The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Shaping Up For A Super, Sober Summer!

[Mouseface]

Hey, I'm Mouse

This is 'Gerald', our trustworthy, non judgemental Bus, full of a variety of posters who have travelled long and far, or even just joined us a few stops ago.

This is a place where you can be who YOU want to be. 24/7, 365. This lovely place is just like your best friend, there's no slagging off, no judging, just us.

Drinking or not, embarrassed, fed up of the way things are, or just lonely of living the way drinking makes you do, come and take a peek and see what you think.....

THIS THE LAST THREAD WE HAD

AND THIS IS WHERE THE BUS WAS BUILT, WHERE IT ALL BEGAN

We can't wait to meet you, we won't bite! Well, unless you ask very nicely.

Take good care until we see you. :) xx

Hi Babes

Ruby, Andy - specially big hugs and for you both. You have not let anyone down, listen to the wise and spotty wonderful Guggs.

Take a seat on the bus, grab some sparkly soft drinks and enjoy the sunshine. We are here to help if you want to chat

I don't do AA either but I know it helps a lot of people. Sure others can advise, hope it goes well for you Andy if you go...

Ma, I'm not a medical person, sorry, but hopefully someone wise will be along in a minute. Why don't you take her to the hospital for a check up? Hope she is OK, maybe it's just adjusting to the beta blockers, but I really don't know. We need nurse Wry back. Big hugs for you lovely.

Spanna I don't live in London babe, or else the bookshops of Charing Cross would be an ideal treat for me, but have just come back from a run (a RUN, Khalisi !! Yay! ) and am going to grab a shower and some lunch and then take myself shopping for a new phone.

Hope you all have nice plans for the weekend. Ds is away with his team again, so I am off to see Pitch Perfect 2 with dd and have some lunch out and a mooch round town.

Work still horrid so I have turned off my phone and am ignoring them all. Hard to type from down here with a head full of sand, but don't care

Waves at Isinde, Small, Mouse & everybody.

Ma could your dd ring up NHS direct (or whatever you have) and explain her symptoms?

I have seen her now and she seems ok, but very weary. However, that's the effect of the b blockers. I just cannot cope with any more stress - dad being moved possibly today into a new care home, car stuck at garage as they ahd ordered wrong size tyres, still having scary fanjo problems and waiting to see consultant on 25th.
Mums 80th birthday weekend too, which is nice, but trying to organise catering and cake and gifts etc on top of everything else.....

Ma you have a lot to deal with, glad your dd is ok, is she due to see a doctor?

I should have been more aware last night as I have been feeling strange this week which could be because I ran out of my ad's on Saturday and had to wait until Tuesday to get more - my bad planning. I suffer with anxiety but have been feeling pretty great recently until this week. I was starting to feel rough on Tuesday and irritable for no reason. Yesterday I was pissed off cos I looked so awful - I can't believe how old I look and I had watery eyes and red patches on my face. I went on a leaving do last night with quite a few people from my old job where the managers are mostly bullies and I was really dreading going but forced myself to go because I really like the person who's leaving. Well I just got really drunk to deal with the situation . Wish I could deal with stuff better. I have a fear of speaking too it's well weird

I love this thread allowing me to waffle on as much as I please

Ma

As you know Nemo has cardiac issues and was on beta blockers, and I to have been on them, she looks 'grey' which is normal is her SATS are low - amount of oxygen in the blood. If she is getting palpitations on and off, that will cause her BP to drop, also making her look washed out and feeling tired.

GP or A&E minor injuries would be my course of action. I really do hope she is okay, come and update for a while. She's not changed her dose or forgotten one or two has she?

Hands - I'll post the picks for you on here if you can't see them, let me know.

Sorry, posted on page two, so glad she's okay Ma xxx

You're doing too much though, you're burning yourself out sweetie... you really are and TheBabes are worried about you! Can you delegate some of the food jobs out? Or are you like me and a martyr like to do it yourself so it's just bloody done? But seriously, you do need to ask for help. Please? xxx

Turn and anyone else back onto day 1..... so what? Pick yourself up, dust yourself down and start again! Bet yourself that you can't do two days... booze wants you to fuck up, booze wants you to lose, be a soft sap, given in, and to what? More recycling?

I know it's fucking hard when life is utter shite but we ALL have shite times, some more than others... thing is, you came here for a reason and we want you to stay! Drinking or not, stay and talk it out. Or waffle!!

We do care about each other on this thread. :) xxx

Be back in a bit. Love you all lots! xxx

Thanks all. She is fast asleep just now. My sis is here sorting out the legals for dad and has done the shopping for the party and dh has collected the glasses. The dcs are making the cake tonight. The front room remains unpainted with paint pots and ladders in the front room but that will have to wait!
Visited dad today and he in very very frail. Still waiting for the green light to move him. I dont want to do TMI but the ...erm... stuff coming out of me just now is horrible and a bit scary.
So many things to worry about, I dont know where to begin!

ma

Okay, first - if the tmi is that serious, do you need to make an emergency appt to see your GP? You could also try NHS direct to see if they advise waiting - or ring your consultant, explain the situation and ask if they've had any cancellations so you could fit in.

Second, as mouse says, you're doing too much! Am glad to hear your family have stepped up - practise relying on them more.

Wish I could come up and give you a big hug - am sending you a warm cocoony t'interbosie

Morning ladies xx Ma are you ok? xx

I'm ok. Vile stuff is now looking like more normal blood so must be yet another period. Horrible spot/boil thingy on face has reappeared. Even neat TCP can't kill it. Going to look good in mums birthday photos....its the size of a small planet. Can't bring myself to squeeze it in case collateral damage takes out the entire family. Better get up...got to buy school shirts, beer, a slow cooker and a birthday card. Also do the ironing, paint the ceiling, take Ds to friends house....

Morning babes,

ma I hope dd is feeling better today, my god your really up against it!!! I'm not sure how you cope with so much pressure, maybe it's all in that spot. Big praise for not squeezing, I'd get tore in face or bum, sick but true.

Thanks to everyone for being so kind, I feel more than a little lost. I'm fairly sure it's my relationship with dh which triggers my manic episodes, I love him very much and I'm a typical only child, very loving and needy. He is one of four, not great at showing affection, likes time away from the family with his mates or in his own, och there are a million things I could bore you with but you get the gist.

The problem with depression is that you start to doubt your own feelings, your own thoughts so I have little confidence In my decision making abilities, I'm obviously not very good at decisions as I have recently had another stupid booze binge when my mood plummeted.

I am constantly trying to analyse my mood, looking for signs of any manic mood that may follow, it's bloody exhausting and I end up either missing or ignoring the bloody signs anyway.

I am very tired and confused and I'm fairly sure I'm unhappy but as I say, what the hell do I know!!!

I feel like stranger in my own life, hollow inside, it's very strange!!!

Love and hugs to all you glorious babes, thank god for you all xxx

Hey baby hope you are coming through the other side of this episode.
Indie you are right. But it won't get done if I dont do it. I am an on ironing break and have been culling everything which doesnt need ironing or which is rarely worn, and have just dumped a load of clothes in a charity bag and if the owners miss them then too bad! Sis is going to come and do a bit of ceiling - she has a neater hand and can do the edges better.
Mum got loads of cards in the post today and the house is already rammed with flowers and it's not her actual birthday u til Monday. She is very well loved - deservedly so. One of my nieces sent her some edible googly eyes to put on cakes and fruit to make some snack friends! She loves that!

Ma Sometimes you need to get some of the things done or else it becomes more of a worry,I agree that you are doing too much right now though! Bugger the ceiling. Amazon the shirts,slow cooker and card. They can probably send beer.

baby Yes I do know how that feels- what a brilliant description you give.That hollowness is normal for lots and lots of people. You are very hard on yourself really,I think that most of us here lose it to alcohol sometimes and we just have to get back up again. One of teh reasons I'm not trying to be completely dry this time round is that I now understand how poor I am with any kind of pressure,demands,targets,deadlines- all of those things make me upset and more likely to binge.
Just wondering is you've done any horse riding or meditation or anything nice for yourself recently?
I don't think you're needy I think you are the kind of person who's happiest when they have lots of other people to be with and bounce ideas off.

Anyhow lovely,good to see you and I hope you feel calmer soon x

Morning all! Had a lovely dinner out last night with mum which she really enjoyed, and a house party tonight. Not a good weekend to be AF so not even bothering to try to be honest.
How are you all?

Morning All

Ma so glad you had a lovely dinner with your mum, I hope tonight goes well, will be lovely for mum to have the family around her

Hope how on earth did I think you lived in London sorry bout that babe. Without too many details, how was Pitch Perfect 2? I'm so looking forward to seeing it!!! Was it as good as the first? I hope you had a lovely day with DD Well done with the run xxx

Baby hugging you honey

I am struggling with my 'sober' reality - it's full of raw emotion (although I am alot calmer and more patient) I am fundamentally bored, agitated with stuff, plus I've got a bad cold and I'm feeling like shite. Right moan over as this is nothing in comparison to what other babes are going through

My new glasses are doing my head in. I spent most of the week getting it all wrong with which pair I should have been wearing sounds pathetic, I know I keep reminding myself that life is ok

Khalisi hey babe, I hope you have a good run with April today! You go girl

Sweet hope you're ok honey

Fox sending love to you x

Waves at Guggs, Joey, Mouse , Venus, Isinde, Beaches, Nuff, Hands, Orange, Ruby , Wry, Rural and all you lovely Babes
I hope you're all having a good weekend. Happy Sunday x

Hi babes. Having a rare morning to myself as WB out doing his pretend job, kids gone out with grandma for a bit and no plans. Want to lie on couch and watch tv but feel guilty as house such a mess and need to exercise. Hmmm.

Ma glad you are having lovely weekend with your mum, you so deserve a bit of joy and relaxation Have fun, and hope dd is ok.

Spanna I am a Northern lass but no offence taken . I took the plunge into that bifocal time of life last year given my track record on losing glasses! Was dreading it but they work for me . Would be day 14 here but had single glad of wine with a meal out yesterday. Feel ok though, did not trigger a desire for more. Know that feeling you describe though. Am keeping it together but not happy. Having to cope with all this job uncertainty alone and unsupported makes me hate WB even more, and I just want to sleep all the time. How I wish he would just leave. . Fat chance till my money runs out though.

Love to all babes today. Have a good Sunday all of you

hope are there no options for being WB free? And I quite understand if there aren't any!

Oh, Ma, where to start? We have no marriage apart from in name, just a practical partnership which works 80/20 in his favour, so he has no incentive to leave, even though I have repeatedly made it clear to him where the door is.

He would make life hell and take me for every penny I own (therefore robbing off the kids too) and his family would gang up on me. I have nobody to turn to, no family of my own, and have enough to cope with at the moment without a legal case

Besides which, he just won't go. Why would he when he has everything paid for here and no intention of working in a real job?

He is the most entitled wanker I've ever met.

hope have pmd you

Hope sending massive hugs . Could you not go to Relate or something, even if it's on your own, to get some kind of advice? There must be some help out there.

Going to bed now. Will be back tomorrow. Night night ladies xx

Good morning, darling Babes,

April Hope you enjoyed our run, honey? 10k in 1h07 with a really fast last 3kms. How did you do? Btw, thank you for the run date. Without that I might not have made it out of bed.

Happy Monday, Babes.

Day 1 here.

khalisi, I could just about see you in the distance as I plodded along! First "run" for months though so it's a start. One step at a time. I'm very glad we made a date, I know I wouldn't have gone otherwise. You ok?

ma, glad your mum is having a good birthday. Hope things calm down for you soon.

hope, I don't know what to say, you sound like a saint, I think I'd have pushed him off a cliff by now...

spanna, you're doing so well. You're my inspiration. My (original) day 1 was your day 2, so I always mind myself of where I should be and it does help me stay on the bus.

Day 28 for me. Struggling with life a bit (toddler DD full on and not sleeping, work reorganisation, anxiety) but just remind myself how much harder I'd be finding it with a hangover.

Waves and hugs to all.

Hi all, just checking in. Both my dcs are in the middle of exam season here so we're all feeling a bit tired. And I've eaten too much cake. Why can't I stick to my diet. D'aaargh.

Not drinking though. Roll on half term when I can sleep for a week