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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

My son said he wanted to commit suicide today

108 replies

derxa · 02/12/2015 03:09

How can I help him?

OP posts:
yakari · 02/12/2015 05:07

That I will do!

FrancisdeSales · 02/12/2015 05:20

Sorry OP I'm in a different time zone and was interrupted by dinner etc. glad to know your son has lot of family support. Keep people with him for as long as necessary. As sad as this is he was able to tell you all and get help so thank God for that xx

Original poster
derxa · 02/12/2015 05:24

Francis No need to apologise whatsoever, I feel better now and today will get going to go home Hope you had a lovely dinner x

OP posts:
KiwiJude · 02/12/2015 05:30

yes derxa, I am indeed a Kiwi. It's 6.30pm Wednesday here. Time to think of dinner and a wine (okay, the wine was poured a half hour ago... )

Original poster
derxa · 02/12/2015 05:31

I'm jealous Kiwi

OP posts:
TheEmperorIsNaked · 02/12/2015 05:36

Hopefully you're sleeping now derxa Flowers

I just wanted to give you a virtual hug and say that I'm thinking of you and DS x

TheEmperorIsNaked · 02/12/2015 05:37

Oops, sorry derxa I misinterpreted your post as a goodnight.

Original poster
derxa · 02/12/2015 05:39

Emperor Thanks No sleep here. Other DS made me a double espresso!

OP posts:
KiwiJude · 02/12/2015 06:42

Not sure if I will be able to get back tonight derxa but will be thinking of you and yours during the night. xx

Original poster
derxa · 02/12/2015 07:01

Thanks Night!

OP posts:
ScrappyMalloy · 02/12/2015 07:33

Poor you -what a shock for you. My grownup son has mental health issues, and I have been just where you are and I really feel for you.

Mine took his meds and engaged with counselling, and got better but it was frightening at the time Sad

Hold on in there

Original poster
derxa · 02/12/2015 07:44

Thanks Scrappy What can I do to help him?

OP posts:
MongooseOfDoom · 02/12/2015 08:04

Really sorry to hear what's happened but it's wonderful that your son has such a loving, supportive family around him. My dd has taken two overdoses this year, so I understand a little what you might be feeling. Maybe these people can help a bit - not sure if he's depressed but there are sections for friends and family

www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/depression/how-can-friends-and-family-help/#.Vl6kye0gGc0

www.rethink.org/carers-family-friends

Original poster
derxa · 02/12/2015 08:10

Sorry to hear about your dd Mongoose Thanks for the links. He's not been right for years and would never open up.

OP posts:
Guiltypleasures001 · 02/12/2015 08:20

Hi op

So sorry you've had quite a shock

Just by giving on the little bit you have posted, is there anything for him to do where you are?
If your rural and a farm sounds quite physical is there nothing he could be doing up there.
Getting out of his head and chasing sheep around, building or packing stuff would be helpful
For him.

Also in my experience kids teens young adults will open up in a car, mainly because they are not facing you when talking, not seeing your expression and safe in the knowledge you have to concentrate on driving seems to work magic.

Is it snowing where you are have you got a big shovel etc, if you could make him feel useful it could offset some of his guilt around uni and expenses. Thanks
,

Guiltypleasures001 · 02/12/2015 08:21

Going not giving Confused

Original poster
derxa · 02/12/2015 08:26

You're right guilty Unfortunately he's not interested. iI'm up here at my late father's farm and he's at the family home in SE Eng. Thanks for your message It means a lot

OP posts:
Roussette · 02/12/2015 08:37

derxa I've come across from the over 50's thread and I'm so sorry to hear what you are going through. I've sent you a PM.

ALaughAMinute · 02/12/2015 08:47

Sorry, no advice to give you other than what has already been said. Sending you and your family positive thoughts Flowers

bookbook · 02/12/2015 08:48

No experience of this myself derxa - just come over from the 50's thread to hand hold.
Burble ahead if you need. The only advice I can give on this is that everything is just a bit easier to deal with if you can get some sleep/rest. Worry puts my brain into overdrive.

Roussette · 02/12/2015 08:58

Yes, Derxa, use this thread to say whatever you want, someone will come along to listen and hold your hand Flowers

ThePerfect1IThinkNot · 02/12/2015 09:05

Hi Derxa, sending you massive hugs as another one from the over 50s post. I can't imagine how you are feeling right now but didn't want to just ignore.

You have already had advice from more knowledgeable people than me, but I would say the Samaritans can be really helpful.

Thinking of you x

Mehitabel6 · 02/12/2015 09:09

I came across this from the over 50 thread and just wanted to give you support. I think that the fact that he said that he wanted to is a good sign- many young men just go and do it. Hopefully it was a cry for help and time to talk. Christmas coming up a good time to take things slowly.

NoahVale · 02/12/2015 09:16

sending hugs Thanks
we are listening

Shockers · 02/12/2015 09:50

I've come over from the other thread too. Have you had word from home yet today?

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