I posted the other day about DP who had a message from OW and what to do about it.
As an update, I have asked himabout it in detail again, despite the fact we are not able to talk face to face at the moment (he's working in Scotland).
When I bought it up, he was irritated. He eventually seemed to see that it was fair of me to want to ask about the incident, having had to get over it the day after it happened as I had so much on with work, and having had time to think about it, more questions came into my mind and I wanted answers. I felt the chat went reasonably well, once he came round to talking about it. He went to bed (early start the next day), and I emailed him to say thanks for the chat, I appreciated him staying up late when he had work to talk about this nad put my mind at rest. The next day he acknowledged my email but that was it. I was genuinely feeling better, though, and as if he had taken my concern seriously.
Last night I asked for the rent payment (he contributes x amount per month in an arrangement we have). I have had to ask him for this payment a few times, and his excuse is that he is busy at work, so I left it. I asked again today and was quite irritated - said he had no apprciation that this is his responsibility and i should not have to constantly ask for it (AIBU?). He then messaged to say he the reason he hadnt paid it yesterday was because i had upset him by asking about the OW issue again - he repated that he felt it was unfair of me so he had then proceeded not to pay this portion of our rent. I have since become so angry with him - aksing why I am not allowed to bring up something that is bothering me, without him then playing games with rent and his responsibilities? He has since proceeded to pay me the money - but less than usual by about a quarter...not sure why?? and add to the fact that we had a big bill this month so 2 weeks ago he said he would pay in more than normal anyway! I'm sitting in tears on my lunchbreak..completely confused and hurt - why is he being like this? I don't understand.
The part that hurts the most is that we are saving for our own home and he will talk so freely about our future together - only for me to say i am unhappy about the way he has behaved and for him to then behave in what i can only call as being like a child. is this unfair of me? i feel physically sick and drained.