Older married man has admitted to having a crush on me. Is there any way back from this?

[NursingMilitant]

Basically a man who is much older than me and married has admitted tonight that he finds me attractive and doesn't know where he stands regarding our relationship. He is the instructor of a martial acts class I train in, I love the club dearly and it is a huge part of my life. I'm gutted to have this come up and spoil it. Not only has he admitted it (and I've suspected it for a while but hoped I was wrong) but he's also tested the water to see how far I'm willing to go with him asking me if I want to go around to his house before club tomorrow for coffee and asking if I want him to get there early so we can "chat" before anyone else gets there.

I have talked about my DP a lot to him so this is two relationships he seems willing to risk for this. I obviously said I didn't want to go to his house or get there early to club and he was blatantly disappointed and seemed to pry further.

I basically do not want to fall out with him, I respect him and enjoy his classes but this is just so inappropriate and wrong on all levels and needs to stop now. I really don't want to leave the club but realistically is there any way back from this?

Are his initials JM OP?

Buzzard, yes those are his initials! where abouts are you?

Intriguing!

oh come on now...

initials, confirmation of initials....spilllllll the beans.....

Buzzard....i was so humming that! Like JD in SCRUBS. Now, tell Aunty CatsClaus all that you know, we don't want to trouble the OP now do we?

Oh no, is Buzzard his wife?

Not buying it so far.

Trex thread was one of my favourites. (Off topic, soz) there were loads of odd ones around that time.

Thanks anneofcheese and fairenough

Ditto. Not seen either of those before but Sharon and the wasp is hilarious.

Who is JM is now the question?

just read t.rex and Sharon threads!!! Hilarious!!!!
Now, who is JM?????
Come on, spill the beans!

I don't mind at all not knowing who JM is.

I just want to know if they are talking about the same person & what the story is there. Is the OP finally seeing that MartialMan has form? Is Buzzard JM's wife or another unwilling recipient of JM's attentions?

Are they going to join forces and KungFu JM's arse into "leaving students well the fuck alone"?

And does he make good coffee. The tension is killing me.

Oh God, sorry for the anti-climax but it was a different JM. These initials are suprisingly popular in Martial Arts instructors in their 60's . Have no idea what happened to OP.

My husband is John Major

ah well thanks for reporting back and not leaving this as one of those "unsolved MN mysteries!".

I never knew John Major was a martial arts instructor though - nice career change for him.
:)

JM? Judo Man?

I did think in last thread it was very weird for a guy to send you messages so late at night. Explaining he came on to you would allay your partner a bit.

Time to change clubs.

It seems to me that if you've slept with this guy, it's no wonder he is giving you so much attention. No wait...I might have imported someting into the thread that wasn't there - sorry. Not that I'm wanting the story to take that direction or anything...

strange comment

GoatsDoRoam, that is a succinct and brilliant summation. I'm going to copy it to share with my friends who have girls. (though not immediately, as I have boundaries and want to keepMN separate from RL!)

a differerent JM...I am so disappointed.

I think that if you really don't want to leave the class, you need to make it clear to him that you will not be communicating with him AT ALL except during the lessons and while everyone else is there.

If he carries on hassling you, I would suggest telling him that you will report him to whatever martial arts association he is a member of.

If that doesn't work, you will just have to leave and find another class.
The ball is in your court, OP.