How much contact is normal 11 dates in?!

[knowledgeispower]

This might sound like a ridiculous question. .. because it probably is!

So... I started online dating at the beginning of September and went on a few dates and the third one I met I started dating regularly. Its been two months since our first date. He works Monday - Friday 9-5 and I work part time and study so we both have busy lives.

At the start most of the contact was initiated by him and he would ask about a good time to call etc in the evening or making suggestions for dates. The majority of our contact was via email in the evening with maybe one call per week between dates at the weekend.

So the weekend just gone I was busy with friends and he had a family thing to go to so we didn't see each other. We haven't spoken on the phone at all for nearly two weeks. Email contact has been regular but we have both been busy. There have been no arrangements made for the next two weekends as he may have a friends birthday night out to go to either this Saturday or the next. Anyway he said we could amend plans at the last minute last week.

I really don't know what I'm asking but does this sound normal? Should I mention this weekend this evening when he contacts me? I could be making plans to do something with friends and feel like I'm just hanging on although not appearing needy.

Surely I shouldn't be over thinking things at this early stage?! Maybe the problem is mine?

Actually he always emails around 8:30. Think what you want! Would you like me.to attach screen shots. .. I thought I was pathetic

Who said you were pathetic?

Me. I haven't got time for this. Think what you want.

Nobody said anything about pathetic

I just did... I'm calling myself pathetic for the self blame stuff.

Are you trying to poke us into calling you out as a hormonal wreckhead ?

We can do it if you want, but I don't believe you

I think you were feeling disquietened by the silence from your beau, we confirmed it for you and now you want to backtrack

That is totally your prerogative of course.

Cross post. Self blame isn't pathetic, lovey. It's a kneejerk reaction to beign dicked around by men. Doesn't make it true.

Oh dear, I answer the door and have a chat with my son and come back to this. OP, in my honest opinion he is playing you, you know it but are double doubting. We have hormones, good for us. If anything they help you call it! Is he worth all this much, really????? A new relationship is like ping pong, not him keep smashing it over the table.....

Its artifical hormones though not organic. The doctor said that it can cause this in some women. I'm going back to my normal pill and I'm holding off making a final judgement until then.

I'm in no fit state to comment further as I feel like I've been torn a new one emotionally.

thank you to everyone who has contributed.

Cause what ?

what on earth has this got to do with him? what on earth has this got to do with HIS lack of contact? It should flow regardless OP.

why does he live with his mother at his age? OP he's a loser.. you know it but just dont want to give it up.

I didn't realise he always emailed you regularly at 8.30pm. That seems pretty consistent.

Your hormones have created a forcefield around you ? Preventing WiFi, cables, telephone lines and disabled car engines ?

Those hormones could bring the world to it's knees. I reckon the Villian in the next Bond Movie has been spawned

OP, you haven't been ripped anything. I am attempting to make you see how preposterous your self blame is. This bloke made you feel insecure. The End.

If he lives with his parents, I bet they have a landline, therefore no need to go up a hill. Working 9- 5 is hardly busy, all night free and a 40 min drive is hardly far. Sounds weird to me too.

OP - parents always have landlines. Always. Especially in areas when the mobile signal is atrocious. Just saying ...

Yep, parents of grown men always have landlines. They are not part of the "mobile age"

Indeed AF. And when they do have mobile phones, they leave them turned off 'to save the battery'.

/off topic

heh

OddFodd you made me laugh. My mum has only just got a mobile.

We have

He lives with his parents
He doesnt do consistency
He scratches back when pulled up and makes it out to be something else

He's an arse

The one thing i personally dislike about him is he justifies no contact and turns it around to be OP's fault. An arse.

OP, are you actually a 15 year old girl? You don't sound much older?

Why can't you go to his friend's birthday do with him? We are all different but, this kind of thing wouldn't interest me at all. Its a new relationship you should still have that happy, heady, excited feeling. Not be wondering. Unless you are both teens, whats with the "impression" that you don't want to get into anything serious? Let him know you would like to see him more etc..I wouldn't worry about coming across as needy or wanting something more serioius. I mean you must do, as you are here asking for advice. Put it to him in your own way, and you will have your answer via his reaction.

When you're grown it really is better not to tiptoe around these things, you could end up wasting your own time and what's the point of that. On the other hand, he may also want to be with you more and thats a good thing. Either way...a man who is really into a woman makes time for her. He woose her. He isn't busy running a couintry, is he? So, talk to him and hopefully that will go ok but maybe for now, don't put all your eggs in 1 basket. A mistake I feel is often made, whilst men are still out there dating elsewhere before they reach a decision...