I find it so difficult to stop myself saying what I want to say

[Twiglett]

and suck it all up and just let my mother get away with some of the things she says

In fact usually I fail and say things like "I don't need your advice" and "oh FFS mother"

why can't I grow up?

I'm the same. Can hold my tongue with anyone except my mum.

I can be honest and say what i want with most people BUT my mother!

Why should you?

Maybe say it a little more politely but say it.

I'm the only one in my family who talks straight to my mum and she respects me all the more for it.

me to Twig

I am at her heels all the time

I think what I need is a Valium for breakfast before she arrives

It makes me feel like I haven't grown up - and if I could say ffs to her I would feel more separated and independent. Which I am in practical terms because I live overseas etc etc

Oh dear me too

I find it easier now if I just go out and leave her with ds when she visits.

she enjoys it, he enjoys it, I enjoy it. Result.

my mother is powerful enough to do it all by telephone .. the winding up, the ill-considered comments, the unwarranted 'advice'

gah