The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Waving Goodbye To Summer Nights, Sipping Mocktails.

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse Welcome to the Bus. :)

Well, it would appear that Autumn is on it's way I have the heating on and can't wait to use the log burner.... shhh!

So, who are we? We're just like you. Married, single, divorced, lots of children or no children, working or a SAHM, it doesn't matter, we all breathe the same air.....

We're just trying to live our lives on the Bus, like you do each day. Well, except for one thing...

I know don't start my day with a swig, or seven, from a litre bottle of vodka (choose your poison) any longer.

And that's what has kept me here, for years now. And no doubt many more to come. Reading the stories of others struggles, wanting to say "I feel like that" or "I do that too!" but being to ashamed to be the first to put your hand up.

Well, let me reassure you here and now, there's not much that we haven't read about on here or done ourselves over the years.

We've laughed at stories of haphazard nights out, we've cried at the loss of loved ones and we've shared the pain that only an alcoholic knows when all that they want is to STOP!

Push the pause button, get off the ride, shut the door, bury yourself under the duvet for days. We've all felt that sickening feeling in our gut that makes us want to curl up and hide forever. And we've shared it all on here.

You see I don't know you and you don't know me, so we're just words on a screen to each other. Eventually, you'll get to know me more and I you, and the other fantastic Babes too, some will stay, some leave us, then some come back.

One thing I can PROMISE - here you are safe, here you won't be judged, turned away (unless you're not genuine) and we even have a huge stock of Opal Fruits but that's all down to Ma.

So, if you think we're you're kind of lovely bunch of people to help you stop drinking, slow down, hold your hand while you decide what to do, then come find a seat!

OUR MOST RECENT THREAD

AND A VERY SOBERING READ, THAT LEAD TO THE BIRTH OF THE THREADS THAT FOLLOWED

Thank you ladies. lifesavers

I can't go with him unfortunately. It's a trip I just cannot be with him on and am not willing to ask him to not go on. Can't really say why without outing.

I suppose maybe there are options (we have a dog I cannot board for example), but they all seem to lead to humiliation I don't want. I have a couple of days to think. Perhaps I should just put it out there and ask. A neighbour might be willing to look after the dog and if I was honest, again, with my mother she may help with the expense of flights.

I'm speaking to my friend shortly and will discuss further. I think I might fall apart left to my own. The other option is to ask my Doctor for more support in that time, which I think he would be open to. I think I have to do something because I can see it all falling to shit if I don't.

25 years of alcohol abuse is not an easy feat to overcome.

One day at a time yes?

I'm so happy my liver is still working. I was soooo scared today.

Sounds like you are doing well thinking through the options. I would seriously consider asking that neighbour. Can the dog stay with your mum?

Ok, so my BF can't come or have me due to visitors. That leaves family. I cannot do that. I tried before at a low, I'm just too private, I find it too hard. My Mum is wonderful, but it would be so hard. I want to curl into a ball at the thought of asking her. I'm on my own here. I'm going to reach out to the Doctor tomorrow for further help during that time.

I have B Vit and diazepam in the meantime. I'm going to ask the Doc for assistance next week. There must be somewhere somewhere he can send for support.

I don't feel like AA would be for me, and there are no daily meetings around which won't help.

battle, well done for reaching out for help. I know its not easy, but smetimes we all need it. I'm sure your friend would be happy to help you out.

pop, how are you feeling now about the other night? Your "friend" sounds like a cow to be honest. Very glad to hear that your Dad is doing better.

How is pup sweet? Not so much of a pup now I bet!

mrs, it is such a familiar tale isn't it. Why can't we be "normal" drinkers. Its just not fair!

Thank you for the lovely welcome back. It made me quite emotional.

I've discovered M&S French soda as an AF option. Currently on the spiced berry but also love the lemon and hibiscus. They make a nice change from endless fizzy water.

sorry battle, it took me so lonmg to type, that you'd updated about your friend. Speaking to the Dr sounds like the way to go - let us know what s/he has to say.

anne apologies, I meant to congratulate you on all the bottles ypou haven't drunk. Well done!

Thanks for checking in with me april. God I am still reeling about the friend - yes , she certainly seems to have bovine tendencies but we've been mates for seven years or so I thought. It still stings a lot and during the week we normally have a cuppa on out not working days so I'm nervous to see how this week will go as I suspect neither of us will be suggesting it. Can't quite believe she faked the whole friendship though! How do people do that? And I keep having flashback of what a terrible twat I was being in her kitchen. At one point I fell over. I must have been in a terrible state - but can't help feeling they should have gently sent me home not ripped into me. So horrid.
battle the doc might refer you for an in patient detox if you feel you could face one. That's probably the safest most supportive option but it does leave you needing a lot of support to stay sober the other side and that might seem too scary right now. You don't have to be sober to go to AA and if you find the right meeting that could work for a few weeks to test it out and get some additional support? I know you seem against telling your mum but it could be a real turning point? My mum is mean cold critical and unsupportive I could never turn to her which I think is part of my problem. Perhaps she would be relieved you'd turned to her for help? Anyway, hope none of those options sound too nuclear if you know what I mean ....

How are day two -ers doing out there? I'm about to have cup of tea and bed. Then on to day three. It's been a while!

April (please can someone remind me how to bold!) Glad you're back - I don't post much even when things are going well, even less likely to when I'm not, so well done on getting back on board.
Battle, well done for posting, it's a scary place to be ( I mean the thought of not drinking, not the bus ) but the support on here is brilliant and the fact that everyone "gets" it. Families can be supportive, but they've not been in our shoes ( in most cases.) Even when you don't feel up to posting, keep reading.

Pop am almost on day 2, will let you know tomorrow! Enjoy a lovely sober sleep and waking up bright-eyed and bushy-tailed to day 3.

Go mrsm. anne great to see you. To bold pop a star before and after the name. Get me , being a veteran and all!

Welcome new babes (and long time lurkers).
anne to make things bold you do a *

then without any spaces type the word (or words)

Thank you everyone. Considering options.

You are all so brave and reading your stories gives me strength and hope.

Thank you.

then without a space do another *

Anne OK - sorry I had to do that in 3 posts, but if I didn't, all you'd get would be my instructions in bold without the little *

Thank you Venus

Just like I lied to everyone around me for years about the drinking. That's standard isn't it? I can be so sneaky, so deceptive. And I can drink a reasonable amount without anyone being able to even tell... I could down 2 bottles of wine and most people wouldn't be able to even notice.

Oh BATTLE I so get that phrase... that was me

I agree with others that 10 days on reduced alcohol could be a challenge. Are there situations where you could imagine yourself not drinking much e.g. if you were enrolled on a dance course, or a writing course. or if you volunteered to 'babysit' for en elderly person who's family were going on holiday (sort of like in-house respite).... I'm thinking here of a situation where your internal sense of responsibility and control would be stronger than your drive to drink....

Hey - you got it...

I'm off to bed. battle please let us know how you get on and remember that the bus is always here. Halloween sweets and all round.

Morning All.

Sorry I wasn't here last night, I started to post when I got home, but my computer/the internet didn't want to play.

So, Battle welcome to the bus. You have done the biggest and bravest thing, admitted you have a problem and have asked for help. Now, you have to hoik up those big girl pants, and keep asking. You GP sounds helpful and sympathetic, that's where you should start if you really can't face your family. I hope you're able to sort something out, because 10 days is a long time.

April, Pup is now a fully fledged, grotty teenager . He has become a very handsome (if slightly scruffy) dog, and is a real hit with everyone when he comes to work with me - he either sleeps under my desk, or stands on a chair at my window and watches the squirrels. He is going for a trim tomorrow, so I'll try and get a good pic of him then.

Have a good day everyone, hope it's easy to keep the wine witch away, just for one day.

Day three. Mood so much better. Hope and strength to all babes.

Glad to hear it pop!

My mood is in my boots, it's just been one of those mornings. Nothing dramatic and I'm sure it will all be better after a coffee.

I will not be drinking today

Have a coffee and breathe april . Take a bit of time to count the good things. You've helped me out no end - I'm not feeling amazing either but just appreciating the small things - I'm not drinking , the DP took the kids to school today so I could steal a march on work , okay , so it's raining , but my brain does not ache from alcohol and I can remember things. That'll do just for now. There are a tonne of worries up ahead but just for now I can face today with my chin up. I've had days where I've thought my brain is just unable to function and I worry about the effects all of my drinking has had. On me , on family, on friends and on my children. Really want to start putting that right.