 20:36

It's weird that you told him, what he replied is weird, and the fact that you think he could be jealous is the weirdest of the lot

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 02/07/2016 20:39

Why is it weird?. What would you see it as?.

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 02/07/2016 20:39

No, no feelings for this friend. Been friends for many years, it just seemed usual for him to say something like that.

Haven't you posted before about being in love with him?

Costacoffeeplease · 02/07/2016 20:42

Because there's nothing in what he said that implies jealousy, I don't get why you think it does

BolshierAryaStark · 02/07/2016 20:43

Not jealousy-as said upthread, you need to consider boundaries... Who the fuck texts that to any friend tolerates that shit anyway, it if it's real... let alone closest male one that they have no feelings for, oh no, not at all.

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 02/07/2016 20:43

That was a different "friend" actually. Not spoken to him since that thread was posted.

OP posts:
Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 02/07/2016 20:45

Well, thanks for your Input people. Much appreciated.

OP posts:
GrimmauldPlace · 02/07/2016 20:46

Did you ask him what he meant by it?

Original poster
Fireandflames666 · 02/07/2016 20:48

No I didn't. I changed the subject as I didn't know how to respond.

OP posts:
LadyStarkOfWinterfell · 02/07/2016 20:49

Most women don't have best male friends who they discuss their sex lives with. It's an unusual thing to do past about 21