Festive family fury.? Don't bottle it up. Let it all out here.

[Mincepiedermama]

Families and Christmas eh?

What have they done?
How has it left you feeling?
How do you plan to move on from here?

So far I've had the usual torrent of advice from my MIL mixed with observations about our handling of ds's diabetes. (She knows nothing about diabetes. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRR!!)

Got that feels a little better but there's more to come.

Not quite on topic of this thread but just need a quick growl... DS' father (who does not live with us though it's all v amicable) is normally excellent dad, perfect free babysitter etc. Tonight he came round as arranged to look after DS while I went out to work... asked him if he'd give DS his bath as wanted to get changed and go out a bit early so as to hit Primark (yup, I'm really classy) before going to work. He said sure, no problem, so I told him that DS sleepsuit and clean vest were on the rail in the bathroom. Went out to work, which turned out to be all off (is a club and something had gone wrong, got v garbled phone message etc) so came home. As I arrived, DS dad was just coming down the stairs to say he had just been checking on DS who was fast asleep and fine, so I settled down for friendly chat, can of cider etc. Once DSD had gone home, popped upstairs to check DS, who was indeed asleep - but wearing only his vest (inside his Grobag admittedly). Now am I just frothing about this because I feel guilty for a)not doing bath myself b) going out to job which is in sparkly licensed premises full of fit young men rather than taking proper single mother job of scrubbing toilet seats...? Am I nitpicking cross cow when DSD normally does OK? Or shall I smpply cut DSD some slack cos he normally does a great job....

You are nitpicking madamez! It sounds ok to me.

Weelllllll... it's F*CKING cold tonight. And if work hadn't been cancelled I would not have got home till about 3am (after the heating would have gone off). Cos when I did go in to check on DS about about 9.45 he was fidgety and his bare arms were cold to the touch - am just worried about DSD having no more sense than to put him to bed half-undressed in Arctic weather, really. But perhaps DSD had a good lunch today and was being a bit scatterbrained...

Madamez-his intentions might not have been bad, but men seem to have a clothes blind spot when it comes to children.

How do they get themselves dressed in the morning? Must be years of practice or something?

I've been at work all week (full time) and the DSs 19,17 and 15 have all been home. DH has managed to work an extra night so that he conveniently can be elsewhere, but has still had 2 full days at home. My mum is arriving any minute now. I left a very very detailed list of what needed doing in the house, which was an utter tip. They told me last night they'd done it. Right.

This morning I find they haven't cleaned the kitchen cupboard doors, the sink, the hob or the microwave. They have found some "dirty washing" which they've chucked on the floor in front of the washing machine- only it isn't all dirty and it is odd things that won't wash together. Tidying up the dining area and living room involved putting everything into piles, which I actually specified not to do. Each pile includes old newspapers, bills not paid yet, receipts, letters, junk flyers, credit card statements etc. Someone (ie me) will now have to go through every pile again- thanks a bundle.

Mum is staying in DDs room, which I have been telling her for months now to sort out, since she came home from uni and filled it with boxes. She was supposed to come home last Sunday but "slept till 3 and then had kickboxing so couldn't come home" which of course makes that alright then. She started last night but is working all day.

And to make for a really festive break, DS1 and 2 and DD are working till 8 today and again tomorrow. DH worked last night and will work tonight so will be asleep all day today (if he ever gets home) and all day tomorrow. DD and DS2 are working all day Boxing day and DH returns to work Boxing night. Hardly worth the effort for just me, DS3 and grandma stuck here on our own.

(I've told them all next year I'm off to New York on my own for Xmas and they can all stuff themselves...)

Dangers of ranting on MN - dh has been spying on me and he saw what I had written.

Oh dear - a frosty Christmas ahead for us.

On the positive side, at least I know now he is spying on me

Good lord, HOW have I missed this thread?

Ah, I saw it last night and just read the last post from madame, oh dear, I do feel fro you lot.

We are having Christmas with just me, dh, dd and ds, bliss. We spent a day last weekend with my family and will see his in Jan sometime. And some friends are popping in on Boxing Day but I'm looking forward to that.

This is such classic mumsnet, I love this:

Morningpaper: She also has a habit of washing and drying stuff and then leaving it in random piles in the kitchen "because she doesn't know where it goes." I don't know why this irritates me so much, but it makes me want to stab everyone with the pickle forks.

wakeupandsmellthecoffee: morningpaper you have pickle forks?

I wish I had pickle forks

I am spending Christmas entirely on my own, as my ex has managed, as usual, to get Christmas cancelled. He is in my house with my children, while I am in another country, sorting out his mess.
But reading this thread, I can see that I have something to be thankful for.

I used to have pickle forks. I won them at a school fair. Never used them. They sat in the cupboard for years until I donated them to the school fair again. Now I realise I should have stabbed the inlaws with them....

what do they actually look like ?

Not me but am so at this I had to post. A friend from work has her MIL staying for christmas, she arrived a few days ago and the first thing she said when she saw her was 'Oh, you've put on weight, your present is not going to fit you and it's a size 16. You must be clinically obese now. Have you been to see your GP?'

BTW she is only about a size 12/14.

Then, she used their computer to print off a special low fat diet sheet for her.

Pickle forks
Mine were not quite so elegant as these - they were shorter, & had wooden handles and they were in a little wooden owl pot.

well you live and learn I will now have to have some pickle forks .

at godrestye's friend's comments. I had a friend like that. A flatmate actually. She was German and very, erm, upfront. She used to say 'Oh Gott! You've had a haircut. And it vos so feminine before. Now you look like a great big dyke.'

She had pickle forks. She kept them in the same drawer as her grape scissors.

I don't mean to make anyone jealous here but .... we're alone now. All the offensive relatives have left and it's just the Spider family. Mmmmmmmmm!

spidermama.

We're on Day 4 in the "MIL Stays for a Fortnight2 House. So far the pasta has been "underseasoned" and the apple crumble "doesn't have enough crumble for my taste". Lots of sitting on the sofa while DH & I run around cooking.

I'm 24 weeks pg and have had a horrible month as scans have shown up that baby has a bowel problem that might need surgery as soon as it's born. She hasn't asked how I am, how we're feeling or expressed any kind of sympathy .

When asked what she wanted for Christmas she said she wanted us to take her on holiday with us. Doesn't seem to have occured to her that what with having a toddler & newborn that may be very ill plus DH sitting the biggest exams of his career, next year might not be the best year for us and holidays. If she wasn't so bloody dependant........

Liath - if you want to blow off steam, I'm about (and have been since shortly after 3 )

Just found this thread.

Glad it's not just me

Is it OK to phone you just now??

Yes, ds just waking up, dh out calving...

Lucky DH [hmmm]

Dd up and whinging since 6.30am.

So are pickle forks the most wanted gift this year LOL

Actually I don't have pickle forks

I did USED to have some when I was Young And Married

But I'm not sure what you would REALLY use them for, except for stabbing people, because they are jolly sharp, but they are TINY, like something you'd circumcise a mouse with