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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Fuck buddy or Fwb?

55 replies

girlsjustlikedoingpuns · 18/12/2015 17:03

A man i know has asked me to be his fuck buddy. I was just wondering why he didn't ask me to be his friends with benefits? What i'd like to know is, is there a difference between the two before i say yes to anything?

OP posts:
StrapOnDodo · 18/12/2015 17:08

I can't imagine anyone saying either thing out loud..I certainly wouldn't go near anyone who used either expression. Fwb sounds the better of the two, if only because it's less American.

But I'm old and old fashioned, I suppose.

HermioneWeasley · 18/12/2015 17:09

I thought they were the same thing?

Llouh · 18/12/2015 17:12

They mean the same thing but if you're unsure can't you ask the man who is suggesting this?

girlsjustlikedoingpuns · 18/12/2015 17:13

Ok thank you...just wasn't sure!

OP posts:
girlsjustlikedoingpuns · 18/12/2015 17:13

Fwb sounds nicer !

OP posts:
Joysmum · 18/12/2015 17:15

For me a fuck buddy is someone you meet only for sex.

FWB is someone you meet for sex and companionship but is not an exclusive relationship.

In reality, people's perceptions of both vary so you'd do wise to clarify fully what he wants.

sinber · 18/12/2015 17:17

Well surely a fuck buddy is just sex, no friendship needed.

A FWB is friendship with extras, but no relationship.

girlsjustlikedoingpuns · 18/12/2015 17:21

thanks everyone..getting worried now!

OP posts:
girlsjustlikedoingpuns · 18/12/2015 17:21

so just a fuck nothing else?

OP posts:
girlsjustlikedoingpuns · 18/12/2015 17:25

i've got to think carefully about this

OP posts:
WhatALoadOfOldBollocks · 18/12/2015 17:28

Ask him to clarify exactly what sort of relationship he wants because people interpret these phrases differently and you have to know what you're getting into. Vagueness can lead to misunderstandings, so make sure he tells you objectively rather than subjectively. And make sure you know what you want too.

goodnightdarthvader1 · 18/12/2015 17:28

Niiiiiiice.

girlsjustlikedoingpuns · 18/12/2015 17:30

thank you whata

OP posts:
girlsjustlikedoingpuns · 18/12/2015 17:30

what do you mean goodnight ?

OP posts:
sinber · 18/12/2015 17:33

I think that goodnight doesn't approve.

girlsjustlikedoingpuns · 18/12/2015 17:34

ohhh! ..ok

OP posts:
sinber · 18/12/2015 17:38

I don't see the problem with a bit of upfront honesty myself, then all parties hopefully know where they stand.

Toffeelatteplease · 18/12/2015 17:43

If you are thinking carefully about it, before youve slept with him, i can pretty much guarantee it isn't for you.

I think it generally only works when they is a reason for not moving the relationship forward, eg you have kids really don't want a new relationship but miss the physical side of things.

girlsjustlikedoingpuns · 18/12/2015 17:48

So would i be able to text him? or talk to him?

OP posts:
ThreeRuddyTubs · 18/12/2015 17:49

You could text and talk to him but going out tk dinner or to the cinema etc would probably not happen whereas they would with fwb as you're supposed to be friends still

toffeeboffin · 18/12/2015 17:53

'Would I be able to text him, talk to him?'

Confused

You've a lot to learn OP.

girlsjustlikedoingpuns · 18/12/2015 17:56

So i'm glad i asked i thought there might be a difference thanks everyone!

OP posts:
abbsismyhero · 18/12/2015 17:58

basically he wants to shag you but you're not "good enough to take to meet the family" if you see what i mean you're just going to be a hook up don't expect him to even acknowledge you when you're in the same room this is not a meeting of the minds simply a meeting of the genitalia

it's not something i would do personally but each to there own xx

Hillfarmer · 18/12/2015 20:09

What a lovely guy!

Blakerose15 · 18/12/2015 20:16

Don't lower your self if he don't think your good enough for a girl friend then he entered worth your time