The Brave Babes Battle Bus - The Wheels On This Bus Go Around And Around, In Search Of Sobriety.

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

This is the brave babes bus, Gerald. He travels far and wide, to wherever he's needed to offer non judgemental support, advice and Opal Fruits!!

We can tell you about the kind of places that can help, your GP can be the first and easiest place to start, or you can look up you local community addiction centre, or even just come onto the thread and let it all out.

There are posters here who have been on the Bus from the start and those who have just joined us

It doesn't matter how long you've been here, the fact that you have taken that first amazing step in acknowledging that maybe, just maybe, things aren't quite right with your drinking is truly MASSIVE!!

This is a safe place for you to just be and to be as honest as you like, or just to talk.

We'll listen

And if you'd like to see our last thread, you can JUST HERE

Plus if you'd like to see where these threads all began, you can read all about that YOU CAN READ THIS VERY EMOTIONAL AND MOVING THREAD

See you soon,

Mouse xxx

Took quite a shine to Luke McLean myself Ma.

Get yourself some sparkly docs to go with your posh frock

I meant to say, earlier, but I am having terrible memory problems today, Ma, we're all on the bus for the support (giving and receiving); we're not here for the drama, it's not AIBU. We're here for you whatever you do or don't do, sidecar, roof rack or driver's seat.

Khalisi sounds like a lovely belated birthday.

Hello! You lot are making me laugh tonight . Faire - the poor woman's liposuction !!!

Ma, I know exactly where you are at. Me too. It's hard. I used to have a friend in RL who used to goad me to split up with him, but I think she just wanted some drama in her life. She would have helped me for a bit and then disappeared if I got too needy with the babysitting etc (DCs were much younger then - I don't see her now, funnily enough).

Like you, I know what I need to do. But when you have a lot of other things on your plate (for me the redundancy thing, for you much more) you need to choose a time best for you. I understand. I really, really do. And when you are sick of the WB just board the bus for a rest and we will look after you.

Can't help on the shoe front though. I used to wear heels all the time until I had kids. Now when I try to wear them I walk like Dick Emery in drag. Ruins the effect. Khalisi the glam will have to be your shoe coach!

Sweet, sorry you had a bad night out pet. I would have hated it too. My idea of a good night now at the moment is watching films on my laptop with dd and a bit of chocolate. And thanks for your encouragement up-thread. I missed it somehow on my phone, but you are right, I need to keep trying. I was thinking today (big old Day 3, wow ) what do I think will happen when I open a bottle? Do I think it will solve things? I know the problems will still be there when I reach the end of the bottle, along with all the worries about my drinking. And then I'll have to deal with them with a hangover. D'aaaagh!!!!

Having said that, have had such a bad week at work. Sent a really snotty email to our line manager about their lack of openness re: the redundancy. He was very curt in his reply. He is usually pleasant to deal with, but at the end of the day he has come in to preside over getting rid of us for the least money possible. I hate conflict, but am sick of letting them off the hook if you know what I mean.

Baby I have bought some Rescue Remedy. They now do it in chewing gum and sweets too! They were 3 for 2 in Boots so I got all three types. Not as immediately effective as a bucket of Merlot, but none of the vile after effects either.

Right, got to get ds's tea now, will be back later to nc the lovely babes I have missed.

Still struggling but feel much better for 3 days off the booze. And have bought Freddo Frog chocolate for tonight

Nothing quite as comforting as cheap chocolate, Hope! I'm interested to hear how you find the rescue remedy sweets. As awful as the prospect is, you must be counting the days at work, they just get worse don't they?

I'm beginning to really see the financial benefits of not drinking, beyond the ticking numbers on I'm Done Drinking, for the second month running, our credit card bill is half our average monthly spend. I'm genuinely at the difference it is making.

Hello babes sorry not been around, still been reading though. Sorry to hear so many struggling.

Hey Joey how you doing?

Still waiting for those daffodils to grow back sweets

How are you doing?

Hey joey and all other lovely babes, good to see you all here. Wanted to echo what at least two other people just said to ma - I really hate that voyeuristic, impatient attitude you sometimes see in people on mn (and other forums, naturally). They get all upset if you don't give them a story that ends just how they want it to, preferably within 48 hours at the most. Fuck 'em all, this is no story, this is your life! The bus (and sidecar, or whatever) is here and just keeps trundling along, with all of us aboard, giving and taking what we each need from it.

Another good AA meeting tonight. Have come home with a bunch of leaflets to read, including one for DH, if I can manage to be brave enough to give it to him.

Someone mentioned merlot up there. Merlot was what pulled me down off the bus last time. The very thought of it. It just snuck up and got me, the sneaky bastard.

Great post to ma (and anyone else in that position) get you're so right, this is real life, not an episode of Eastenders.

I've been struggling all week, got a bad back and stress at work. My exercise plan lasted approximately 24 hours before I hurt my back, so I'm still unfit. DD making options at school for gcse, so 2 parents evenings!

Today DH and I had a row, culminating in me storming off (and having to get the bus home, the No. 24, not This Bus) as he drove home without me. We were still barely talking when he went out tonight with his mates.

And then I got a migraine, luckily I don't get them too bad - but with that and the backache AND the argument, well I'm just waiting for DD to go to bed before I cracking open the wine.

Sorry for the whinging.

On the plus side, I have made DD eat spinach, and introduced her to Fleetwood Mac, so am doing well on the parenting front at least.

Thanks all. You put it in perspective and give me hope.
joey sending you hugs. Fleetwood Mac can only be a good thing!
hope one day........

Where is indie?
And wry
And mouse....

Thanks ma how are you doing today?

A combination of wine, a sudden crush on Jason Isaacs and a row with DH has sent me off to Facebook to look at my distraction...

Shit DD just came in crying cause she had a nightmare about gcses /hpv jab/ parents fighting

And there's me, looking up old flames on Facebook...

Morning All.

Sorry, I crashed out at 8apm last night, I'd had an awful stress headache all day - from clamping the smile on the night before and clenching my teeth I think - I couldn't stay up right another minute.

Joey, I'm good (ish). 60 days sober today and thinking about making it to 100!

Gardening is all about the anticipation - now you've mastered daffodils, you need one of these< they flower every 7-10 years!

DS is selecting options too (his school start a year early), which has been fairly straight forward apart from the fact his ambitions outstrip his ability to be bothered . I think the expectation that they can make decisions that potentially determine their future at such a young age is ridiculous. And don't even get me started on the changes to the exam system DS will be sitting. Teachers must be at their wits end.

Sober, it's so good that AA is working for you.

Right, I'm about to open the curtains to see whether I can get in the garden today, I have big plans for a spot under my kitchen window that just has gravel and wheely bins on it.

Yah! It's sunny! I will be out there just as soon as I get my wellies on.

Morning babes,

My layout has reverted back to the old one and I'm hating it, everything is so small on my phone!! Have I pressed the wrong button??? Nightmare!!! Xxx

alias I love Jason Isaacs......and I understand the searching for the distraction thing too.

Good morning, Babes!

Oh Joey at being almost caught stalking old flames!

I went AWOL yesterday. Got off the bus and all emotional shit relating to family I've been hiding from for three and a half years just hit me. I cannot remember the last time I started crying mid day and didn't stop till I went to bed.
I went for a run with only the support of this bus to keep me moving. Crying, crying, crying.
Then I got back and the shit continued.
So at 6pm I thought fuck it and went to bed. Just as I was falling asleep the door bell rings and its my neighbour.
Her toxic relationship is well, toxic and she just needed to get out of the house (and why not go for a fucking walk like normal people?!!!).
Normally I'm all there but honestly, my eyes were puffy and the lips swollen. So it must have been bloody clear I felt shit myself.
But no, she came it and stayed for two hours!
I offered her a drink and had two glasses myself. But I told her after my second you are free to have another beer but I'm trying to not drink more than two glasses a night.
Thank God she left.
Crashed into bed. Woke up REALLY puffy (Shit!) feeling like clearning and must say, living in a big old house has its advantages. Like loud music at 9am on Sunday.
So, house clean. Going to work for a few hours and just keep myself busy.

Hope everyone is having a mellow Sunday.

Oh, Sober, well done on the meeting, my darling! I think your DH will be even more touched when you give him the brochure. Because you will be validating his hurt and for the first time giving him something in writing to prove it.
Well done!

Hey khalisi sorry you had such a shit day and hope things better today. Have had a total meltdown. Lost it after visit to dad. House locked up, he was curled up in his bed, fully dressed. Hasn't eaten anything. Refused to get up or have anything to eat. Just started crying and saying he wanted it all to be over.
So I came home and had a meltdown and dh, for once, rose to the occasion and hugged me etc which made it worse because it just made me feel so guilty for wanting and planning to leave him. I just can't cope anymore.he went through all the things bothering me - dad, my job,boiler not working- and then said "is there anything else?" And there was the moment........the chance to say all the things about our relationship....and I said nothing.I didn't say any of it. I can't go on with him and I can't leave and I can't cope.

Aw Ma, big hugs. Maybe it wasn't the right moment. There will be other moments when you feel stronger, it's not wise to begin a confrontation when you are most vulnerable.

for you. I wish I could help in RL. But I can listen. And I will, and we all will. Anytime you need to talk.

Have to go now, watching dd in a dance and fashion show (it's awful, all dance mums, ugh) but will check in later.

Am throwing a blanket over you and Khalisi and leaving you a massive stash of chocolates. Big hugs to you both.

Khalisi, how are you now poppet? This stuff has to come out, just wish you had had a more comforting friend.

Ma, as Hope said, there will be other moments. How is your dad now? Both my MIL and my Nan got to a very similar stage, there is little you can do except see to their immediate needs and maybe hold their hands until it passes, - until next time.

Hope, did you survive dance mom hell?

I got to spend time doing heavy digging in the sun, so I'm a happy bunny. Now it's raining, which is also good because I did some planting and cleared away a thick slate layer on soil I want to plant next week. Trouble is, a glass of wine was always my gardening reward, and I'm cooking Sunday dinner, so double temptation. I'm drinking mint tea just so everything will taste rubbish until it passes.

Hello there lovely babes

Transferring from sidecar to bus for a long over due af night.

Haven't read thread but love to all x

Day 1,may not manage more than that. Also coming off the ad's : )

. Welcome back. Are you doing the ADs gradually? Get one night with us under your belt then see how you feel about a second one, you could go for day four euphoria!

Hey guggs good to see you.
Went back to dads. Still in bed, hadn't moved at all. Was frightened when I went in as he didn't know who I was. As far as I know he has had no food or liquid for 24 hours now. There is no point sending him to hospital, it will stress him too much and to be honest he would just be taking up a bed. He and I would rather he died at home. Richard has come( my brother, for those who dont know his story) but he is not a tower of strength to be honest and is unable to cope with it all. I dont want it triggering a relapse in him when he has so painstakingly rebuilt his life.

Hello lovely,yes I've been winding the ad's down and I just feel better. Sort of the opposite of how I felt when I started them so I think it's the right time to stop. I have 1/2 a packet in case of need.

As for drinking,well that's not going so well but today I am not drinking and that's as far as it goes!

How are you lovely? I will catch up with all you wonderful women and read the thread properly!

Anyone else delighted that it's spring. Us wussy southerners had some warmish sunshine today

Does he have any care workers calling during the day ma?