What is the worst thing that MIL has done/said to you?

[Ilovemyboy]

A negative thread I know but this nasty lady is in my head at the moment.

Need to know I'm not alone.

The worst thing MIL has done to me is sent DP a v.long email detailing each and every thing that she thinks is wrong with me and told him I am trying to rip their family apart.

Another corker was she told us, when I was 6 weeks pregnant, that our baby was a bad idea.

I could go on...

I can't believe some of your MILs. Some shocking stories.

Nuttygirl - well done you! I sent my MIL and FIL an email explaining how upset I was and they refuse to see that they have done anything wrong. They have turned it all around and made themselves the victims by being upset at the 'tone' of my email...regardless of the fact it was in reaction to their disgusting behaviour.

I don't think I will ever be friendly with them again. I don't know how I can even bring myself to be civil with them. They will come to our house pre-xmas to see our baby AKA 'the bad idea' who is due to be born in the next few weeks.

I am dreading it.

Know what you mean wannaBe1974. My MIL talks about DH's ex as being a "beautiful girl, all that gorgeous dark hair and olive sking" (I'm very fair, with strawberry blonde hair). Then FIL says, "Yes, I don't like all that peaches and cream complection. You can hold on to all that English Rose nonsense" (again pretty much summing up my complection).

..that she "much preferred little boys" after the birth of our second child, our DD and her one and only grandaughter

and that she has made no effort to see either of her grandchild for the past 12 months..... (see's other older grandchildren all the time !!)

said "oh, that'll put paid to your sports coaching" when we went around to announce our pregnancy (bitch)

..when she didn't send DD a birthday present this year...until 8 weeks after the event (she sent a card but no excuse on the date then)

All this from a so called devout and church going christian who has no ties financially (they're loaded !!!), who is retured and in good health.....

..meant retired. woops !!!

MIL a lovely woman but sadly died before we had the DDs. Now my step-MIL... Too many stories to tell here, but my favourite is ringing me up one day to accuse me of rummaging in her cupboard and stealing her financial paperwork under the pretext of having a rest. Her reasoning was that she couldn't find it so I must have stolen it! But I guess even that pales in comparison to forcing my lovely FIL, in the last weeks as he was dying of cancer, to change his will and leave his share of their house to her on the promise that she would in turn leave it to DH and his brother when she died. DH and I were there when she made the promise. Did she mean it? Did she Hell! The only good thing was that she was too stupid to dissemble and within 6 months of FIL's death it became absolutely clear that she had no intention of honoring her promise, she revealed herself as the EMIL that she truly was and I never had to see her again.

2nd meeting ever, she said "you've put on weight, haven't you? Yes, I can see it quite a lot around your face"...!?!

recently, while pregnant with my first child, she said "well if I were you I would go private, because of your age, you're a high risk (I'm 37 FFS!!) you dont' have many years left either, do you..."

Endless. but its all about stupidity - she is missing that synapse between the impulse to say stupid things and the place in the brain which has tact. ITs like she has no internal censor.

It sometimes drives me nuts, but most of the time now I just avoid her completely, keep out of the way. Her loss.

My MUM, so not MIL but SIL's MIL IYSWIM when being phoned with the news of her first grandchild,
"what have you called her?"
"Ebony"
"Is she black?"
Poor SIL was mortified and my brother is furious.

Message withdrawn

mine is very nice apart from the fact that she is so supremely self-confident that whenever she visits, she makes me feel like the most inept mother/wife on earth. Its impossible to explain, and we do get on well but ...why do I always feel like crap afterwards? My close friends know this and spend the following weeks bolstering my confidence! The only other thing I can really complain about is that she favours my sons over my daughter. Even dh gets pissed off over this one.

God i feel so sorry for you ladies who put up with the crap your MIL's dish out.

Mine isn't nasty as such.just not interested in dp or my wonderful kids.

Doesn't visit on their birthdays despite living 5 mins drive away.Puts a card thru the door when we are out or comes when she knows they will be at school.Twat!!!

latest is we have decided(thanks to YG's thread) to get married(after 18 yrs and 4 children).
Phones her at her home abroad(where they live for 6 months of the year) to tell her and she says she doesn't know if they will be home on time.We get married on the 10th and they normally come home at the end of the month.

I bloody hope they don't come back for it

said she didnt want half caste grand children. told me it doesnt matter what job i do as dh will always be the main bread winner, as I am his lacky basically so not important. told me I am not right in the head - entered a church with me at sil wedding told me where there were sitting ie at front and told me just to sit anywhere. then I was expected to just ask a stranger for a lift to the reception as she and family all went in paid for cars including bf (now dh). I could go on all night

YUk to that one!

Mine complained on my ds birthday that I didnt come down to help enough at his party when I had delivered my little dd at 3.15am at home! They were three years apart on the same day and I couldnt not have his party and had done all the food in the morning at 7am!! We had 8 little boys playing in the house and I came down three times to help!

Man! My MIL seems like an angel compared to some of yours.. you poor things! Trouble is very often DH or DP don´t stick up for us to their parents which makes it worse.

When we first got together they thought the sun shone out of my... bottom! They couldn´t praise me enough and buy me enough presents, etc. They even called me their DIL whilst we were still in the early stages of dating. Then it all changed because their ex DIL was witholding visits of their grand children from them and they turned against me.

I found out that they had bad-mouthed me to DH´s exW no less! Of all people!!! She (the ex) took much pleasure in telling me over the phone that FIL had said he couldn´t stand me and that I was a moody cow. Also PIL often had her and boyfriend round for Sunday dinner even though she had accused my DH of child abuse when we first got together to try and stop us seeing the children. FIL had previously said he would run her over if he ever saw her out because of what she put my DH through. Now he was sharing a table with her!

MIL also once said (whilst looking after my DD for a couple of hours) that she called her a fat cow (when she was reprimanded for something). This is so untrue as my DD adored her and wouldn´t dream of speaking to an adult this way!

That following Christmas a card was received by us from them with the printed words on the front "JUST FOR YOU SON" talk about spell it out for you! Then BIL sent an engagement invitation addressed to just DH and not me.. it got ripped up... by me!

Not half as evil as some of your MILs but still not nice.

I asked my MIL if she would have ds just one day a week to help with childcare costs, to which she replied 'i believe that if you have children you should stay at home to look after them'

also dh tells me that this week she told him I look very sick and ill after losing over a stone in weight from going to the gym and working hard, this is clearly because shes a big fat miserable cow!!!

My MIL is nice, but threads like this just astonish me - how awful some people can be.

Not MIL, but the racist comments remind me of my great-uncle, who used to sit in his room overlooking the park. One day he turned to me with a despondent face and said "There aren't any people in the park today. Just Pakistanis..."

Ah these threads are my specialty

there's laods to put but my 'fave' is when she rang DH afeter a failed suicide attempt and yelled at him that he ahd no problems, he should hear hers.... and then proceeded to describe them in detail . He had V severe depression, now recovered.

There's been loads thpough: like her trying to get our wedding cancelled by phonong round the suppliers, faking a severe illness at the wedding, when FIL left her telling my boys (DS2 was 3) that FIL hit her (untrue), expecting DH to up and leave us to pay her mortgage and keep her company once she was alone. Ordering us to abort ds3 when we were told he MAY have downs Syndrome (he doesn't, though possibly does other SN); trefusing to acknow;edge 'The mutant' (Our AS ds1) after dx.....

We don't have contact now. Can you guess whY?

My MIL announced that our house was so dirty if we ever had children they would probably die!!!!!!

Well, now we have 2 DS who are very much alive!

She was a bit pissed at the time, and I don't know if she remembers saying it! I was speechless.

She is btw a very lovely lady and we get on pretty well!

well I lovemyboy I don't know if some of the horrors we have as MILs have helped you feel any better...

Your MIL sounds fairly destructive.

I hope you're ok

my mil had a stand up row with my dp when our son was 2 weeks old as she was annoyed she wasnt being given time to bond with her grandchild!! this was in spite of the fact that I was in hospital for 6days after the birth and in the 8 days I had been out had seen her 3 times for about an hour a time. I was raging and if hadnt been so exhausted might have lamped her! Claimed she was playing "second fiddle" to my parents cos my mum had been round at my house every day to help me with housework and help me establish bf. Shes a nutter but thankfully my dp realises this. lol

Have to say I think SILs are actually worse! My SIL (dps sister) went in a huff and still isnt speaking to me after I wouldnt "give her a shot" of my ds who was ill at the time (was feverish, clingy and was trying to encourage him to bf by having lots of skin to skin!)

Ah now I have no SIL, thankfully- those I know of from friends are horrors! have BIL's, both a little on the odd side but harmless enough.
Dh's brother is still living with MIL- won't ever get away now I think. Also, I saw MIL groping him so not sure I want to delve too deeply into their lifestyle

Mine can have her moments, but i will never forget the way she looked after me after i just had my son. Of course i didnt appreciate it at time, but i am grateful. I keep thinking that if she brought up my DH who is so loving and brilliant to me, she cant be all bad.

my MIL is awful, after years and years of histrionics and manipulation (she would tell us and my BIL and SIL different versions of the same story to get the reaction she wanted, involve herself in other people's health problems, etc), my DH told her that enough was enough. She acted all innocent so her gave her a few examples, one of which involved me and not him. I was 5 months pregnant with her first grandxhild at the time, and she sent me the most vicious e-mail accusing me of "doing this to her" and somehow managing to blame me for all her bad behaviour, saying this is on my conscience if I dont resolve it etc... I got such a shock (I have always done so much for her) and ended up really upset. Of course my DH was furious and e-mailed her telling her to not contact me again whilst pregnant, and to this day we have not heard from her, stubborn old bat. DS is 4 months. She always told us not to have children because she didn't want to be a grand mother, so I guess she is getting what she wants. She is such a negative person, you could almost see her britsling (SP?), and you never left seeing her or speaking to her in a good mood.... so I think it has happened for a reason, none of her negative influence in my son's life. Very sad that is has come to this tho.
Worst of all? I think she is actually enjoying this because she believes that I am this evil person who has done this to her, so she can go around telling anyone else who will listen what a victim she is. Argh!

my mil started off fine it wasn't until she realised how serious dh & i's (obviously not dh then!) relationship was did she start to feel threatened, i was taking her ds away from her even though he was 27! since then she has been overbearing and twisted situations to suit her, playing the victim!
recently she offered to babysit if i wanted to go shopping one afternoon, i said i'm fine thanks, she then asked if we wanted to go out one night they could also babysit & i said thanks we'll bare you in mind, we received an email saying that they were so upset that we didn't want them to babysit and the clothes they had bought ds we didn't like although we never said anything of the sort we thanked them & said they'll be nice & warm for the winter.
thankfully my dh also can see through her & my mothers ways of trying to make you feel guilty over issues generally related to ds but sometimes just in general.
your attitude is all!

My MIL patted my tummy and said 'you've got a bit of a belly - or is there another baby in there?'

I'd only given birth to my second baby just three months before!

this is a good thread for a monday morning...

Ilovemyboy, I know how you feel as I am just about to open a new thread about my 'problem' (won't post here as don't want to hijack interested in MN's opinions)