My dad is always angry. Always looking for stuff to get cross about. He's poised, waiting for me to fuck up.
He came round yesterday and immediately had a go at me for 'forgetting' to put my bins out. I had put them out, then brought them back in once they'd been emptied. Told him this - feck knows why I felt the need to defend myself. He then told me there was rubbish in one of them. Yes, stuff I'd just put in. Made me anxious - goes back to him going through my bedroom bin as a child and my mum going through the bathroom bin checking my sanitary towels as a teen (no idea).
He phones a lot too. Will often phone shortly after I've finished a nightshift or really early and then moan because I'm asleep. If I don't answer he keeps phoning. Takes it personally if I don't answer.
My mum is equally difficult. She's started letting herself into my home (going to look at getting new locks). If I've left something out she'll read it. I left a packet of pills on the side once and she had a good read asking what they were for. If post arrives when she's there she'll go through it, ask what it all is and hover around me trying to read over my shoulder if I open it.
(I think she's developing dementia. She's started making really racist comments. Something I'd rather not listen to.)
I'm a private person. Mostly because I had no privacy as a child. None. I was so anxious all of the time.
They also seem to come into my house and take it over.
Is there any way I can keep them at arms length without being horribly rude??