Paying for sex

[avoiretre]

Anyone seen this article in the Mail:
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2838656/One-nine-men-admits-paid-sex-Single-men-aged-25-34-professional-jobs-likeliest-group-use-prostitutes.html#comments
Looking at the comments at the bottom, most think that most men pay. Is this more true than we like to admit?

[AnyFucker]

Looo- zeerr

[Lioninthesun]

I think if men were honest they'd know deep down it was wrong (otherwise they'd all be open about it at the start of a relationship and it wouldn't be a taboo topic only to be talked about with other men) unless they DO tell everyone, in which case you have to hope it is ignorance that makes them think people would be accepting of it. They can't know the reality behind many of the women in the trade.

[Tobyjugg]

And I am one of them AnyFucker To quote a common phrase of the 1970s "I've never had to pay for it in my life!"

[AnyFucker]

IT's not just about "having" to pay for it though, I think

To me, it's about the mindset of a person who thinks money can buy someone's consent

[Tobyjugg]

Yet some people who would pay for sex would be horrified if you suggested to them that they might use bribery and corruption in heir everyday (i.e. non-sexual) lives. (But, of course, some wouldn't).

[Tobyjugg]

*their

[AnyFucker]

indeed

[ApocalypseThen]

I can't imagine the mindset of someone who wants to have sex with people who are somewhere on the scale of indifferent to repulsed by them. I'd find that deeply humiliating on a visceral level.

If you had a soul, it would probably be pretty soul destroying.

[Eekaman]

''Confirms that about 1 in 9 men you will encounter are total cunts.''

OK lady blah blah. So you think nearly 10% of men are 'total cunts' because they've had sex with a working girl, maybe you think plenty more are just your average run of the mill 'cunts'?

Interesting that you choose to use the word 'cunt' to describe men who pay women for sex. To me, and surely most others, a cunt is a beautiful thing to be loved, adored and worshipped, rather than be used as a term of abuse.

Now, before I get destroyed by MN, I should say that I don't visit working girls and never have (I just don't see the point when there are so many willing partners available, but I do not see why if a man has sex with a working girl, he's a 'total cunt'.

[LadyBlaBlah]

I might have to up the numbers from 1 in 9 if you are telling me you have never visited "working girls"

Obvs it's not a good enough indication of arseholeness.

[Pastmyduedate0208]

Eeakaman.
Paying for sex does actually make you a cunt, yes.

[Eekaman]

No, it's not really not much at all Lady blah blah.

Why not call me a cunt as well, as it seems like you want to, or are you just calling me an arsehole? I'm easily confused... :)

[Lioninthesun]

Christ, if any man told me he 'worshipped my cunt' I'd send him packing. I have far more interesting parts to me! Sounds like porno 101 to me.
Actually ponders if she was indeed told this when young and nubile and possibly drunk... Either way, it would be quite revolting to me now.

[ScrambledEggAndToast]

I stumbled across the websites UKPunting (thanks Mumsnet!) OMG, what an eye opener The way the men on there talk about the women is just disgraceful, they are just something for them to w**k in. They all give each other tips etc.

[FolkGirl]

I've read those comments. Especially the comments along the lines of, "it's no wonder we pay for it when our wives look like they do" and firstly, that's exactly why I'm staying single!

But, secondly, why are they getting married in the first place if that's how they feel? Abd if they feel that they're 'paying' and so resentful if it, why not stay single and just do what they want? That's what I've never understood. Surely if they marry someone who repulses them, they had some say in it. They didn't have to do it.

[Eekaman]

Pastmyduedate,

Puhlease... don't try to infer that I've used sex workers as I clearly stated earlier, I haven't. I don't see the point, it just doesn't work for me.

However, if you wish to insult me again, feel free to express your thoughts.

[TheHermitCrab]

FolkGirl
I've read those comments. Especially the comments along the lines of, "it's no wonder we pay for it when our wives look like they do" and firstly, that's exactly why I'm staying single!

You're staying single because some men make these comments? Sounds a bit daft writing them all off because if the misogynistic internet trolls? Especially when you disagree with them talking about women on a whole in such a manner. You're practically doing the same thing to all the decent men out there and ring fencing them with these idiots.

There are many reasons why men make those kind of comments.

• They actually think that way - they are sexist nasty pigs
  
• They know it winds women up, they are trolls
  
• They are bored, and probably write equally immature comments about various other subjects.
  

Then there's the decent men, who would never pay for sex, who disagree with these men, but know better than to have a petty one-sided argument with these neanderthals on a facebook comments page.

[Twinklestein]

If their wives are genuinely unattractive, can you imagine what they must look like themselves?

Some men are so unattractive and obnoxious that they can't get a woman to have sex with them without paying them.

A good reason for not becoming a prostitute one would have thought.

[LadyBlaBlah]

Which part of not using sex workers "doesn't work for you" Eekaman?

[Audeca]

I'm pretty sure it is much more than that...50% directly and 95% indirectly would be my guess.

[TheHermitCrab]

Audeca

avoiretre wrote that sentence word for word on the first page of the thread....

[Lioninthesun]

So we mainly all agree more men have slept with sex workers than admitted it for this article, we agree they are usually aware it is not something to divulge in public (therefore that it is wrong on some level), we also agree that these men are more likely than not pretty ugly themselves (especially if they have married someone who they themselves think is ugly) and that for most people the basic idea of having sex with someone, who is indifferent to you at best, purely because you can pay them is not particularly ego boosting.

And yet we all know it isn't just the smelly ugly beer bellied men who do this - it's also relative youngsters in Amsterdam, it's the husbands on the business trips, divorced men and the stag do's all over the world. A wide range of ages/class/abilities/interests/intelligence.

I don't think I'll ever understand men.

[Twinklestein]

I don't agree that more men have slept with prostitutes than admit it in this survey. This isn't the only survey of its kind, many of which are anonymous, and generally they come out with roughly the same figure of around 10%.

This survey is described as 'computer assisted self-interview' whatever that may mean.

Some women here have low expectations of men and apparently hang out with some quite ghastly examples. If they report that prostitute-use among such men is higher than average, that tells you a lot about those men and absolutely nothing about the rest of the male population.

[LadyBlaBlah]

www.independent.co.uk/voices/comment/this-is-what-the-one-in-ten-british-men-who-pay-for-sex-need-to-know-9869621.html

Naice article, from a man too