why do I do this to myself

[imsuchafool12345]

I'm such a horrible person. I just lied to my partner cause I knew he'd flip and he found out and flipped anyway. now he said he doesn't want nothing to do with me now and left me and our son in our room.

thing is the lie wasn't that big. Nothing like me cheating or having EA. and if anything I should be the one angry at him cause he keeps calling me stupid and thick and he doesn't want his son turning out like me.

I know I'll probably be flamed for lying I deserve it but I don't believe it deserved to be spiralled out of control.

I want to get out of this house but if I phone he'll know about it. I have a text message for the police ready but I don't want them involved just yet.

Text NOW I agree he's dangerous, get out of there please.

I feel to scared to do it

Why?

Your baby's father is a controlling abusive bully.

It will only get worse. Time to make a choice but your son should come first.

Going
"Why?"

Surely it's obvious?! The OP is being abused, of course she is afraid of her abuser and afraid of standing up to him or leaving him.

OP, it's ok to be afraid. But you can do this. You can get help and you will be ok.

FGS. He's all bluff and bluster. If your dgps turn up on the doorstep he'll wet himself.

But what are you doing involving your ds in this madness? I know he's a babe in arms but, nevertheless, you shouldn't be telling him that "daddy doesn't want me".

And what is this business about you having "a text message for the police ready" but not wanting them to be "involved just yet"?

If you're under threat call 999. If not, call your dm or your dgps and ask them to come and get you so that you can make contact with Women's Aid away from your home.

Why is she scared to get help is what I obviously meant

Going
I know. "Because she is being abused" is the obvious answer.

I'm not derailing this thread Emma with answering you.

OP. Good luck.

he's letting me leave thank God.

we shouted before the baby to be fair

I hope you're not one of those women who become addicted to the drama, OP. If so, the reason for your reluctance to call the police will be your fear that doing so will cause the relationship to be over.

I would imagine your neighbours are aware there's a young baby living in your home and it may be that one of them will call the police if they hear shouting/arguing. I know I wouldn't hesitate to do so and if this should happen you'll have SS on your case.

Do you have friends or family members you can stay with for a couple of nights, or until you've made contact with Women's Aid?

I'm going to stay with my nan and grandad cause they have a spare room then go from there.

and no I don't like the drama I hate it. and my neighbours shout with each other themselves and have kids so I know they won't do nothing either way.

please do report his threats - to 101 or HV or GP. You want his behaviour on record for future in case child contact becomes a concern. Keep a record of everything.

I'm so glad you're going to stay with your grandparents for a bit. They will probably be happy to have you and your little one.

Please do call Women's Aid when you are there and safe.

Please don't go back.

Well done getting out. That took some strength so hold on to that.
I hope your GPs are a good support for you.
Do still call Womens Aid and get some advice from them on what to do next.
They can put you in touch with local organisations that can help you.
I do hope you can have a happy life without this awful abusive man in it.

he just said I have anxiety and depression problems
I think you'll find these reduce dramatically without him controlling you and MAKING you feel anxious and depressed!

I wouldn't be too complacent about the neighbours as it only takes one concerned person walking past a house and hearing what sounds to be a violent row to call the police.

Stay with your dgps, make contact with your nearest Women's Aid service, enrol on the Freedom Programme, and keep posting on this thread so that it can serve as a record of your achievements.

now he's saying I'm using our son against him cause I said I'm taking him with me and I'll sort something out with him after a week of him thinking to himself. he also said he can't see why I expect him to do 9 hours at work come home and play with his son and I don't so once I start doing 9 hours of house work then he'll start playing with his son.

Have you left yet?

Try not to listen. He is a nasty man and he will say whatever he can to blame you and manipulate you. He is wrong, not you.

Time to start ignoring his calls and texts. Give him an email that he can contact you on regarding your child and important matters and ignore the rest. He needs to grow up. Yes real men work hard then come home and enjoy their babies. It's not a competition to see who is doing the most. This man will never put your child first. ...ever.

He's talking out of his arse. No-one can do 9 straight hours of housework when they have infants to care for and he should be longing to get home from work so that he can play and engage with his son.

Take no notice of his whinging and concentrate on getting yourself and ds off to your dgps.

sorry I've been sorting my stuff out then leaving then sorting my son out.

I have the most horrible headache I feel crap and just so down.

I'm sat in the spare bedroom going over how I can't believe he went for me till he saw me holding my son. I heard him running up the stairs and I panicked thinking he was going to hurt both of us.