Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Non-manly DP?

74 replies

roeG · 17/12/2006 22:07

sorry for the name change but I dont want people to know who I am.

I have a few issues with my dp that are silently winding me up but they seem so petty compared to what other people put up with but its making me not be attracted to him anymore.

Ive always liked 'manly' men, rough around the edges type but dp is very quiet, sensitive etc. all that is ok, he's kind and treats me well but as I say hes very unmanly. For instance he says he cant eat beef as he cant chew it i found this odd but obviously just let it go, not worth arguing about but earlier this year he needed to go the dentist and he had to be sedated just so he could be treated as he was so scared, i did get annoyed at this but then some people do have genuine fear of dentists but theres other things like almost passing out at the sight of blood, shaking like a leaf when the doctor was treating his ears as he has 'sensitive ears' and hes so picky about his food too, will pull faces if I cook certain veg and when we have meat he sits there cutting all the fat off etc before eating it, its like living with another kid. am I over-reacting and should I be more sympathetic or is he behaving like a little girl?

What kind of man cant chew beef??

OP posts:
colditz · 17/12/2006 22:09

Ok, I can see that you may well get pounced on here, and told you are being cruel and discriminatory, and men are allowed to be hypersensitive too, but...

if my dp was pulling faces at the meals I cooked I wouldn't cook for him.

(yes he is behaving like a 4 year old girl)

Cappuccino · 17/12/2006 22:09

'what kind of man can't chew beef'?

did you really write that?

7swansaswimmingup · 17/12/2006 22:10

i like men who are mainly, so it would annoy me.my ex cried over a paper cut, i mean ffs i know they hurt but hes a bloke!

think you'll get quite a varied viewpoint on this but it would wind me up

Glitterygookwithchocsonthetree · 17/12/2006 22:10

ROFL at 'what kind of man can't chew beef?' - sorry, I know it's serious, but am just LMAO!!!!

Cappuccino · 17/12/2006 22:10

and what's wrong with cutting the fat off?

he has to eat fat to qualify as 'manly'?

Glitterygookwithchocsonthetree · 17/12/2006 22:10

Hehehe cappucino!!!

Caroligula · 17/12/2006 22:11

LOL at what kind of man can't chew beef?

beansprout · 17/12/2006 22:12

A vegetarian?

Caroligula · 17/12/2006 22:13

And yes I know it's not PC but it would wind me up too.

I like a man to be a man.

(And I like a story to have a beginning, a middle and an end. And I don't know much about art, but I know what I like. And we used to live in a lake.)

Cappuccino · 17/12/2006 22:13

can he eat a pork pie?

he'd be a man then surely? and they're soft?

Cappuccino · 17/12/2006 22:14

I've got a Yorkshire accent

but I don't need a man to eat fat to want to do him

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 17/12/2006 22:15

Well, why are you with him if he pisses you off so much? If that's the kind of man he is, he's not going to change, is he? And why should he? I feel sorry for him actually, it must be horrible living with someone who is just irritated by everything he does.

Caroligula · 17/12/2006 22:16

She said beef, not fat!

Do you still want to do him roeG?

Cappuccino · 17/12/2006 22:17

'when we have meat he sits there cutting all the fat off etc before eating it'

she did say fat

morningpaper · 17/12/2006 22:19

roeG I think it's really hard when there is something about your DP that makes you NOT want them as a lover - whatever those issues are

What attracted you to him in the first place?

7swansaswimmingup · 17/12/2006 22:19

have you been with him a long time? praps you didnt notice he was so unmanly when you met

Cappuccino · 17/12/2006 22:20

maybe 7swans is right

maybe you had spag bol on your earlier dates

Caroligula · 17/12/2006 22:21

Oh yes so she did.

Full marks on concentration!

I think it's the cumulative effect of all this stuff that would bug me. One of these things would be OK. All of them together would be annoying, unless he was drop dead gorgeous and couldn't sleep without a round of cunnilingus every night.

hoolagirl · 17/12/2006 22:21

Sorry but this would wind me up as well, thought you would have been slaughtered by now by those who like unmanly men
Is there genuinely something wrong with his teeth that he can't chew beef?

Cappuccino · 17/12/2006 22:24

I'm just amazed at how unsupportive you are

poor bloke

he's nervous about being treated for health matters, he's not superkeen on meat, and, er, that's it.

'he's kind and treats me well' would be more my definition of what a real man is, especially if he is a good dad and a reliable partner

rather than his chewing shortcomings

7swansaswimmingup · 17/12/2006 22:24

capucchino, PMSL!

morningpaper · 17/12/2006 22:25

rofl @ round of cunnilingus

The trouble is there isn't much you can DO to make a man MORE manly

He's either got the man-thing going or he hasn't

He can't just grow a beard and start spitting - it's something very intrinsic, something in the way they walk and talk and have that man-confidence thing

Caroligula · 17/12/2006 22:25

pmsl at chewing shortcomings.

SnafuOutOfHiding · 17/12/2006 22:25

Maybe you just cook beef really badly?

Cappuccino · 17/12/2006 22:25

hoolagirl good point

my back teeth are knackered through extractions, failed fillings etc

I don't enjoy chewing away on a hard dry chop either

maybe you don't cook very nicely [evil Santa emoticon]