Just out of interest, is anybody planning to remain single?

[Marmaladedandelions]

I am in the process of divorcing my husband and I have absolutely no interest whatsoever in meeting somebody else. I'm quite surprised that one of the first things people have said is that maybe I'll meet someone else.

I don't want my DCs to have to share their home with a stranger and I don't want them to have to get used to stepsisters or stepbrothers. After my youngest has moved out I may consider it but as she isn't born yet it's a long, long way off :)

Am I alone in this? I seem to be quite unusual.

Well this it it though Ruby- even if he was 'for me' I would pass him by, for the next eighteen years at least.

I don't want my children having to share their home with a stranger, and this partly because of my own experiences but I haven't come across many happy homes with step families.

Get used to it OP - 'have you met anyone yet?' is the number one question married people will be asking you from now on!

I was happily single for many years, I've got a 'boyfriend' now we do not live together and I'm very comfortable with my own company.

I'm recently separated and while I can't imagine getting emotionally involved with anyone for some time, I also can't imagine staying single long term.

I certainly wouldn't entertain living with someone again unless I was very confident it was a long term relationship, not fair on dd.

That said I'm only early 40s and DD is heading for her teens so I don't think it's unreasonable for her to see me dating and having relationships, in a respectful way.

I have been single for 17 years (I'm 44) - I decided at 27 not to have any more relationships. And I have had all the "you will change your mind" crap from people. But I am in a healthier place mentally without a partner or children.

I always joke if I ever got into a serious relationship again I would insist on seperate houses!
Why not !

I'm early 30s so a long time to go. Sounds good!

4 years single for me.

I am quite resigned to being single forever - it used to bother me, not any more. For me to let someone into our lives now he would have to be pretty blooming special. Have tolerated so much rubbish and nonsense from men all my adult life - would never put us through that again now.

Yes Me.......Cannot be dealing with other peoples drama, plus I'm way to busy having fun and working etc. The no sex thing bothers me though?!?!!?

me

and if I have a pound for every person who says 'when you meet another man' I would be a millionnaire

appalling grammar and spelling (sorry on the train)

If I HAD a pound and millionaire!

I'm not remotely bothered by the thought of never having sex again

If I change my mind in the future a visit to Ann summers should sort me out ...

It may just happen when you least expect it to

I am 42 now

my vibrator gives me a lot less trouble than any man ever did

Rebel - but I don't want it to and even if it did, even if I met the man of my dreams, I wouldn't be marrying him or moving him in so it isn't going to happen any time in the next decade

I have two very young daughters, or will have, come the summer. They will take up MORE than enough time!

I've been a single mom forever, my boys are both big boys, my youngest is 14, I just turned 41, I don't want to share my bed, or my home with a gold digger, harsh but true, I have a lot more to loose! My problem, which is the potentials problem, is my attitude of "what are you bringing to the table, because I'm not afraid to eat alone".....all my exes are time wasters-commitment phone-tight-money pinching - individuals who can't deal with my fabulousness, so therefore they can go forth and multiply!

Sort of. I have been happily single for two years now and while I have no intention of marrying, cohabiting or introducing anyone to my children, I have not entirely written off the possibility of any relationship at all. A friends with benefits situation or a causal relationship that occurs solely when my DCs are at their dad's would be fine.

I think I would massively struggle with being a stepmother and I don't want to complicatey DCs lives with step siblings and a step father. I know it can work well for some people but when it doesn't it can be very very difficult indeed.

Same here. Have been single - no boyfriend, not even a date - for about 4 years now (I think). Very content with this situation and can't imagine ever wanting to be in a relationship again.

I had that too beyonce

rather foolishly after my divorce, I started going out with someone who seemed absolutely brilliant. It took 2 years for me to find out he had a major gambling problem and all sorts of money issues.

The problem is, like you say, is once you have been single for a bit, you have no reasons to tolerate any nonsense whatsoever. I have ended it with him and anyone new would have to be pretty spectacular to even cross the front door mat!

Like everyone else, I have children at home (full time with me, 2nd weekends with their dad), I have a full time job and the house feels perfect with just us in it. Anyone else would feel like an imposter now. Have no idea how I would meet anyone new unless I did something like internet dating, and I don't particularly want to and goodness knows how I would find any time to do this anyway!

my youngest turns 14 this year too Beyoncé

TheWhite - that's interesting about step children. One of the reasons I haven't wanted to date too is most of the men I would meet of my age or older will have children and I just don't want to have this complication in the children's lives yet. I don't think they are ready for it.

I've been single coming up 8 years and no plans to change that unless Aidan whatsit off Poldark decides he wants an older woman and rocks up at my front door.

I did have a few ill-fated dalliances after I split with the ex in 2004 (at one point I had three on the go at once) but none of them were live-in, and in the end I just couldn't be arsed with it all.

I like my single life the way it is, and just couldn't envisage myself being with someone ever again. I'm certainly not looking.

There's a big difference between being 'alone' and 'lonely'.
I'm the former, not the latter.

I hope this doesn't make me sound awful, but I couldn't cope with being a stepmother and nor would I expect a man to cope with being a stepfather.

I think it's one of, if not the most, difficult relationships out there.

FWB is why I have a beautiful little two year old girl (whoops)
I had a relationship from 17-23 stayed myself from then until about 27 got involved seriously again, got my heart broken again & since then have always lived by myself ! (Not counting small person)
Not keen for letting it happen for a third time.
Never short of male attention but genuinely couldn't be less interested & the thought of living with a bloke again makes my teeth itch!
I'm only 33 & obviously have no clue what's around the corner but I can hand on heart say I prefer being single & not looking for another "half"
People always think you're fibbing when you say that & crack shelf wise cracks...
If this is the shelf I'm not complaining

Well the way I see it with blended families, lets for e.g. say I have my 2, he has his 2, immediately our families have grown by 100%. if you're both well off, it's all good, but if one is well off and the other isn't do I then go on holiday without you, just the two of us (which I don't mind doing, but would want big holidays with my boys), do you tag along with us leaving your two at home = unfair.

Christmas presents, I like to spoil my kids, do not want to be questioned about how much I spent, but then if we became blended family does this now mean my kids must expect less etc?

For me most of it comes down to money and not willing to change/compromise mine or my children's lifestyle for anyone else, including their children......I'm a big meanie, I know! LeSiiiigggghhhhhh

Why would I trade one grumpy old bastard for another? No way!