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Original poster

How DARE he? Ar$e is too mild now - I am FUMING!!!

124 replies

essbee · 21/05/2004 18:00

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Original poster
essbee · 22/05/2004 20:11

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Chocol8 · 22/05/2004 23:05

Essbee - in answer to your question, I live in Luton (for my sins). I can however, walk, drive the car, take the train or fly...anything to get my maulers on this tosser.

The incident with the cash machine (for which I may still be arrested!!! yikes!) is small fry to what this wanker deserves. I know, as I have a soon to be xh (roll on July) and he did the same thing to me. In fact he is still doing it, and the mad thing is, I used to be soooo trusting and every single time, he would shit on me from a great height. The time he did it to my ds though was the time my head nearly exploded with rage (not a pretty sight) and I could quite easily have done the things to him which I would like to do to your wh (new abbreviation - wh: wanker husband). So, if I am near to you, or can get there, please let me know and I will do spectacularly bad things to him for you, with pleasure.

The above exclusive offer only lasts for one more day, as I will have finished my period and be quite a nice person again. However, next month....is a different story.

jampot · 22/05/2004 23:08

I know a really good family lawyer - sadly she's not a barracuda.

Chocol8 - I also know an excellent criminal lawyer who can be like a barracuda!

Original poster
essbee · 22/05/2004 23:11

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coppertop · 22/05/2004 23:23

If he's so desperate to get his hands on some CD's perhaps we should all visit the local charity shops and car-boot sales and buy him some. "Des O'Connnor's Greatest Hits", "The Black Lace Party Album" and "Sounds of Steam Engines" ought to be a good start. And if we all forgot to put enough stamps on them.....

Original poster
essbee · 22/05/2004 23:24

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jampot · 22/05/2004 23:24

I'm in for that! In fact I think I have some Disney shite lying around!!

Chocol8 · 22/05/2004 23:25

Hehehehe. Damn Essbee, i should have made the offer earlier, then I could have taken Friday off and really gone to town - literally!

Jampot, thanks I may just need a criminal lawyer! I really do turn back into a pussy cat when I'm not menstrual - honestly!

Since our first altercation when I chucked him out, my stb-xwh has always been "The Wanker" on my mobile phone. Even 4.5 years on, it still delights me to see my phone light up with a call to say "The Wanker calling...". Ahh, such simple pleasures eh? (Note the capitals, cos he really is the wanker amongst wankers (except yours of course!).

You're not too far away, Esbee, maybe next month eh? x

Chocol8 · 22/05/2004 23:26

Coppertop - I liiiiike it! Mmmmmm....!

Original poster
essbee · 22/05/2004 23:29

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essbee · 22/05/2004 23:32

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jampot · 22/05/2004 23:33

I live with my dh and I might change his name in my mobile too!

In fact, if you have a composer on your phone why don't you make up a tune just for The Wanker and call it The Wanker (bit like Buffoon)then post all the keystrokes on here and it can be a nationally adopted Wanker Theme. Maybe one day everyone will pay a frigging ridiculous price to download it from Tunes2Go or something similar.

Chocol8 · 22/05/2004 23:35

Essbee, can you fit ALL those names on a mobile listing?

Coppertop - Please can you save the "Sounds of Steam Engines" for my ds - he is mad on trains and we don't want it to to be wasted on Essbee's wanker do we?

coppertop · 22/05/2004 23:36

Dh says there's a song called "I'm A Wanker" but he can't remember who sang it. Some comedian he says....

Original poster
essbee · 22/05/2004 23:37

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jampot · 22/05/2004 23:38

Well then young lady - GET YOURSELF A NEW MOBILE THEN!!!!

Chocol8 · 22/05/2004 23:38

Yeah, he's right! I remember that! Can't remember the words except "I'm a wanker, I'm a wanker". Does anyone know? That would be hilarious!

coppertop · 22/05/2004 23:38

Or it might have been called "He's A Wanker"?

Chocol8 - the steam engines CD was one I saw ages ago. I didn't actually buy it.

jampot · 22/05/2004 23:40

The only one I know is "You're a wanker, you're a wanker" but I think I made that one up !

coppertop · 22/05/2004 23:41

Dh thinks the words are:

"I'm a wanker,
What a wanker.
It does me good,
Like it bloody well should..."

Chocol8 · 22/05/2004 23:41

Bummer - it would've kept him happy for days!

Yeah, could be "He's a wanker", but not sure. The tune is really catchy though. ARRRRGHHHH! I know I will wake up in the morning singing it now!

Chocol8 · 22/05/2004 23:43

We will obviously have to ask the oracle on old pop songs on whether it's "He's a wanker", "I'm a wanker" or "Your a wanker".

Original poster
essbee · 22/05/2004 23:44

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Chocol8 · 22/05/2004 23:45

That's the one....arghhhhh!

jampot · 22/05/2004 23:47

Frank Zappa?