Horrible relative has invited herself and her husband to Xmas lunch - argh!

[intothenevernever]

Narcissistic, unpleasant aunt has invited herself to lunch. There will already be 15 of us in a small house. Do we just have to grin and bear it? Oh god, we do, don't we.:( Bloody families!!!!!

What are you going to do?

Do nothing and seethe with resentment?

Ring them up and say you're sorry but that doesn't work for you.

Or ' if you're expecting lunch it will be off your lap on a paper plate...' (and the gravy is HOT!)

Seriously ??

Reply - Im afraid we are at not having any more guests this Christmas but I wish you a Happy Christmas and New year etc.

Or you can out loon her! Call her and do a full ten minute rant of how she could possibly have the front after you're catering for so many already, how about twenty two people pile round her house for mince pies tonight and see how much she likes it!

It is an impossibility to host her!

Don't bother calling. More chance of being steamrollered ;)

"Hi horrible aunt, only just seen your email.Sorry- that's not going to work. We can't accommodate any more people in our house. Hope you have a great time at horribleauntshusbandsrelatives'"

I wouldn't give any explanation as to why they can't come other than "it doesn't work for us".

I know the obvious answer is 'well tell her no, then', but she will go bleating to our overseas relations that we refused to have her, and they will have a go at us for being so mean. My poor mother is distraught about this. She and odious relative can't bear each other, but she doesn't want a full-scale family meltdown. :(

How about "I'm afraid we've already made our arrangements for Christmas day but we'd love to see you both in the New Year. Best wishes for a very happy Christmas..."

You're being ridiculous. Just say I'm sorry but that doesn't work for us, we don't have any room.

Email back with "Sorry we can't host you. Have a nice day"
If you're feeling brave add that you're going out to distant pub for lunch. Remove batteries from doorbell and ignore.

And have the overseas relloes offered to host her?? Thought not. Just tell them the same: it wasn't convenient and you don't get on!

So you'd rather this woman ruined Christmas for everyone? Just say no. When overseas relatives complain suggest they have her next year.

So what if she moans to other relatives and they try to have a go at you. Tell them to mind their own business.

How could you let your mum be distraught over this? Just tell her NO.

But it's your house and your Christmas! So what if she goes bleating to anyone else. And if it's going to upset your mum by them being there, even more of a reason to tell them that they can't come.

It's outrageous thinking that you can invite yourself to someone's house for Christmas.

Let her then !

Seriously if any one starts just repeat " It wasn't possible this year "

No way would I have someone who upsets my Mum in the house.

Stuff the reactions of the overseas relatives--if they are that bothered they should invite the odious couple over there.
It Christmas time and your poor DM will be miserable--send that text now and give her and yourself a Christmas day that you want and will enjoy.

Remember NO is a complete sentence

If your mother doesn't get on with her and she is going to ruin everybody's Christmas, tell her to bugger off! The overseas relatives are just that- overseas. Who invites themselves over for lunch, never mind Christmas lunch??

haha lots of similar x posts

It doesn't matter what other relatives will think. Email her, phone her and say that your plans are already made and that you are sorry but you can not accommodate her this year and please stick to it. Don't let her wear you down. Just say that it doesn't work for you this year.

OP I have to say you are your own worst enemy. This does not have to happen. You are choosing to accept this self-invited guest, so you have no-one to blame but yourself.

Sorry, I know you just wanted a moan but really you are bringing this on yourself so either say no, like you should, or suck it up.

Sod what everyone else will say! Email back and tell her that doesn't suit!

LET. HER. BLEAT!
it's rude and unreasonable of her to do this.

email her back and say that it's not possible and that she'll have to just make her way to other poor sap victim directly instead. make sure that you include the comment about already having to have refused others and you really can't accept anymore.

there's no confrontation here, she's chosen the method of communication so as to not enter into discussion with you, use it back on her.

Email and just say that they mustn't worry about trying to squeeze you in on Xmas day as you don't have any space but would they like to come over early January for Sunday lunch instead when it's calmer