"What's your job situation?"

[NoMoreMrRight]

How would feel if someone you've just started messaging online dating asked you the above on their second ever message to you (and their first question about you)?.

I have 3DC which I've briefly mentioned on my profile. My profile is eloquent, smart book choices etc but admittedly no mention on my profession.

Trying to ascertain if I'm being too defensive/jaded (likely; been OLD for over two years and have mostly encountered vanishers/liars) and wrong in wanting someone who doesn't think that what I do for a living defines me and/or is primarily interested in how much I earn.

I did previously say that I was now officially divorced as of three months ago though, even added a wink to show it's not an issue.

He was recently separated himself, apparently only left his marriage end of last year. If anything it would be me the one not taking the risk

Tbh I'd be put off someone who said their divorce was so challenging they'd taken voluntary time off work. That looks like a whole shitstorm to run for the hills over! No offence intended, I have a different impression "talking" to you hear. But OLD - I'd run.

He's still a nob though, for "high flying"!

If you wrote that a man said he was taking time off to recover from a divorce, you'd get told to leave it. Someone requiring time off from work due to a former relationship does not sound ready to meet someone else

Going through a separation myself I sympathise. But I've never heard of anyone taking time off though - seems very drastic (we're all different of course).

There is a mid point between your first response and the last! Go for that next time Best of luck

ps I don't think he sounds a jerk

He was polite and responded, and wished you luck

What were you expecting in response to your sabbatical thing?

The divorce thing. It's basically due to not being able to afford childcare for 3DC; divorce related as XH doesn't pay much towards their upkeep thus forcing me to take time off.

Probably worded wrong in this instance but I've never encountered any issues about this when OLD (from both high earners and not so high earners). It is clear that I do have a career, just taking a temporary break due to circumstances. Never had any issues with this, apart from this guy.

Agree hair
If I was reading a similar thing I'd probably wish luck and continue search.

Asking about what someone does for living is a conversation starter however you phrase it and can tell lots about people. Someone in construction may have a different way of living to someone in IT. I guess any questions asked initially are to measure compatibility anyways and some questions could be career related.

He might be boasting about his job but your response was very rude. I would have replied with the same thing, seems like a decent response. As some PP said, I like people who do jobs that make them happy or at least satisfied.