The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Waving Goodbye To Summer Nights, Sipping Mocktails.

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse Welcome to the Bus. :)

Well, it would appear that Autumn is on it's way I have the heating on and can't wait to use the log burner.... shhh!

So, who are we? We're just like you. Married, single, divorced, lots of children or no children, working or a SAHM, it doesn't matter, we all breathe the same air.....

We're just trying to live our lives on the Bus, like you do each day. Well, except for one thing...

I know don't start my day with a swig, or seven, from a litre bottle of vodka (choose your poison) any longer.

And that's what has kept me here, for years now. And no doubt many more to come. Reading the stories of others struggles, wanting to say "I feel like that" or "I do that too!" but being to ashamed to be the first to put your hand up.

Well, let me reassure you here and now, there's not much that we haven't read about on here or done ourselves over the years.

We've laughed at stories of haphazard nights out, we've cried at the loss of loved ones and we've shared the pain that only an alcoholic knows when all that they want is to STOP!

Push the pause button, get off the ride, shut the door, bury yourself under the duvet for days. We've all felt that sickening feeling in our gut that makes us want to curl up and hide forever. And we've shared it all on here.

You see I don't know you and you don't know me, so we're just words on a screen to each other. Eventually, you'll get to know me more and I you, and the other fantastic Babes too, some will stay, some leave us, then some come back.

One thing I can PROMISE - here you are safe, here you won't be judged, turned away (unless you're not genuine) and we even have a huge stock of Opal Fruits but that's all down to Ma.

So, if you think we're you're kind of lovely bunch of people to help you stop drinking, slow down, hold your hand while you decide what to do, then come find a seat!

OUR MOST RECENT THREAD

AND A VERY SOBERING READ, THAT LEAD TO THE BIRTH OF THE THREADS THAT FOLLOWED

I did all of September and so far had an AF October so that's a grand total of 49 days and I've lost 7lbs. Yippee!

I lost 5lbs in September then the scales kept bobbing up and down for a couple of weeks (why do they do that?) before settling back so I think I can safely say that this half stone is going to stay off now

That was my first target. Tick

Need to set a new one now.

Can I do today with you as well? Really struggling....

Faire, that's brilliant

Pop, of course you can. Anything particularly bothering you?

Hello all , can I join you ?

I have probably had two non drinking days in as many months which is a bit rubbish . I don't always have that much , maybe two vodka and cokes or two bottles of beer in the week and then more at the weekend .

But I know that it is too much , it is too frequent and I am sure I would feel a bit more together and cheery if I had a lot more alcohol free days .

I am going to read back over the thread and see what you are all up to , but thought I should say hi before hand .

Hey sweet thanks for asking. The whole high school thing is looming and I've been crap at resisting the solace of alcohol. And like many of us once I start I can't stop. I was facilitating an AA talk as part of my job last week and heard the twelve steppers talking about being powerless over their drinking and it really struck a chord. They were talking about facing your feelings without alcohol and how hard that can be. But somehow I cannot seem to put drinking down and once I start I will have the whole bottle and more. The hard bit is that I can function well enough - do job kids friends etc - but the grumpiness and tiredness and headaches and lack of energy makes me feel I'm just throwing away good experiences of life for my whole family. Gosh sorry what a miserable post. Anyway , hAd some chocolate and am going to make a nice spicy chilli beef Thai salad for tea

faire meant to ask - what kick started you for your fantastic 49 days ?

Welcome, Howlong, these things do creep up on us, and if it feels like a problem, then it is. We are all on board for the same reason, but often with very different starting points. We all try to identify when and why we pick up that first drink, it's the only one you need to worry about. Jump on, and join the silliness, the seriousness, and the support.

Pop, that sounds like a tough gig. Don't forget to be nice to yourself, you've had an awful lot on recently; can you bargain with yourself, something nice just for you if you can be AF for just a day?

Work, how are you getting on?

Hi all,

Have spent the day reading the threads and feeling a lot more hopeful this evening having read them. I am absolutely a problem drinker at the moment and would love some support to be able to say 'Day 1 done' some day in the very near future. The thought of giving up altogether frightens the life out of me tbh :( Feel like I've lost myself in the last few years.

It will be 5 beers tonight and I want it to be less tomorrow!

Hi, Holly, can you stop for tonight? If there's any beer in the glass, chuck it away. But don't think about forever, just the rest of the evening.

Hi Sweet, I can't stop for tonight as I need to sleep at least a bit so that I can get DD to creche in the morning. Didn't manage that today :( I'm on meds for anxiety and have counselling tomorrow so need to make sure I can get her in. Ugh - looks so terrible when I see it written down :/

Don't, beat yourself up, Holly, we have all been there, or are still there . You need to make some plans for tomorrow, have alternatives to drink, make them as interesting and special as you can. Get yourself some lovely things to eat, and don't skimp on the sweets; you will crave sugar.

to begin with, just think about not drinking for the next minute, or hour, those little bits soon add up. If you can get to a few days, you will sleep better.

It's not easy, but this is the most understanding, supportive place I know, keep posting, someone will be here.

Thanks so much Sweet - I'm going to 'fess up to the councillor tomorrow about the drinking. I was raised in an extremely unhealthy environment with a chronic alcoholic so admitting I am one is so difficult. the shame associated with it is almost unbearable. I just feel like such a terrible person because of it :(

You're, not a terrible person Holly, you are admitting your problems and taking steps to deal with them. I expect that 'fessing up will be extremely emotional, but if you have a good councillor, it will be a step in the right direction.

Thanks (again!) Sweet

This time tomorrow evening I hope to be back here having had less (or nothing) to drink. Being able to talk about it here without being judged has been a revelation tbh!

It's an awesome little haven, snuggle down and stick with us.

I'm turning in for the night, sweet dreams, all.

Welcome holly. You are very brave to be here. Step one is admitting you have a problem and that things are out of control. If you can talk to your counsellor that would be fantastic ! Try and remember that drinking feeds your anxiety and vice versa. It seems hard to believe but drinking can make you more anxious although it seems to help at the time. Try and have one beer less tomorrow. If you have trouble sleeping or feel too awful when you don't drink you might need some help to stop. We are here for you. You are on the right track.

Well done to day oners out there. Well done to anyone contemplating day one tomorrow. Together we can do this.

Thanks for such a lovely message popstar - I know what you mean about the anxiety, I spent this morning crying on the phone to my boss of all people

I've taken great inspiration from the threads that i've read today and talked with DP about them. I'm committed to cutting down and maybe cutting out altogether - just need some support from people who know where i'm coming from i suppose? I hate myself so much that it can be very hard to hear criticism from others :(

You need to be kind and give yourself a break holly. And that doesn't mean drinking it means giving your body and soul some AF time and nourishment to detox and relax. Alcohol is a severe depressant. Try some fresh air and good food. Treat yourself to a massage. Hate is a wasted emotion. Don't go there. Try to look forward and put things right. You can start tomorrow. Or now. Cup of tea, bed, tomorrow is another day , as scarlet o'hara said.

Ps. Great to have your DP on side. That's such a bonus.

I'm going to go to bed very soon popstar just hope i can get some of the elusive sleep! DP is snoring on the couch beside me - he's so worried about me but trying not to criticise too much. i can see the toll it's taking on him and it scares me.

Will definitely have less tomorrow and hopefully nothing the next day. I always feel better after the counselling, just horrific in the build up to it. Getting fresh air is a real struggle as the anxiety is a real obstacle to leaving the house atm. My little girl doesn't even ask to go outside when she's with me any more and i feel sh*t about that.

Tomorrow will have to be a better day....

Hey babes. Holly welcome, you have found the right place. Hope you get some sleep tonight (make a nice milky drink to mark a full stop to the beer, and maybe read something light if you can't switch off). I hope the counselling goes well tomorrow. Pop back and let us know how you are.

HowLong welcome to you too! What's your plan? Are you going to go AF or just try to have a few non-drinking days a week for now? You will get lots of support here (and Opal Fruits now a certain Ma is away in Poland!)

Erm, oh, hello Ma . I am wondering what you are up to in Krakow. Will you bring us back some of that ? Hope you have found some nice amber jewellery and treated yourself. Amber and silver is my favourite too. (green amber is also nice). I love that it's been around since prehistoric days. I really want to find some amber with a prehistoric insect set in it.

(hope that doesn't make me sound creepy, but I love insects. I am the one who kindly picks up the spiders on Gerald, pats them gently and sets them free with a cheery 'there you go pal' so the arachnophobic babes don't scare them with their screams! )

Mouse you make your home life sound so cosy and snuggly. Hope you and Nemo get a good night's sleep

Faire am very jealous about the weight loss, as I have hardly had a drink (except when i was away last week) since the start of September myself but remain stubbornly fat Well done though, half a stone is great, I think that's the stage when you start to notice a difference in how your clothes fit. Not congratulating myself on the AF bit though as simply too tired and busy all the time rather than exercising self control . For tea tonight I had a few salted peanuts and a bottle of water which were all I had in the car while waiting for DS to finish training. Had to dash out straight after work and then got in too late for a proper tea. Wish I were better at planning ...

Sweet, Popstar, Isinde, and everyone else lurking out there, hope all is well in your world. I have been having a rant after reading a ridiculous article in the Guardian about black tights. I actually wondered if it was some sort of post-modern joke, but the journalist has been guilty of this sort of crap before. Made me despair. As if wearing tights or not denotes your age, social class, finances or political leanings. Bollocks (excuse the language). For me it just means either my work trousers needed ironing and I had to find a skirt (tights on), or I got up late and couldn't be arsed rooting through the drawer to find a pair without holey toes (tights off, wore unironed trousers). Bah!

You can read it here if you fancy a rant... Ridiculous Article from Guardian

Night babes x

Morning.

Good god, Hope, why did I click the link and give that smug, ridiculous woman my time? I'm going with bright pink tights today, but only because I need to buy new black ones.

In a bit of a rush this morning, so will be back later to name check.

I love that you own pink tights Sweet

Greetings all. Yes, I managed to treat myself to some new earrings at one of the many many amber shops here. I want them all.... I haven't seen any opal fruits yet though so am having to eat lots of cake instead. It's tough...