Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Have I gone mental?

69 replies

LoveLetters · 31/05/2015 12:47

Morning sickness starting yesterday 6 weeks pregnant. Spent all this morning puking. Thought of anything dairy is making me heave. Dh thinks it hilarious to keep making references to dairy which is making it worse for me. I've asked him to stop but he just carries on to the point where I'm really getting angry. He then goes upstairs to the toilet. 30 mins later I decide to get lunch ready. Cooking sausages really start to make me feel ill, trying to get my 2 kids to tidy up while I struggle to cook. Dawns on me he has disappeared. Go upstairs and he is just lying on the bed watching TV. Ask him to come downstairs to help. I go back to cooking and 5 mins go by... He hasn't even moved. It took a lot of persuading to get me pregnant again, he wanted a third child so much and I asked him to step up and help me if we did. Promises promises and now his behaviour has told me he isn't going to do anything. I lost it... Told him I don't like him, I'm now trapped with three kids and how I'll never be able to get away from him. He is always miserable and now I'm stuck with a miserable idiot. I feel so angry at myself for getting into this situation. I even slammed the frying pan on the oven. Which gave him another excuse to have a go at me. I feel like a mess

OP posts:
woowoo22 · 31/05/2015 13:04

He's a cock for the dairy references.

What was he like before pg?

pieceofpurplesky · 31/05/2015 13:07

Why did you get pregnant before he has proved he could step up? Surely he should have proved himself first?
The dairy thing is disgusting. Tell him he needs to grow up or piss off?!

Original poster
LoveLetters · 31/05/2015 13:08

Ok. Always goes on about he works blah blah and my job is the kids. Now I just feel like I have trapped myself. 2 kids I could have got my own place but two and a newborn I couldn't manage on my own financially. I such a fool. Can't stop crying.

OP posts:
Original poster
LoveLetters · 31/05/2015 13:09

He does this. He doesn't know when to end a joke. He did it with my daughter the other day. Kept pretending to eat her toys and bite them... She got so wound up she didn't know what to do and bit him. He then had a go at Her for biting him. Idiot

OP posts:
woowoo22 · 31/05/2015 13:11

You would manage on your own. Do you work?

Was he like this in previous pregnancies?

colafrosties · 31/05/2015 13:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

QuiteLikely5 · 31/05/2015 13:11

Is abortion an option?

SlaggyIsland · 31/05/2015 13:11

Are you certain you want this baby? You're only six weeks along.

colafrosties · 31/05/2015 13:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
LoveLetters · 31/05/2015 13:13

No. I have a little job but it's not enough to pay for rent, bills, food etc.
He was a bit yes, and this is why I told him I didn't want another one unless he stepped up. Which he promised he would support me etc. It was all crap

OP posts:
Original poster
LoveLetters · 31/05/2015 13:14

I don't know if I could abort.

OP posts:
Original poster
LoveLetters · 31/05/2015 13:17

I've just sent him a message asking him to leave as I need some space

OP posts:
woowoo22 · 31/05/2015 13:20

Good for you.

Have a look at entitledto.com which shows how much tax credits etc you would be entitled to (obviously).

If you've repeatedly said he needs to step up and he's not doing so when the baby's not even here yet...

Being horrible to you when you have morning sickness is very cruel.

heylilbunny · 31/05/2015 13:22

Also your DH being an idiot while you feel completely crap with morning sickness is not the end of the world. We have 3 and my DH could be so hardhearted during my pregnancies but ultimately he is a good guy and we are happily married. People are not perfect and morning sickness is crap. I would start making some practical plans like DH HAS to take the kids out to the park to give you a rest etc.

Being furious doesn't mean you have to end your relationship - that sounds like hormones. Give yourself a break - go and lie on the bed yourself!

And we wouldn't be without number 3, we all love him so much.

Original poster
LoveLetters · 31/05/2015 13:23

Thanks so much

He response is: I'd really like you to leave for the night

Its just a joke to him. I really dislike him right now. Not sure if I'm over reacting with my hormones

OP posts:
heylilbunny · 31/05/2015 13:24

Sorry, my point is you don't have to go from zero to LTB.

heylilbunny · 31/05/2015 13:25

I think you all need to put a movie on and put your feet up. Something funny.

woowoo22 · 31/05/2015 13:33

You asked him to leave and he's said he wants you to leave?

heylilbunny · 31/05/2015 13:41

Because he's not taking her seriously. OP is he really a miserable idiot? Then why did you choose to have another child? Or are you just having a horrible day and need a change of scene?

mojo17 · 31/05/2015 13:48

You are obviously having a terrible day, as I see it you could either
Seriously talk to him on your own , get a babysitter and go somewhere to have a serious talk with laying it on the line.
Ask him if he's prepared for a split, or for the pregnancy to end?
Leave now, take the kids and just go and stay with your family or q friend until he rings you to sort it out
Discontinue with the pregnancy

Inexperiencedchick · 31/05/2015 13:58

He is just playing with you.

Guess he is very happy for the no.3...

Can you take it easier?

twistletonsmythe · 31/05/2015 13:59

he sounds hideous. If he refuses to leave could you? Is house rented or owned?

heylilbunny · 31/05/2015 14:11

Can you all calm down. Why does a DH being a twit have to mean the whole family has to break up? I think there has to be a few more solutions tried before that.

VanitasVanitatum · 31/05/2015 14:15

Maybe take him at his word and go stay with a friend/your mum/at a hotel for the night? Leave him to look after the house and kids for a bit, come back in time for him to leave for work?

FeckTheMagicDragon · 31/05/2015 14:16

Why don't you? Go somewhere else for the night I mean. Leave him to it. See if a friend will put you up for the night. Then just text home 'ok' and go. Obviously send the kids upstairs to him first.