Lies

[KitchenNightmare99]

I have caught my DH out on a lie not a massive one but one that has shook me enough.

I was away with friends overnight two months ago that day I heard from
DH sporadically he told me he was in house chilling. I tried to ring him a few times and no answer. My mum had DC as she had an activity she was bringing her too but I assumed DH would collect her later he didn't. When I got home I asked him what he had done he said nothing had spent day n house alone enjoying the peace and quiet. I just knew something didn't add up.

He has been quiet recently and we have been arguing. Last night I looked at his phone and there was nothing suspicious. I decided to look at his locations and seen that the day I was away he was in a seaside town about two hours from us. I confronted him and he said he just went a drive and didn't tell me because he knew I'd jump to conclusions. We had a long talk and he said about us arguing is making him unhappy etc and we did seem to get somewhere but this lie doesn't sit right with me.


In terms of OW there was nothing on his phone he is always with us if not in work. He doesn't go out on his own but I don't know why lie. Any views on this?

[TheNaze73]

Sounds proper dodgy to me. Sorry

[KitchenNightmare99]

It started just after he came home from a stag a few weeks before. It's just weird to me. As far as I know he hasn't cheated before and hasn't gave me reason to think he has. But my gut is telling me something isn't adding up. I studied his phone for two hours last night trying to find anything but It's easy for him to delete. I suppose

[EarthboundMisfit]

His reason makes no sense at all unless he had reason to believe you wouldn't want him going for a drive.

[KitchenNightmare99]

that has crossed my mind....

[OneTwoOneTwoThreeFour]

Are you sure it was a stag, not a weekend away with someone else?

It all sounds very dodgy to me.

[OneTwoOneTwoThreeFour]

I am sorry to say that, it's not a nice situation. 💐

[KitchenNightmare99]

Definatley a stag we were at the wedding just after it where the stags dad sand my DH praises about how great a guy he was. The grooms dad went to 'babysit' the groom as he is not good with drink and my DH was the only sensible one according to the dad

[KitchenNightmare99]

I know it's all doesn't add up but I just can't figure out how I'm gonna find out the truth I don't believe his reason but I can't find anything else incriminating

[OneTwoOneTwoThreeFour]

Could it be someone from work? Bide your time and it will all come out.

And think about what you would do if it does turn out to be an affair.

[AnyFucker]

Was the stag do based close to where he lied about visiting when you were away ?

[KitchenNightmare99]

No the stag was in Spain

[KitchenNightmare99]

I don't know there is a girl in work I got a bit worried about no reason really just her name coming up a bit more but messages and call list don't show anything inappropriate just work stuff

[OneTwoOneTwoThreeFour]

There's your answer, I reckon.

[crayfish]

It doesn't sound great to be honest. Has he got form for this kind of thing? Are you usually jealous/paranoid? Just wondering why he would think you would jump to 'conclusions'?

Deleting stuff off a phone is easy peasy. Can you access his actual phone bill?

[LineyReborn]

The first time my ExH cheated on me that I know of, it was with a younger woman from work, during the day, at a Travel Lodge. For his part it took (a) organisation, and (b) lies.

It was his 'off' behaviour afterwards that was the giveaway. He minimised it for weeks.

I'm sorry if this is happening to you. It's crap.

[KitchenNightmare99]

Ok so on his phone bill no calls or texts made that day except the few to me. I spoke to him again and he has said he needed to clear his head that day we have been fighting loads (which is true) he is unhappy with work and us. He loves me but feels we don't get on...again true I've asked him does he want to break up he doesn't he is just 'fed up'

[SandyY2K]

He could have used a messaging app. That won't show up on the phone bill.

Have you tried to resolve all the arguing? Try taking time out to get to the bottom of what's making you both unhappy in a calm non accusatory manner on both sides.

[OneTwoOneTwoThreeFour]

He wouldn't have needed to call or text someone he was with...

Anyway, sounds like you are concerned about your relationship anyway- have you thought about counselling? For you, I mean, rather than couples.

[crayfish]

Good point. Whatsapp doesn't show on a bill I think.

His explanation makes more sense I suppose but it's the 'conclusions' but that bothers me.

[picklypopcorn]

Prostitute I reckon, seaside town, unhappy marriage, no calls.

[picklypopcorn]

Also, could he have a secret phone?

[MissBianca]

More likely pre arranged trip to seaside with ow.

It's rubbish, OP, even worrying like this

[KitchenNightmare99]

Checked his what's app and phone history nothing that would imply prostitute at all. I'm just going to keep a very very close eye on everything. He is adamant he doesn't want a break but he has agreed we need to work more on us. We will see...