Taking photos without knowledge

[Questioning25]

Hi all. My partner and I have been living together for roughly six months now. We were close friends before we got together (and while we were both in longterm relationships with other people . . . neither one of us are particularly proud of the fact that our friendship became so close). About two weeks into dating, he was forced out of his apartment and asked to stay with me while he found a new place. I agreed and he has remained living here ever since.

While we have some issues, he can be argumentative and I hate conflict and he's somewhat controlling and I'm more of a go with the flow kind of person, we generally get along pretty well. However, he constantly takes photos of me while I'm not aware of it. None of them are inappropriate, at least that I know. It apparently started the first night he spent the night (he showed me one of me sleeping) and has continued ever since. For some reason, it strikes me as somewhat creepy. AIBU?

I'd guarantee that he's open with his electronics because he's got a secret stash where he puts the really good ones. You know, the ones of you sleeping naked with close-ups of your private parts.

Because my ex was exactly the same. Taking the photos - careful to hide the ones I'd go nuts at. Even having to move out of his rooms during the first six weeks of our relationship and nowhere to stay but at mine. Then he kind of never left really. My ex's father was emotionally abusive, his mother was lovely, but a scared little mouse who jumped at her husband's command. My ex was lovely and supportive of my woes and issues too. Initally that is. Then jealousy, verbal abuse and gaslighting crept in. The empathetic veneer wore off.

I left when he tried to strangle me in an argument he engineered and had been brewing for days.

Good luck for the future, OP.

Your rs with this man sounds pretty compromised to me: you admit that you hate conflict, while he is controlling. That is a well-worn pattern on these boards, and I've never known it to end well.

Do what you have to do. But please try and take care of yourself, first and foremost.

I hope it all goes well.

The fact that he eventually realised how creepy it seem is a positive. Not like the man in the link.

Just don't let yourself become controlled by him.

Good luck.

Hi all,

I'm not sure if any of the posters from this thread are left around but I wanted to say thank you. I'm still with the man that I was referencing and we are happy together. But it wouldn't have been possible without several frank and honest discussions inspired by you all. I know that I'm lucky in the fact that he turned out to be a good one (it very well could have been the opposite) and so I also appreciate the advice that some gave about leaving as well.

Legitimately happy for you, hope it keeps going well.

Well done for listening and taking everything on board op!
Genuinely wish you good luck for the future.

That's good to hear. There were some harsh posters on the thread , you did well to sift out the helpful advice.