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Original poster

Facebook feed of new guy. Thoughts?

101 replies

GrumpleMe · 01/05/2015 15:28

Just wondering what others would make of this:

Been with new guy for 5 months. Went to his place to watch something with his family. During a break, he was scrolling through his FB. Pic after pic after pic was semi naked models, bikini models, 'fitness' models etc. Semi-clad boobs and asses galore. They would have made up 9 out of 10 of the posts on his feed.

Would this bother you?

OP posts:
EnriqueTheRingBearingLizard · 01/05/2015 22:51

When someone shows you who they really are, take heed.
Sorry OP.

SagaNorensLeatherTrousers · 02/05/2015 08:02

It would be a turn-off for me too, sorry, for pretty much the same reason as Bluestocking said.

EhricLovesTheBhrothers · 02/05/2015 08:05

Yeah I'd probably dump too. What a loser.

molyholy · 02/05/2015 08:27

Would deffo dump. That would be a huge turn off. Especially at 45.

AvrilMarine · 02/05/2015 08:33

sounds a bit weird and chavvy, like he has no social skills.

AvrilMarine · 02/05/2015 08:35

arguably both sexes may discreetly admire attractive people from time to time.

It's the weirdness/social ineptness of collecting photos and scrolling through them in company that would be the turn-off for me.

TooBusyByHalf · 02/05/2015 08:36

He sounds immature. A few pictures of buff guys or girls would be ok IMO but a whole page of them means he's nothing interesting going on his life. Similarly a whole page of posts about boxing or anything else I really don't like would be a similar turn-off.

AlternativeTentacles · 02/05/2015 08:37

That is part of your research, drinking in information.

Only you can decide whether it is a deal breaker or not. It would be for me. Bleurgh.

Was he scrolling on purpose to see if you went 'Ooh naked ladies - you like those too?' or 'Ooh naked ladies - of course I don't mind your porn addiction'.

Bleurgh.

FeijoaSundae · 02/05/2015 08:40

Totally cringeworthy.

Everyone enjoys a fine form, but this is something else altogether. Really quite tragic in a 20-yo, let alone a 45-yo.

SagaNorensLeatherTrousers · 02/05/2015 08:44

Yeah, at 45 he should have some real, grown-up interests, not those of a horny 14 year old boy.

foxinsocks · 02/05/2015 08:46

I have a few friends who like those pages - I often wonder if they realise that the rest of facebook can see what they like Wink

Tbh I think it's a bit sad but maybe he's been single for a while and just fancied looking at pictures of some women? What I find weird is that people do it on facebook rather than privately!

jonicomelately · 02/05/2015 08:54

You all need to check out the 'crush' thread on here. Lots of Mumsnetters have posted pictures of attractive men, some of whom are wearing very little.
If you don't like the photos OP I would tell him, then judge whether he's a decent man by his reaction to your objection. I don't think he's a terrible person though for liking pictures of attractive women. A little childish perhaps, but nothing more than that.

Bluestocking · 02/05/2015 09:34

Way to miss the point, joni.

letscookbreakfast · 02/05/2015 09:37

He's a twat, it pisses me off when those kind of pictures appear in my newsfeed because friends have 'liked' them or their pages.

jonicomelately · 02/05/2015 09:38

Biscuit bluestocking

Original poster
GrumpleMe · 02/05/2015 10:08

I don't think he's a terrible person, Joni. Just not the right one for me.

I told him how I felt and his response was...underwhelming. I don't plan on seeing him again. It was just a huge turn off, and I feel like I'd be going out with an adolescent.

OP posts:
FeijoaSundae · 02/05/2015 10:10

Good for you Grumple.

sonjadog · 02/05/2015 11:14

I had a fling with a man some years ago. It didn't work out and I was very sad and disappointed at the time. About six months ago he asked me to be his friend on facebook. His feed was full of naked boobs and sexuality explicit cartoons and jokes. It was massively unattractive. I am so glad it didn't work out between us.

pocketsaviour · 02/05/2015 11:37

I would probably have had the same reaction to this as finding out someone I was seeing was a Daily Mail reader.

In other words, a massive disappointment and a guarantee of no further dates.

jonicomelately · 02/05/2015 11:42

I think that's absolutely fair enough Grumple
I just think the slightly hysterical response to a man looking at bikini clad women is naive. I haven't met a heterosexual man yet who wouldn't like looking at a picture of an attractive woman. Having said that I'd be amazed if DP (a) set up a Facebook profile and (b) posted images of women on it, so I completely get where you are coming from Smile

Original poster
GrumpleMe · 02/05/2015 12:04

I think he's just a bit clueless and immature, rather than anything more sinister.

But he is who is is, and I've never been interested in trying to change people. They always revert to type in the end.

OP posts:
JohnFarleysRuskin · 02/05/2015 12:40

Joni can you point out the slightly hysterical posts?

If I had a 45 yr old female friend who 9/10ths of her facebook was of scantily clad men, chests and pants, then I'd think, er no, we don't have much in common (thicko)

JulyKit · 03/05/2015 10:44

joni I'm not sure that finding certain behaviour naff and unattractive is a 'hysterical response' to it Grin

Original poster
GrumpleMe · 03/05/2015 11:10

So he sent me a txt this morning about how he was going to give up wicked thoughts, drinking, fornicating etc and go on a Buddhist retreat instead.

Not sure if he was trying to be funny or be a smart ass. Either way, I didn't respond.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 03/05/2015 11:14

I think you had a lucky escape there, op

he sounds like a dickhead